Active discussions

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Original poster

I've had an awful start to childminding

25 replies

loulou5 · 16/04/2006 14:15

Hi everyone, i'm pretty new to childminding and have not had a good start.
I've just had to give a letter to one of the parents about payments being late, not being paid in full on the correct day, and having to ask for my fees Sad.
I feel terrible about having done this so formally but i have already tried to tell her that i wasn't happy, but she still continued with late payment's etc.
I also put in the letter that if this continued i would have no choice but to give written notice to end contract. It's sounds harsh i know, but i not received one single payment for the correct amount or on time since i started minding.

I have to face her tomorrow knowing that she has read the letter, any advice from anyone would be gladly received.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Set a reminder
MagicGenie · 16/04/2006 14:30

Loulou - if you've never received correct payments at the right time, I don't think you need to feel guilty. If this parent was leaving her child at a nursery, she'd be getting prodded by them - why should you do differently just because her child is coming into your home?

If you'd had some sort of explanation or apology about what the problem was, (i.e. your fees being due at the end of the month when things are tight for her), you might be able to cut her some slack but presumably you haven't had this...?

You could ask whether there's anything you can do to help the situation (i.e. change the date when your fees are due).

Has she expressed any dislike in how you look after her child? (Not that that should stop her from paying). You never know, it might be worth asking.

If neither of the above apply, stick to your word and encourage her to find someone else.

Original poster
loulou5 · 16/04/2006 14:55

On a previous conversation with her, she said she was happy with the care i provided. She does however constantly come up with one reason or another not to pay, eg/ other debts, car loans etc... I have taken financial issues on board and let her spread one particulaly high payment out, but then she didn't even pay me the reduced amount in full!
I know she will be upset about letter, and can't help feeling guilty. face to face i'm a big softy, where as a letter i can say what i truly feel. I'm just scared that tomorrow i'll soften, when i speak to her, and then be really mad with myself!

I want to stick my ground, but at the same time be fair (if u know what i mean)

OP posts:
edam · 16/04/2006 14:59

Ok, think of your key points (such as you've been late with every payment/if you don't pay me on time I'll have to terminate the contract) and just repeat them like a mantra tonight and tomorrow before she arrives. Burn them into your skull so you don't just cave in the second she turns up!

FWIW I think you are being more than reasonable. This is your living, not a favour you are doing for her.

Original poster
loulou5 · 16/04/2006 15:21

Okay, thx for advice...just hate these kind of situations Sad, and never expected to come across this on my very first experience of childminding.
I have another child starting after the easter hols, so hopefully this will go alot smoother.

OP posts:
pupuce · 16/04/2006 15:22

There are parents who always take the piss... if you don't stand your ground she will do it again and again....
Is her child's care not important to her ? If she values your work then she should pay you.
If she was minding your child, would you like it if you always paid late ? Ask her how SHE would feel!

Original poster
loulou5 · 16/04/2006 15:29

These are some of the points I put in the letter to her, along with others, and feel i took a proffessional approach to the situation, but one of my weak points is dealing with people face to face when it comes to disagreements, or complaints.

I tend to listen to their argument and normally find myself sympathising with them.

OP posts:
pupuce · 16/04/2006 15:31

That's bad business Wink

TwoToTango · 16/04/2006 16:07

I'm not a childminder but I think it is a terrible way to treat you. If I was happy enough with someone to entrust them with looking after my ds the least I could do would be to pay them in full and on time - after all you are running a business and I don't suppose the parent would like it if THEIR employer was late with their salary at the end of the month. Good luck with sorting it out and try not to feel guilty - you are in the right.

Original poster
loulou5 · 16/04/2006 16:20

thx for support everyone.... will let u know what happen's tomorrow!

OP posts:
ayla99 · 16/04/2006 19:11

HAve you tried charging a late payment fee? Eg, £5 per day until the arrears are cleared. Usually helps most parents to remember their chequebook!

I also let parents pick the payment day or date so that they can pay me when their salary has just gone in.

lemonstartree · 16/04/2006 20:17

FWIW I completely agree that you should NOT feel guilty.

this is taking the p*ss. Its your business

you sick to your guns , be polite but firm and if it does not improve, give notice like you said you would

GOOD LUCK :)

chipmonkey · 17/04/2006 00:17

My children go to a creche and I have to confess that I am sometimes late with payments, usually down to lack of organisation on my part as my days vary from week to week and sometimes I "feel like its Thursday" when its actually Friday. They don't complain because I will always pay them the next working day and they know I'm good for it. And I do pay the right amount! However, if my children were going to a childminder rather than a creche, I would be super-vigilant about paying on time. That money is going towards food and bills and that person's life! Once or twice my salary has been late and it wasn't funny. Would never inflict that on anyone else.

LoveMyGirls · 17/04/2006 08:17

Please let us know how you get on, im new tochildminding too and am waiting for my first mindee and would be interested to see how you get on, good luck!!

Tan1959 · 17/04/2006 14:23

Loulou5; you can still listen to parents, take on board what they say and sympathise but stick to your guns and be firm - this is your living you are earning after all Smile

scotlou · 17/04/2006 14:45

Can you suggest she pays you by standing order? I did this with my CM and it was great for both of us. We just worked out the total annual cost (once holidays etc deducted) and split it into 12 monthly payments. ANy extra days were paid separately. Mind you, my ds went for same hours every week, which made things easy.

doobydoo · 17/04/2006 14:51

poor youSad..awful to be pushed into this sort of situation.I expect if she wasn't paid on time for the work she does she would be quick to complain.I t does sound like you have been reasonable.The suggestions for a standing order are good...or direct debit whichever can't be cancelled easiest.Good Luck.

Original poster
loulou5 · 17/04/2006 15:14

Hi everyone, some good suggestions here from u, thankyou.

She came this morning, and it wasn't a nice atmosphere at first, especially because I thought she would start talking about the letter straight away, but she didn't, so I had to.

I just started 'About the letter i sent you!'
And then really just explained why i had wrote the letter and reinforced the issue of payments.

She did apologise for offending me, and we agreed a new payment day which suits her better, and we seem too have sorted it out (fingers crossed).

She did make me feel guilty though for doing it so formally, but i explained that I didn't feel that i had a choice, as we had already disscussed issue of payments before.

I feel like i have done the right thing and am so glad i stood my ground.........phew Smile

OP posts:
lucykate · 17/04/2006 15:15

stick to your guns on this one, she wouldn't expect to go into asda to get some shopping and ask at the checkout if she can pay next week would she?!. and yet she's doing it with her most precious posession, her child!.

Original poster
loulou5 · 17/04/2006 15:18

That's so true Lucykate.....makes u wonder doesn't it!

OP posts:
doobydoo · 17/04/2006 17:39

WELL DONE hope it all works out from hereonSmile

Original poster
loulou5 · 17/04/2006 22:59

Thx doobydoo......i'll find out on next pay day!

OP posts:
else1196 · 24/04/2006 09:55

Paying tax for an after school nanny

We employ an after school nanny from Slowakia for 3 hrs per day? Do we have to register her and pay tax?

jellyjelly · 24/04/2006 09:59

Was that ament to be a new thread?

diddle · 24/04/2006 10:02

loulou5 - I would find this situation very difficult too, nobody lieks dealing with money issues, btu what you need to remember is that thsi is your business, and your income. If she is employed then she will totally understand that if it were happening to her, and her wages were incorrect she would be doing the same as you.
This is your business, and you have bills to pay the same as she does.

Say strong, hope its goes or has gone well.

diddle · 24/04/2006 10:13

loulou - sorry lazy me didn't see your post this morning. well done to you for sticking to your guns, thats excellent.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page