Nanny, CM or nursery?

[IceNoSlice]

Currently on mat leave with DC1, going back to a demanding, long hours job (hopefully) 4 days a week in the late summer. I am hoping to have DC2 fairly soon, maybe only back at work 6 months minimum.

I've met a lovely lady at one of my baby/toddler groups who is a nanny PT with 2 families - she does 3 days with one family, 2 days with another. One of these arrangements is due to finish soon as the child will go to school. I would love for her to look after DS.

But:

1. I am hoping to only go back to work for a short time before having DC2 and it doesn't seem fair to take her on for a short period
2. We couldn't afford to keep her on 2 or 3 days when I'm on mat leave with DC2
3. I would put DS in nursery for the days she is with her other family.

Should I put DS in nursery? Would you take in a PT nanny position in these circumstances?

Sorry, also meant to ask: would a CM be a better option?

DC2 isn't a factor at the moment as they don't exist. Unless you are pregnant now, you don't really know how long it will be before DC2 comes along.

If your job fits with nursery hours, then nursery or childminder sound like viable options for care of just one child. A nanny would be a very costly form of childcare for just one child, even with 2 children it can be an expensive option.

If you become pregnant and then not need childcare for a period of time, any form of childcare will still need paying (in full, or maybe a retainer fee) if you wanted to hold your DC1s place open. For all options you would need to give notice to leave if you decided not to use childcare whilst on maternity leave. So I'm not sure any option is more suitable in respect of being able to restart it again after maternity leave if you are not intending to continue paying during maternity leave.

Tempting as it is to use someone you like and trust, I would say that two or more care regimes/settings is a situation to be avoided if at all possible. Routine and continuity are so important to most children and whereas if forced into such a situation I would hope my child would cope, it's not something I would choose to risk. I also agree that it would be unfair to take someone on knowing you were either already pregnant or hoping to be imminently - unless you are open about this of course and they are okay with a short term post.

I think the nanny/nursery combination sounds perfect, you do never know how long it will take you to get pregnant.

Personally I would never put a young child in nursery full time, its a very long day for them and for you - nursery pick up when you're tired at 6.30pm and still have to get home and get settled is hard every day. Its much better to have a couple of days with the nanny and then some at nursery.

I completely disagree with the above poster, I think a change of scenery is good, there's pros and cons with each sort of childcare, but if you have the luxury of finding both fit in with your work then its perfect.

If you can afford to do nanny and nursery combination then it sounds good, or indeed a nanny / childminder combination. Can you afford the nanny though? 2 Day A Week Nanny (20 hours) cost example - cost came to nearly £15,000 - it is just an example though so the actual cost involved will depend on various factors including salary on offer and hours worked.

I was coming at this from a 'would it be fair to the nanny' POV. With it being 6 months away, I haven't done all my homework on it yet really. I think the comparative costs will be very important and nannynick's point about how a nanny would be an expensive option is likely to make it too expensive. Which is a real shame because she is really very nice. I will just have to keep my fingers crossed that she becomes available sometime in the future when (fingers crossed) I have two DC.

No it's not very fair to know that the job will end at a known future point and not tell the nanny about that at application stage. However there is not a known future point in your case at present as DC2 has not been conceived.

Nanny jobs come to an end due to all sorts of factors, children going to full time school is a typical example, though even then a nanny may still be a viable childcare option as other forms of childcare may not be available or be open the hours required.

As a nanny I can not predict when a job will come to an end. I've had two employers go on maternity leave and they both kept me on during that time. So mum going on maternity leave does not always mean that the nanny job ends.

Thanks for that example nanny cost calc, very useful. I guess that, even before the additional costs, at £11 ph (£110 per day) this is a lot more than nursery for one child (around £45-£50 per day around here).

As an aside, is there a limit on how many children of certain ages that nannies can look after? Eg if I had three under 2s (my friend has a 18mo and newborn twins) would this be too many?

Yes, though she may not be wanting a salary of £11 gross an hour. She may want more, or less. Though it would be up to you as the employer to decide what salary you were offering for the job and then see if applicants accepted the job based on that salary level. Maybe ask her about how much she gets paid as a nanny, never know she may tell you.

No there is not a limit on number of children for whom a nanny can care. There is an insurance limit (some insurers set this at 6 children, aged 0-16) but that only applies if the nanny has public liability insurance and the figure may vary between insurers.

Three under 2's would be hard work but it's doable, some nannies may care for triplets or even quads, so all children the same age. However you would need to look at the practical side of things - how they would travel around and what housework duties would be reasonable I expect are things that would need some thought.

Thank you so much for you help, much appreciated.