mindee has taken a huge step backwards and i dont know what to do

[SkinnyMarinkADink]

I posted a while back about my mindee who wouldn't eat anything with lumps and only jars.

Well i persevered and got him to a stage where he was eating my veg mashed up with a small amount of jar to start him eating. last week he was even eating the 10 month ones with huge lumps and learning to chew. it was great progress and i answer his mum were thrilled.

Cue yesterday he would not eat a single thing apart from his breakfast i did exactly the same as i have been doing but he was just spitting it everywhere and throwing huge tantrums. his behaviour has also deteriorated and is kicking screaming and won't do anything he is asked. he even lashed out at me when i removed him from a disagreement with my dd.

I asked mum if anything different happened at the weekend and she said they were out for most of it so he had only had snacks and chips for his lunches. She gave him jars but was just not interested.

Today has been the same story. although he threw a big tantrum and the bowl of food went everywhere resulting in him needing a wash. he's now asleep in bed.

I really do not know what to do any more i am in early pregnancy and this stress is awful playing on me. i am also

If this child need to learn to tolerate different food from puréed mush it is probably better to concentrate on getting him to eat finger foods. If nothing else his mum would probably find it easier to prepare toast soldiers, etc. than the kind of foods you have been successful with before her regressed.

I wouldn't rule out Autism if I were you. An awful lot of very competent and committed parents end up being blamed for their children's difficulties before they are diagnosed so someone whose parenting skills aren't great is at even more risk of this. Both my DDs have Autism, are very intelligent and met all their milestones early at this age. They were diagnosed years later.

I would try giving the child lots of food to play with. Cold spaghetti, tomato sauce to draw in, different veg to explore and squish between his fingers, etc. without any suggestion that he eats them. That way he will begin to get used to the different textures and smells which will make them easier to eat when the time is right.

You also need to be very, very chilled about the whole process. I can tell that you are feeling cross because you feel that your hard work has been wasted and you need to make very sure that you don't transmit that to the child. Remember to relax, smile and chat about random things while food is around so he doesn't pick up on any negative vibes.

I would also stop sending food home with him. It is clearly not going to get used and this won't help your relationship with the mum. Try to accept the she will make her own decisions and you can't make his home life into what you feel it should be.

It's hard I know when you feel that a child is being let down but don't let this blur the boundaries for you. Make sure he is well cared for with you and, if you have concerns about his welfare while at home, take the appropriate action in line with your child protection procedures.