Do you really need a personal recommendation for a CM?

[lilysma]

I'm hoping to find a CM for DS, currently 8 months, for when I go back to work 3 days when he's 13 months. DD (now 5) went to nursery which I was never that happy with when she was little and would prefer the more stable attachment that I think little ones get with a CM. However, everyone says to me 'oh, you need a personal recommendation for a CM'. I have asked around and the only recommendations I have had are for people who are just too far away from where we live to make it practical. I have a list of local CMs from the local children's centre and am going through it visiting those with free places who are close enough to us. I'm asking questions, reading ofsted reports and going on 'gut' (including how well they seem to engage with DS when we're there). Is this enough? What do you think?

Ask the childminders if they can provide a reference form a parent. I always volunteer these myself. All my parents (past and present) are happy to chat on the phone to a prospective parent. I would say go on 'gut' first, what you see when you visit childminder, what you hear from parents who used her services and check Ofsted report last. Some childminders are fantastic carers but not so well organised when it comes to paperwork and that would have a big impact on an inspection grade.

We didn't go on personal recommendation because we'd just moved into our village and didn't know anyone with kids when I was pregnant. We wanted to book a CM before our baby was born so we looked at the Offsted reports of the local CMs and visited the 'outstanding' one. Went with gut instinct also. We are very lucky as she is a fantastic CM. Hope you find one. Gut and Offsted worked for us!

As a parent I agree with what apotomak has said. Personally I think 'gut' is everything - if you can imagine this person doing a good job looking after your children they probably will, if you can't they almost certainly won't.

I agree with apotomak. A personal recommendation can really help - especially if you know the person giving the recommendation, and know whether they have the same approach to raising children as you. But, most important - as you've said - is how you feel when you visit the CM; gut feeling is crucial. One thing we did was think about what the most important things were for us about ds (and so what was less important) - for us, it was to do with getting out and about, food, and the CM being generally loving towards ds - and we went through them with the CM, really helped focus the decison. Good luck!

Different cm can be right/wrong for different people, I have a mindee who was really shy, I have a ds the same age and mum commented today that she can't believe the difference in her from her old cm who had older children, also flexibility etc if you need it makes a difference. I'd go with your gut feeling and recommendations of you hear any.

I didn't have personal recomendations for 2 out of the 3 childminders I used - the first time I visited a few - asked for the ofsted reports and references - then I took my DH back to meet the 2 I thought were the best - then went on gut -

Personal recommedation is always a good thing but gut instinct is great!!
A good cm will put you at ease,not worry about you visiting when shes busy/feeding the children/up to her neck in finger paints because thats her natural environment and she shouldnt feel that she needs to put on any airs and graces IYSWIM!!
Most of all,look at how the children in her care are.Are they happy?Relaxed?Content?Enjoying what theyre doing? They can be the best recommendation of all!!

Thanks everyone! Will put your tips to good use...

I would also say go by gut instinct, but also add that if you want to see your prospective CM to engage, play with, hold, cuddle etc your LO, make it quite clear that you are fine with this. Many parents are very ambivalent about their LOs engaging with a stranger, at least at first, and many CMs will try to spare parents feelings by being a little reserved and hands off at a first meeting.

TBH I have used cms on personal recommendation a few times. One was brilliant, one was OK but one was a disaster. I say go on your gut instinct.