Is my house too small for an Au Pair?

[meerkatmum]

Hello, I am a LP and due to redundancy I am now seeking a new job which could lead to requiring longer childcare that does not suit my current CM. I have to work, so have decided that an au pair may be the best fit for me and my 7 dd, who is very well behaved. But am worried that my 1930?s 3 bed terrace house is too small.

The au pair would have the small room (8?9? x 6?10?). Is this too small? The room can only hold a single bed, single wardrobe and small chest of drawers. Also, I only have one bathroom. Do au pairs expect large houses and a private bathroom? I am happy for the AP to be a member of our small family, and she would be able to share our living room and kitchen as well do.

Does anyone currently have an AP who has a small room, are they ok with this or do I need to move my DD into the small room (her room is 14? x 10?6?)?

I think many au pairs would be very happy with you. Our au pair has a ver small room - about like the one you describe. In order to house her there we put our three children into one room. We do have two bathrooms. But, then we have six people in the house. You may have to organise bathroom shifts in the morning (I.e. you get it first if you are out the door early). But I think that is doable.

I think most au pairs are more interested in location. What is the town / city / village where you live like? How are transport links? Do you have a nice local? Are there other au pairs at the school gate?

Thanks Strix, that's really encouraging to hear. Apart from the small size of 3rd bedroom the rest of the house is spacious so I'm hopeful we wouldn't be overcrowded. Plus I really want an AP who would be comfortable sharing our house with us. Good advice about bathroom, although I suspect I'd always use it first given I wake up early.

We are in North London - Enfield, good shops and open spaces plus close to overground, buses and quite near Oakwood Piccadilly line. Not sure about other AP's - we're new to the area so I'm not very familiar with the school yet.

Did you go through an agency to find your AP, or are websites like AP world ok to use?

Thanks again for your help!

We have our nanny in a smallish bedroom, DS is in with us to make it work. You will find someone who's fine with it.

I'd get yourself clued up on the ins and outs of having an au pair and then decide whether you'd rather have the time and pay and agency or save money but sift through lots of applications, most of which will be crap. an agency is not a guarantee it will work out so no beyond the time saving aspect I don't see any reason to use one.

most of the aupairs prefer a nice friendly family in a small house, people who are sharing their lives with them and care for them as a person and a family member, rather then posh rich families with large houses who dont give a damn about them and wake them up at night to do laundry for example, or make a list of how many toasts it is acceptable to have for breakfast ...
you will be fine! be upfront about where you live and what your expectations are, and you will find someone happy with your 'package' ;))

Yikes catepilarr, do things like that happen? It's suprising that AP's still want to come to the UK if they aren't looked after while here.

I've signed up to skype, written up a profile and am about to begin my search. I don't need anyone until September, so I'm hoping that will give me plenty of time to find someone to join us.

I also think many au pairs would be happy with this but as long as you are honest at the outset, they can decide if it would suit them. We've had au pairs in the past and I would say the main thing is to really welcome them and make them feel part of the family.

Dancergirl, what size house do you have? I've spoken to friends who have friends who have (or have had) au pairs - but they all seem to have large houses in the country. I have yet to speak to anyone who lives in a regular house, such as my 3 bed terrace who has lived with an au pair. Still very keen on the idea, but just worried my lifestyle isn't going to be that attractive!

Remember that many European city dwelling APs will have grown up in a flat. Large houses are relatively unusual!

meerkatmum - it's probably larger than average but in no way a country mansion. We're lucky to have a loft conversion bedroom where our au pair slept which worked well. But prior to this, our au pair had the smallest bedroom which was pretty small but they were happy with this.

Really, I wouldn't worry. The most important thing is how well you treat her and make her welcome. Remember she's a young girl probably living abroad for the first time in a strange country and likely to be homesick at first.

In any case when you look for an au pair, you'll initially speak on the phone/email/skype so before you both make a decision you'll have a good idea of whether she's right for your family and vice versa. You should be honest about the room but don't feel you have to apologise for the room size, just tell it how it is and let her decide. You should discuss how much childcare/housework will be involved, how the hours will be split (most au pairs work a 25 hour week), if there will be any extra work and how you'll pay her for this, what family rules you have, arrangements for meals etc etc.

I'm sure it will be fine. Our au pairs have mostly been lovely and it's been a real help having an extra pair of hands around. Good luck!