CM club - what is your standard answer to 'I could never do that job...'

[blueberryupsidedown]

I have been CM for a while now and I have heard that comment so many times, from women (mostly women with some kind of high flying career) who reply 'Ohhh I couldn't ever do your job' when I tell them what I do for a living. Last week a friend of a friend even said to me, in front of other people, 'I could never change someone else's child's nappy'... Here are some of the things I sometimes reply, but I am interested in what you say, if anything, when you come across that kind of comment:

• it's quite fun actually, getting to play with kids all day
• well I haven't heard that one before
• It's not that hard
• I know, it does take a special set of skills and not everyone has it
• I like working with children, it's probably because they are not judgmental

It's not a nasty question, I don't get offended anymore by other women saying this, but hey, just thought I'd ask if I'm the only one who occasionally gets irritated...

I just say

Don't worry I couldn't do your job either!

I'd say "Never mind - you can't be good at everything"

I used to be a childminder and this used to drive me crazy, I ended up saying "No, I don't think you could either..." and then change the subject, it drove people mad not quite knowing what I meant...

I hate it when people say that. I never know what to say.

I sometimes feel like saying well I've made 130 quid today what've you made?

I've been a bit down with the job and I think in part it stems from people's attitudes. However today one of my newish mindees (2) has run into my arms after a 3 week break. And another brought me a flower from his garden. its the little things that make it worthwhile and the £130

People arent necessarily putting you down! It's just that it's a very specific job which you would have to want to do, like chiropodist, long distance truck driver, etc.

I have said that to my childminder, I meant it as total respect for what a fantastic job I think she does and how she is so in control and calm. I am worried now that she may have thought I meant it in a demeaning way, is noted and will never say it again.

I usually say - nor could I without the alcohol and drugs......

Then wait and hope they laugh (although not joking much about the alcohol)

It is something that people say a lot, but that there is a world of difference in the way people say it. When someone says "I couldn't do your job, Couldn't bear to be mopping snotty noses and wiping dirty bums all day", that is a completely different matter to those who say "I couldn't do that. Where do you get your patience and energy and all your great ideas?". I think it reflects how people think about their children = if you think caring for them is a rubbish job you are probably not the greatest parent.

I couldnt be a hair dresser or anything to do with feet! Each to their own i say

I think it is almost alwsys meant as a compliment. Parents know what hard work it is - surely it's just a v British way of saying "I really appreciate the work you're doing".

Yes it is probably meant as a compliment most of the time. But there is the odd time it isn't. And you can tell by the tone it is said in.

I've been doing the school run to our primary school for 12 years so am quite well known.
People usually say " I don't know how you do it" (as I'm dropping 7 kids off)-my usual answer is " I just drink a lot!". Most of them laugh and say " I don't blame you!" but I did say it to one person and she just looked at me, stony faced.She obviously didn't get the joke!...was expecting Ofsted to call after that!

I think most people say it in a condescending way. I like the idea of saying ' no I don't think you could'.

I usually just tell people what a fantastic job it is.

I have said it, in total admiration.

Like the poster above, meaning where do you get your patience, energy, great ideas from.

I hear this a lot. Especially after they've asked how many I look after and I reply 14 !!

I have never been offended by it...maybe I've been accepting compliments where they weren't intended

I usually say "there's never a dull moment!" with a big smile as I rush off!

People say this to me a lot, and I've NEVER taken it as a slight, it's a compliment fgs.

Anyway. I can't do it either which is why I'm giving up after five years. The impact on my family and sanity has become too much.

I just say, "It's a great job. I get to play all day. "

I got this a lot too and when people said something like 'I don't know how you do it', I'd usually reply 'I wouldn't be able to without my nightly Stella!' Those who knew me well (in particular the parents) would laugh. I can't say I ever had people say it in a way as to put me down, they seemed to genuinely have respect for being able to look after so many children at once, often commented on me being like the pied piper with 7 well behaved children walking one by one in a line. Now all my comments are asking me where all the children are (no longer minding)!

As someone with a supposedly "high flying career", I find it quite depressing that some CMs would assume the "I couldn't do your job" to be a put-down.

I used a fabulous CM for years for DD (while at law school) and honestly couldn't have done it without her, and told her so frequently. We are still friendly. I definitely couldn't do her job, but I was v grateful she did it so well.