telling nanny the children aren't well.

[peppapigsmummy]

Hiya. Im a nanny who brings my own child (ds is 3)
I am extremely lucky and greatful for my job.

But, several occasions have arisen where I have arrived at work to find the children quite unwell. Flu..vomiting bugs...and today dihorea and obvious stiffly symptoms that are making them very sad and clingy.

I get no pre warning, if my ds is poorly I call the day before so we can discuss what I/we can do. But I never get the same consideration. Its annoying as it means I could avoid my son getting poorly by arranging care for him with grandparents, but instead the bug does its round in our house because son is exposed to it. I know children get poorly regardless but feel a basic text of pre warning should be reasonable? Tbh even if I didn't bring ds, it would be nice to know so I can adjust plans (activities/play dates) accordingly.

am I expecting to much? I just feel like if you employ a nanny with their own child (and pay a reduced rate accordingly) it should be somthing the employer should take into consideration (as in..if their kid makes my kid sick..my kid makes me sick...that could be time off work for me...as apposed to one or two days off for them to help child get better?) hope im making sense and don't sound awful.... a cold fine...neurovirus? not so much.

Have you explained to your employer that you would prefer and are able to make alternative care arrangements for your DS when your charges are ill?

I thought it was something we'd discussed in initial interview, but perhaps not enough. (as in they asked what happens when my son is sick..) I just guess I thought since we are both parents it would just be somthing we would both be equally sensible about.

You need to make your expectations clear to your employer. She won't object as they are perfectly reasonable all round. Don't be apologetic or beat about the bush - be polite and clear.

Yes, ask her - make it in her favour - "when the kids are ill, I'd like to spend lots of time with them doing quiet things. If your aware they are ill, please could you drop me a line, and I'll try and find alternatve care for DS so I can concentrate on your kids"

I will need to have a word.. (nextphase that's a great idea thanks)

Im just at a point where im finding it upsetting. When my son is sick I fight back the tears leaving him somewhere else in the morning. .hes my baby and I should be caring for him...but I know how damn lucky i am to have my job so go to work to look after someone else's children. Im not complaining as such..its just hard as a mother you know....so to come into work and have it casually dropped into conversation like it doesn't even matter that they've been sick/persistent temperatures etc.. knowing its almost inevitable we'll get it too makes me cross. ..whoops..turning into a wee rant there lol

Difficult. I can see your concern however your OP seems to suggest in one part that if their kids are ill, it is not for you to deal with and they should take time off (?apposed to one or two days off for them to help child get better?). One of the benefits of having a nanny as opposed to using a nursery or childminder, and hence shelling out the high additional cost, is that the normal illnesses (and I include the likes of stomach bugs in this) are something that you can expect a nanny to deal with rather than have to take time off work.

So I?d speak to them but put it very much in terms of wanting to know so as you can see whether you should try and make alternative childcare arrangements for DS to allow you to focus on the charges and also prevent it spreading to your DS. But bear in mind that kids who are fine at bedtime may in the morning be ill so it would be unrealistic to always expect prior notification.

Oh no..I totally understand and its not a case of it not being my responsibility, as they are my charges andbit is my job to care for them after all...to put it into context the illnesses so far have been quite extreme, and have left the children absolutely distraught and inconsolable for the majority of the day because they just want mum,and on one ococcasion ended in me spending my weekend throwing up...going back to work Monday and passing it back to them ((awful! ))

I do know children decline suddenly, but again these occasions have been open to much earlier notice iyswim. persistent temperatures the previous day for example.

I dunno. I know that its tricky. .I do. I just think a 'hey..x has a slightly high temp and isn't quite themselves, just to give you a heads up for tomorrow x' would be all im asking. I just feel like I've arrived numerous times to parents darting out the door, having left an obviously poorly child on the sofa!

As a mother, I sympathise. Yet, as a working parent I am inclined to take your employers' side. First of all, if the children do seem poorly in the evening there is always hope that they will sleep it off and will be fine in the morning. So alarming the nanny might seem unnecessary. The parents may also worry - since you are bringing your DS with you - that you will decide not to come for the fear of him contracting the disease. I know you may never have given them this idea - although you kind of sound very sensitive about it in this thread - but when you work full-time and so does DH you want to make sure that you will make it to work, i.e. that the nanny will defo turn up to take care of the sick child. I agree though that this is an unfortunate situation for you and your LO.

It is heartbreaking leaving a poorly child behind to go out to work - as you know first hand! - but when you see your bosses "darting out the door" they are probably cursing everything that comes to mind that they are forced to do so. And dealing with distraught children in their absence is your job as a nanny - however hard it is...

Hope you sort it out with your employers!

It's a hard one! I guess however that I also sit on the side of the parents. If your ds went to childcare then there would also be no warning that there is a sick kid there! Kids in that pre school age just seem to often go from one lurgy to another. Daycare colds, vomiting, d and v... The list is endless.
I guess I'd think you are very lucky being able to take ds to work, certainly not something as an employer I'd be happy with.