Childminder etiquette

[Josie5]

hello I am seeing a childminder tomorrow am just wondering what the etiquette is about saying yes or no does one say I am seeing a few and I'll be in touch? Have had no luck finding a nanny and feel a childminder will be interviewing me as much as the other way around? Does anyone know how much a childminder charges? And I presume they won't look after your baby if they are ill?
Many thanks

See what they ask you - I always ask if the parents are seeing anyone else as I think it's a good idea to have a look around to get the best cm. The parents usually say they will ring after they have seen everyone. I charge £40 a day, and no, can't look after your child if I am ill, or if they are ill with something contagious and serious.

You need to ask the cm any questions you have and feel free to say you will get back to them to let them know. Please do let them know either way though. I am a CM and some parents just disappear into thin air after they come and it would be much easier for me to have a definite answer either way.

thank you both for your replies, i will definitely let her know either way, its so hard this childcare business!

When my pfb was born, I prepared this great long list, and thought I'd be interviewing from my shortlist . In reality, you have to find someone who can do the hours you need!
Charges vary quite a bit, partly depending on where you are in the country, partly on the demand in the area, and ultimately because CMs are self employed so can choses their own T&Cs. Remember to look at the whole package though - some may charge all year round and others not charge if they aren't available (holidays), but then their hourly rate might be different. Some might provide more stuff (food, activities, things like wipes) as part of the price, but others might be wanting to bill you separately for things like that. Depending on what hours you want, it might be that some charge per hour, others per day or half day - how will that compare for you.
Don't underestimate travel either - if you've got to drop your dc off and then get off to work, but the CMs is on the otherside of that main trunk road, if can take an age to cross it twice at that time of morning!

thanks backforgood, i wasn't sure about what they would provide in terms of food etc, i am worried my little one won't settle well but i presume we would have some settling in before i leave her. i'll check if she charges per day or per hour

At a first meeting both c/minder and parents get to know each other and discuss requirements. Parents should feel free to ask any questions and the c/m should too to clarify requirements in all areas of care.

c/ms are self employed and most have a contract (if not be careful) which legally binds both parties and where pay (hourly or daily) is clearly stated as are holidays and sickness on all sides. Statutory requirements under the EYFS should clearly be stated
Settling in is a very important part of the care process and parents should feel free to visit other settings to compare before deciding on a c/m or otherwise.
The partnership between c/ms and parents can last for years and should start on a positive note without any doubts and built on trust.

It's as much about getting a feel for if you're comfortable with them and the way they do things, but agree you should find out the whole package before finalising anything. In general CMs will take your child if it's a cold or something, but definitely not if it's a D&V bug. I charge £50 for a ten-hour day (though am currently charging the same for an 11 hour day) so it varies widely.

I'd say look at a few, but try not to string it out too long, or you may set your heart on someone who offers the place to the next family they see, and then everyone else will seem second best (a bit like househunting!).

I also think first impressions are important on both sides, and that they are every bit as telling as the answers to a list of questions as long as your arm. I think it is more helpful (and less likely to put off a likely CM) to try to work out what is important to you and let some of the smaller stuff go. You are unlikely to find someone who does everything the way you would (especially if you are caring for one and they have three or four children's needs to meet) but I would say a love of children and a common sense approach would be top of my requirements list.

Also remember that the prospective childminder may be nervous in the situation - so if she forgets to cover some point that is important to you, do ask, even if you think of it after you get home.

HTH

I agree about not sweating the small stuff. Easier said than done when it's your first, I know, but you can't micromanage someone else's day when you are not there, you have to trust them to make the best decision at the time / for the situation, and, as others say, that comes a lot from the "feel" - not very scientific I know!

Thanks so much for all the comments I met a lovely childminder today but she can't do the days I need! But was great to meet someone who I felt I could trust with my daughter and who genuinely seemed loving and caring.

I think the vast majority of CMs are lovely Josie5
We've worked our way through a few over the years (not fallen out with them, honest - genuine things like moving house or them moving away ) and I meet quite a few through my work now. I've only ever met one that I had my doubts about, and that was more to do with the practicalities of getting the children she needed to, to the places she needed to, not particularly anything about her. I have to say though, that's always what I've found, when you factor in the days /hours you want against the days/hour they can do, you don't always end up with a big choice!

That is often the case with nursery too, though - when I went back to work I was planning to go back Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday. As it turned out those were the most popular days and the nursery was full on those days (there literally wasn't a single place on any day at another nursery that we could get to) so I had to change my days-at-work to Monday, Tuesday and Friday, which was far from ideal. DH and I took it in turns to take Tuesdays off. It's worth bearing in mind if you're returning to work that your work may be able to be more flexible than your childminder!

If you do decide to go for a CM, when you meet, ask the following:
*Does she charge for her holidays and if so, how much
*Does she charge for your holidays and if so, how much
*Does she have a specific school she picks up/drops off (if your DC will be in nursery soon) as if she picks up from one school she wont be able to pick your DC up at the same time from another one

Remember to clarify and if the say they can swap days around if you had to cancel one, make sure its in writing. I had one say that and she lied and denied saying it.

Ask if you can speak with other parents and see how long other parents have stayed. Also, if there are only babies it COULD be they weren't suitable and parents pulled out.