Childcare with a commute

[GingerDoodle]

I appreciate this may have been done to death but I would appreciate peoples thoughts:

My and DH both commute; I will obviously be off over my maternity leave but will be going back. We leave at 7am, get home 6:30. Timings / jobs not really flexible for either of us.

Childcare wise, will be going back sometime between 4 and 8 months. Nursery's near home don't open early / shut late enough so I am guessing it would be a combination of nursery + childminder. The only nursery I have contacted so far sent me a shirty message about it being negative to leave your child in care for so long (thanks I already feel great about that one).

Alternatively my work has a very good nursery attached which is subsidised so financially a good option. The downside would be commuting with a baby - I have no problem with other commuters turning their noses up but am contemplating the logistics. I normally get a seat and the walk is pleasant once in London.

This would hopefully only be a scenario for a year or so until my folks move more locally.

Anyone who was / is in a similar position care to share their experiences?

Thanks!

I earn £50k and there's no bloody way I can afford a F/T nanny. Once my student loans, travel card, pension, mortgage and bills are paid I have £600 a month to buy food, clothes, petrol etc. This isn't a whine, I'm very lucky to have a good job and a nice house, just saying that I couldn't afford a nanny. I have no idea who can tbh.

Anyway, back to the point, I have often commuted with DD1. We both really enjoyed it, and I would far rather have the kids nearby than far away. It's less fun with both kids, as the pushchair becomes a necessity, but if you can carry LO then it's easy really. I just used to whack her into the Connecta, grab my bag and go. If you're lucky enought to have a subsidised nursery, USE IT ;)

What I meant is it costs £50k of gross income to pay for a full time nanny. Not that people earning £50k can afford one

Hi there - I was in a similar situation and my daughter is now with a childminder. There were several who were willing to have her for long days (despite stating their hours as 8-6pm in their profiles). Have you registered with childcare.co.uk? I wouldn't try to do a nursery/childminder combination as I think that would complicate the situation, confuse your child and you may have to pay the childminder for the hours where your child is in nursery anyhow.

My daughter had been in nursery before and so I was keen for her to continue in a social environment . I found a childminder who works alongside her sister - it's like a mini nursery.

I did interview a couple of nannies but the additional cost was too much.

I also tried doing my commute with her as there is a nursery at work. She screamed and tried to lie on the floor by the train toilet - I could feel everyone tutting at me and it wasn't even rush hour. You may have thicker skin than me though!

Best of luck. It will work out and you've plenty of time to sort it out

I would try commuting to start with, purely because baby will be close to you during the day - but honestly - I dont think you'll both be able to stick it out in the long term - I may be wrong. I hope I am. Its impossible to say until baby arrives.

I had to leave my job when DS1 was born. There was no way I could commute with him either in a car or on public transport - he would have screamed the place down, puked everywhere and generally have been a very very unhappy baby. We had no CM options nearer home with those hours so I found a new job. Eventually DH also found a new job close to home too as he couldnt bear not seeing DS1 during the week.

As some people have said though - they manage it fine. You get extra time with your little one and they with you. Smashing.

So I would do your research - there may not be any CM available anyway at this point. Get DCs name down for the creche near your work.

Pray you get an angel baby LOL!

I would say that no matter what child care you go for you should try to delay your return for as long as humanly possible, and bear in mind that almost all babies do get sick in nurseries - sniffles, conjunctivitis, D&V, chickenpox, and other miscellaneous viruses and you ideally want to delay that until your baby is a bit less tiny. Nurseries are stricter about taking sick children than CMs, and nannies are more flexible than either (though that's irrelevant if you can't afford one), but either way save up as much holiday as possible for emergency sick cover, find the number of a good emergency nanny agency and set up working from home if at all possible.

There is some persuasive but not definitively probative research suggesting that long hours of group care are really not great for babies (up to 2 or 3 depending on number of hours) and that they are better off with sole consistent carers - ie parent, childminder or nanny. I never mention it on threads where people don't have a choice but I think you might want to look into it; it makes a lot of sense to me from my experience of having a baby in nursery, albeit for shorter hours. To some extent it depends on the staff turnover at your nursery.

But your specific choice is a very 40 hours in nursery vs 60 hours with childminder, and to that extent I think I'd go for the 40 hours nursery, but postpone for as long as possible - can your DH take his parental leave entitlement?

Personally, I would register with a nursery near work as back up and spend my mat leave trying to arrange a childminder or a nannyshare with another family. The latter can work out really well especially if you have long hours or need flexibility to be able to work late at short notice/train issues. Your child will either already be at home, or can be taken there at the end of the day and the costs split between two families are not much more than a city nursery is going to cost.