Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Live-out nannies and their lunches

31 replies

bettina46 · 04/05/2012 23:43

I'm a live-out nanny and will start a job for a new family soon. I've been recently asked what I usually have for lunch. In my previous jobs I brought my own lunches from home although my contracts included lunches provided by employers. I simply didn't want to have a toast with marmite for lunch every day. This time I would like my new employers to provide my lunches as everything is getting more expensive and my wages are the same as they were 3 years ago. I will be looking after a baby so I will not have the same food as him. Can I buy my food and ask for a reimbursement?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

HolyCameraConfusionBatman · 05/05/2012 01:47

There's no harm in asking.

I will eat from the family food if they have stuff in that I like, if they don't I'll use money from the kitty to buy something (always within reason of course, I'm not eating cavier for lunch). If we eat out I pay for my lunch out of the kitty money as well. This has all been agreed and works well for us.

giraffesCantDonateBoneMarrow · 05/05/2012 02:30

Can you not just ask them to add some of what you like on shopping list? Eg can you get some ham/cheese etc.

Rubirosa · 05/05/2012 09:39

I think it's cheeky to ask for cash to buy your own lunch. What is wrong with having sandwiches/soup/jacket potato/pasta?

rubyslippers · 05/05/2012 09:41

I offer to buy my nanny some bits she likes or she can help herself to whatever is in the house

Additionally, she has a kitty - she doesn't buy lunch every day from it, but uses when she is out and about

r3dh3d · 05/05/2012 09:42

Our nanny has our Ocado login and puts her stuff on the weekly order when I actually remember to do it. But she's live-in.

LadyHarrietdeSpook · 05/05/2012 09:55

What did you say when they asked what you normally had for lunch? There must be some pasta/jacket potatoes/something for a sandwich etc. It depends what you had in mind. I would just wait and see what's on offer first, if you haven't started the job.

I personally wouldn't approach any discussion with this statement: "This time I would like my new employers to provide my lunches as everything is getting more expensive and my wages are the same as they were 3 years ago."

I see where you're coming from, but it would also not be surprising if they are worried about rising costs too and I think it will get things off on the wrong foot unnecessarily.

nannynick · 05/05/2012 10:03

I often have what the toddler has, for example:
scrambled eggs, peas and toast.
pasta dish of some kind
rice and veg
cheese sandwiches, cucumber and whatever we have baked (cheese and marimte twirls)
Sausage, mash, veg.
Fishfingers, beans, peas, potatos

All that sort of thing, nothing too exciting.

Bonsoir · 05/05/2012 10:05

I think it is perfectly reasonable for a live-out nanny to expect to eat lunch with the children and to eat the same thing as them: soup, pasta, risotto etc. I always did this when my DD was little as I wanted to set her a decent example of sitting down to a shared meal with an adult at least once a day. In the evening I often made her different food to the rest of the family and I got my food highs then!

r3dh3d · 05/05/2012 10:12

I think it's reasonable to buy the same sort of stuff as you would have at home while you are shopping for the baby, and keep that food in the fridge at work and only eat it at work. It's not reasonable to ask your employers to sub your home grocery bill by an amount you decide is equivalent to the cost of the food you bring from home. That's a different thing and I think might technically be tax evasion. Evading a ridiculous piddly amount of tax, but given that the chancellor said in the last budget that he was going to clamp down on illegal payments to Nannies, it's just not worth it.

MrAnchovy · 05/05/2012 10:14

I think it is perfectly reasonable for a live-out nanny to expect to eat lunch with the children and to eat the same thing as them

What, milk and rusks - this is a baby???

It is not reasonable (or allowable for tax reasons) for you to buy lunch and ask for reimbursement, but you could agree with the parents that they provide bread/cheese/salad ingredients for you to make lunch - when your charge gets older of course then you can be eating the same as them, except less mushy!

Bonsoir · 05/05/2012 10:16

Babies start eating soup, pasta, risotto etc for lunch pretty soon! Even if this baby is under six months, there's only going to be a period of months before eating together becomes reality.

Fraktal · 05/05/2012 10:56

I'm with bonsoir - I/nanny eat the same as DS and have done since he was 6 months old. Admittedly he didn't eat much in the beginning and if I had a salad he had a few cucumber sticks, a lettuce leaf to suck on/shred etc but it was essentially the same.

This is the norm for nannies do just explain it and there shouldn't be a problem.

ChippingInLovesEasterEggs · 05/05/2012 11:15

They have asked you what you normally eat for lunch, this - to me - indicates they are intending to make sure those foods are available for you... why not just see how it goes and if there isn't much in that you like, then ask if they can add a few things to the shopping each week.

wishiwasonholiday · 05/05/2012 12:23

I don't see the problem with telling them what you eat for lunch and them put it on the shopping? Is this not why they asked?

mirry2 · 05/05/2012 12:27

Although most people who go out to work (which is what the poster is doing) buy their own lunch.

Iggly · 05/05/2012 13:31

My nanny buys her own unless she takes DS out then she can use the kitty. However DS still has a nap from 1pm. When he stops napping, I'll offer for her to eat with ds if she wants.

Fraktal · 05/05/2012 13:40

mirry most people can nip out in their lunch break and buy something.... plus most people don't have jobs which involve modelling good table manners

mirry2 · 05/05/2012 13:54

Yes, Fraktal, you're right....and i knew somebody would point that out although it seems the op will be looking after a baby so modelling good table manners probably won't be high on the agenda for a while, unless remonstrating about burping, wind and bringing up little bits of sick counts

Fraktal · 05/05/2012 14:21

Mmmm not sure I agree. From 6 months I think it's important that they're sitting at the table and seeing people eating and being enthusiastic about food which comes under the umbrella of modelling behaviour at the table (table manner was poor wording on my part).

mirry2 · 05/05/2012 15:01

Didn't the op say a baby? I assumed she meant one that spent it's time lying down

Fraktal · 05/05/2012 15:22

Depends what you count as a baby. Most people don't go back to work until around 6 months but an under 1 is almost universally referred to as a baby in nanny job ads.

Blondeshavemorefun · 05/05/2012 17:02

tbh most nannies i know who are live out get their lunch provided for them if at work such as sandwich/jacket/beans on toast/salad/pasta etc and if out then use the kitty to buy something 'normal' ie sandwich

why did you bring your own lunch in previous jobs esp if employers said they would provide lunch? surely they didnt expect you to eat marmite toast every day?

sunshinenanny · 05/05/2012 17:17

Many employers are very reasonable about nannies lunch but some are resentful and begrudge it so it is possible that the OP's previous employer did expect her to live off of marmite toast.

in my jobs I've been fairly lucky but did have one where the employer made snide remarks about providing my lunch and I have always eaten with the children or if a tiny baby involved I ate Pasta, Baked Potato, Salad ect.

bbcessex · 05/05/2012 17:26

I think it's a great sign that your family are asking what you have.. I interpret that as "what should we get in for you" (hopefully!).

Our nannies have always been explicitly welcome to eat with the children - lunch has always been ham / cheese / tuna sandwich type things with yoghurt / fruit / crisps - dinner has been bolognaise,stir fry, pizza/salad type things.

I have a live out nanny - I buy diet cokes, cereal bars and yoghurts that I know she likes (because I have asked her) in addition to the usual family stuff which she is welcome to / included in. I also get her a secret stash of biscuits for when the children are out of sight.

I would not be in any way open to reimbursing for own food - if our nanny asked me that, I would be a bit peeved actually.

Karoleann · 05/05/2012 21:16

I wouldn't be happy with my nanny buying something in. She puts things she would like for lunch on the shopping board and has that. It does vary, but it's usually things like bagels with ham/cheese, pasta and salady things. If she's babysitting pizza or fish cakes, noodles etc.

Flip

1 2