I have a two and a half year old boy, who has been with the same childminder for nearly a year. He is there for one morning a week and has loved it and used to ask to go everyday but the last month he has been extremely upset about going and extremely upset when I have come to collect him. In the last week he stopped playing, has become quite withdrawn and all he wants to do is cuddle Mum, he doesn't want to leave the house. Usual things like going to the park he doesn't want to do.
In the car on Friday he told me that "name of childminder makes me sad" I asked why does X make you sad? He then hit himself across the head and said she says "shut up, shut up" The next day I did a role play with him where he Bob (not real name) Giraffe go to X the childminder played by a toy monkey. Here he showed himself as the Giraffe crying and the childminder toy saying "shut up, shut up, Mummy isn't here" then acted out the hitting and asked if he could go home. He has also used phrases such as "no one will believe you" in connection with her.
I am very shaken by all of this. We have taken him out of the childminders care with immediate effect, My husband contacted her to say our child had being telling us things connected with his stay with her that had concerned us greatly and was she aware of anything that had happened to him whilst in her care. She replied No and that she was hurt and upset by that. She later texted at 1am saying he had got cold whilst out walking which seemed bizarre.
Over the last month when I have gone to pick him up and he has been upset she has given me a different reason for it..first week it was because he feel asleep and woke up and thought I was going to leave him there, the 2nd week it was he is going through a developmental stage, the following week it was he has only child syndrome, the next he has no attention span, and finally bring him tomorrow when I have no other children as he is jealous of the other children. Which I believe is when he got hit. Though I feel it was not a one off.
She has an immaculate ofstead report, other Mums I know whose children go there have not expressed any concerns and like I say till this last month I have had no reason for concern. When I picked up my child this week the childminder seemed tired and impatient, he was hungry and had been out walking and was cold and upset. She told him he was making a horrible noise in front of me and to stop. And when I said I think he is cold she snapped at me and told me "he was alright." I felt uncomfortable with the way she spoke to him infront of me and her negativity. In the past she has always been so positive about him. For his age he is well behaved child, he is also very articulate and social for his age. My gut says something is wrong. She came to our house when I didn't bring him this week to check on him and he hid and looked frightened. When her name is mentioned he becomes distressed.
Do I report her? I am perfectly aware that this is her living and the possible implications of this, but my instinct and my child tell me something has gone wrong.