Au Pair Angst going on upstairs - I am wearing my judgy pants

[NormaStanleyFletcher]

A neighbours Au Pair has come to see mine. She is under 18 years old, has been here just over a week, and is being expected to look after a 2 year old and a 5 year old. The 5 year old from 8-9 and from 3.15-5, but the 2 year old ALL DAY. Plus cleaning. for 60 quid a week. She is leaving as she is getting criticised for her work.

They are havvin a larf.

They should be paying a nanny for that kind of hours.

Shouldn't they?

My au pair does get up, drop off and pick up, simple cooking or re-heating 3-4 days a week. Usually 3 days a week. I pay 90. I am flexible, she is flexible. She does not do much cleaning.

Oh and if you are the mum and you happen to be a MNer, I think YABU expecting that much of an au pair. Sorry, but I do

Sounds like a nanny role to me, are the parents out at work all day?

Yes, she is being taken for a ride. Poor kid.

The parents are out at work all day, yes

Poor girl has told them that when she goes back for Christmas she will not be returning, but she has already bought her return ticket for 4th Jan, and so is looking for another more reasonable family in the new year.

Maybe you could link her up with Newtothisstuff? She's looking for a new au pair (on the lazy au pair thread).

She wants to stay near oxford. Will look for lazy au pair thread - thank you

Oh - and she can't drive - so no good Newtothisstuff

I'm looking for one a bit older too.. Thanks tho.. The family are being vu tho your right

Poor girl :( she is certainly being taken for a ride and very unfair

The mum obv wants cheap childcare - for a nanny Doing all those hours that would cost the mum at least 6 times that if not nearer 9 or 10 by the time she's calculated a gross wage

Hope the ap Finds a nice family that won't exploit her asap

I would take her on - my au pair is leaving at Christmas, but I already have another Spanish girl lined up.

She has raised the rate with the mum, who has just told her it is all they can afford.

Outrageous exploitation but unfortunately not unusual. Can you make a point to your neighbour by offering the AP somewhere to stay when she comes back?

Unfortunately not. We have no room at all.

Is that legal??!Those hours for that money?

I feel really sorry for the AP. This must be your neighbours 1st au pair?

That's ridiculous. The family are economising (dangerously) and whilst it's technically legal it's exploitative and shouldn't be. They need a nanny.

Poor girl :(

I pay my childminder more than that for less hours

It is not their first au pair. The last one left a couple of weeks ago because she was so unhappy with the arrangement.

Brownie, au pairs will pretty much always get less than childminders, as they get housed and fed on top.

That is pure exploitation!

The poor two year old! "Dangerously economising" is right.

I wonder what they tell people the terms are before they arrive. THey won't get anyone to stay for longer than five minutes. Seriously I really worry about those children.

'I pay my childminder more than that for less hours'

One cannot compare the service a childminder and an aupair provides at all.

Poor girl, I hope she finds another family who appreciate (and pay!) her properly.

Neighbours au pair has asked my au pair if she can stay here for a few nights before she leaves

I have no room.

Oh, poor girl!

It must be so tough being so young, in a foreign country, and being exploited. Good for her for being assertive and refusing to just accept such a bad situation.

Could she stay on an airbed on the floor of your au pair's room? It would be a squeeze, but it would only be for a few nights and I imagine it would save her an awful lot of awkwardness etc. with her host family.

They sound like an awful family. Poor girl. She is very young - any chance she could find something else?

An AP should not have sole charge of an under 3 for long periods iirc....all week!!!! That is something else.

I also feel quite awkward getting involved in somebody elses stuff. I don't know the mum, but we live in a closed community (military base) and her little boy goes to the same tiny school as my dd.