CM Club since its a day for problems with parents,can i add mine?

[saltire]

Following on from hellybellys thread about parents arriving early, i have the opposite problem.

I have two boys, sometimes i have them every day, some weeks just one or two days depending on fathers shifts.

They are supposed to arrive at 8.30am, which gives me time to get them organised before leaving the house at 8.45/8.50 for school. However most mornings recently she has been late, some mornings she has never turned up and i've hung around until the last possible minute before going to school, only to find her sitting in the car waiting for me when i get back.
Other times we are all outside, and she sails down the path at 8.45 with out even a "sorry". She then proceeds to take boys into house, we all have to go back in again. Then i get
"heres their lunch, its spaghetti hoops, and a tin of chicken soup, you just put it in a pan and heat it".
Then we have lots of
"bye bye , mummy loves you, mummy won't be too late in picking you up, mummy loves you, mummy misses you, kiss kiss kiss" to both children then she goes! By which time it's usually 8.55And we then have to get the boys in the buggy, and get off to school.

I have asked and asked if she can be on time as i need to get to school quickly, and she says she will try the next day, and she does, by turing up at 8am. However after a couple of days of being on time she reverts back to being late again. I really don't know what tactics to try next to get her here on time.
I asked her once why she was late and her reply was this
"Well i got Xand Y up at 6.30 and bathed them and gave them their breakfast, but X didn't want his and i thought i'd let him have a wee play with his toys before i tried again, but he still wouldn't eat it, so i have been sitting at the table trying to coax him to eat some breakfast"
She never makes any apologies for being late either
It means that most days we are late for school which isn't fair on my two, or the other boys i have some days.

Does anyone else have a problem with parents being late? and if so how do you overcome it. I've never had this bfore, most parents are anxious to be here on time.
Sorry it's a bit long.

I have had this too. Do not go back into the house. Take food from her and put under buggy. Get her in for a chat and tell her you will wait outside until x time and then you have to go.Dawdle on way home and i bet she gets the message pretty quick.I alwayys tell mine to phone if they are going to be late and i can meet them at school nursery etc.If they don't phone i just go and i see them when i get back. Parents used to do this to me all the time and it took me yrs to toughen up. be brave and get het sorted out!!!

Agree with agalch. Just set off at 8.45 as normal. She has 15 minutes leeway from 8.30 that she should be able to manage. What does she do? Does she work flexi or something?

She works 9.30 am till 5.30 Monday to friday, but the dad works a strange shift pattern, either days or nights, but he sometimes works 12 days in a row, then has 2 off, then works 2 days and has 3 off. very strange.
I shall try tomorrow leaving the house at the usual time and see what happens

Glad you agree Bozza,i think too many minders give parents too much leway. I had a parent who slept in at least once a week sometimes more and he was late by around an hour. I had to cancel a trip one morning and that was the last straw.I told him if he was late in future and i wasn't here to ring me and he could bring child to me,he wasn't late again lol. I often wonder what would happen if i was late picking their kids up from school or if i slept in and couldnt have their kids till an hour after my usual start time?

I used to have one that would just turn up whenever they knew that i done a school run and left and didnt come back so if they werent there by i think 815 i would leave and they would have to pay but wouldnt get childcare.

my late one used to drive me mad.....so now i meet her at the school and so far this has worked.

Have you asked her to meet you at the school. I used to have a parent who would sometimes be late (not their fault as they travelled a long way every day and would sometimes get stuck in traffic). I told him if it was past a certain time then I would leave and meet them outside the school after I had done my drop off. This helped. Also, you didn't mention of they are schoolers or not. If they come back home with you, would it help if you offered to do breakfast for them at your house.

Pickles45. I have offered before to give them their breakfast when we get home from school - i couldn't start it at 8.30 as i wouldn't be out the house on time. I also suggested that she arrive a bit sooner, and i give them breakfast. She said that she felt because she gets them up at 6.30 that going from 6.30 until 9.10am is too long to wait for breakfast.
However, if they aren't eating it at that time, then they are obviously not ready for it

Wonder if it's worth asking her to perhaps give them

juice and yoghurt when they get up and perhaps you could give them something else when you get back from the school run. Could mention it might be less stressful for her in the mornings.

Good luck, very frustrating.

I ensure that parents know what time I have to leave to do the school run. If any of them are ever running late, they usually ring to check if I'm definitely doing school run or when I'd be back - it's common courtesy really and, thankfully, I haven't had a problem. Oh, I am so smug (sorry!!)

My parents also know what time I leave for the school run & if they're late they come & find me on the route or at school. It's not worth them waiting for me to get home afterwards as sometimes I go straight out without going home & might not be back until after 10 a.m.!

The mindee I've had since I started is due to arrive at 8.30am but is always late and quite often it's near 10am, today was 9.20am. At the moment it doesn't bother me as she takes her to pre-school on my school run days so she's not affecting anything. Just wish I knew the days she was going to be on time then I could have a lie in on the other days I have no mindees but her (as I have to be dressed and ready for work just in case!)

Today my new mindee (who started last wednesday - does one day a week) was 5 mins early and dad was 10 mins late collecting. Don't mind small amounts of time but he was 25 mins late last week and I'm thinking if this keeps happening, to change the contracted hours! What do you think?

If they are late next week change the hours, have had to do this to a few parents.

will do! :)

This is why I tend to do my contracts a couple of weeks after mindee has started, so that we all know what the hours are more likely to be. The first two weeks are my "settling in" period, where we can iron out any problems.

Just seen this, agree with Prisoner, have devised interim contract for first weeks covering all evetualities, but in place for 3 or 4 weeks. People find it difficult to estimate travelling times, how long it will take to get ready etc, and others take the p*!! You have to put your business head on and be firm, it's harder dealing with parents than kids, that's the fun part!!