Can you hold my hand? On the verge of hiring my first nanny and having a freak-out!

[FlopsyMopsyCottontail]

I need a 2 day per week nanny for my kids. She would be doing a bit of school run, a bit of babycare and a bit of housekeeping. I have found a lovely girl who works for friends of ours three days a week. She can do our days, is happy with the duties, she is OFSTED registered, CRB checked, first aid qualified, has experience in a nursery and a creche and then nannying for 3 years. The kids like her, I like her, we find it easy to chat. She strikes me as honest, hard-working etc. References are fine.

But on the verge of sealing the deal, am having a total anxiety attack. I am not sure why - its not just one thing. I don't think its about her really. I think its more about the change in our lifestyle/routines and the unknown elements.

Is this kind of anxiety normal? What shall I do to work through it?

I told her I was having a wobble today and whilst I tried to make it clear that it was not about her, I think I might have scared her off or made her think that we dont want her...arrgh. Although I am sure we do. Am I being an idiot?!Whats wrong with me?

Yes it's normal- I was a bloody nightmare checking on all sorts of things and panicking when left my pfb with first nanny. But have got over it and never regretted it as a good nanny is a massive enhancement to your children and your life.

It will feel awkward at first but give it time and don't feel shy to discuss /suggest ideas on what is or isn't going well just as you would with someone who works for you in your wohm role.

Thanks Gigondas. Not just me then. Makes me feel marginally better.
Am mortified by my behaviour!

I found having a nanny completely different from nursery - it felt much more of a wrench leaving my children with the same person, in my own home, on their own than it did leaving them at the door at the nursery.

I always hated living in shared houses though as a student and I'm not the kind of person that has loads of visitors at home so I think I just found it a bit weird having someone in the house and looking after my children.

I got used to it after a while I suppose, but I still preferred the 'distance' you got with a nursery/parent relationship really. The nanny was lovely, btw, and we are still in touch, but I think these kinds of feelings are completely normal.

Or possibly I'm just an antisocial weirdo

Maybe she just isn't right? I don't have a nanny, but I do use babysitters and there are ones I feel completely at ease with (and whom DD loves) and there are others that I will only use in emergencies! Plus of course those I have never used again!

Yes, it's normal. It's also normal to find the first two or three months with a nanny quite unsettling ime, so do give it time, because she sounds great!

I don't have any personal experience but I think your wobble sounds completely normal. Change is a big thing and you're not an idiot for having these feelings, you're human. Your nanny sounds brilliant. Good luck!

Aw thank you. I'm calming down a bit now!