Nanny share in south London - questions

[AJH2007]

Hi. A friend and I are about to start looking for a nanny to look after our two baby boys. They will each be ten months old at the beginning of May, which is when we need the nanny to start. We live in south London and we both need four days' care a week. In effect, this means the nanny will work five days a week, but will have both babies 3 days and one baby 2 days. Is this a common arrangement, do you think? The hours are likely to be 8am to 6:30pm (longest).
I'd be grateful for any agency recommendations, plus questions we should be thinking about (e.g. how tax is paid, what sort of activities allowance is needed, etc). Also, if anyone has any practical advice re pitfalls of nanny sharing that would be great!
Thanks in advance!

Some past message threads that may be useful:

When parents employ the nanny jointly

What if one of you has another child?

What if the nanny had their own child whom they brought to work with them?

General search of this part of mumsnet for keyword nannyshare, limited to starting 01/01/2011 - that should give you lots to read

Hmmm Nick that first thread you linked to seemed to meander a bit, I'm not sure it is a great introduction.

From a tax point of view the best set-up is something like this:
The other family employ her for 1.5 days a week, during which she also looks after your child. You employ her for 3.5 days a week, for 1.5 days of which she also looks after the other child. Most reputable payroll agencies will be able to set you up with contracts to suit, although you will probably also need an agreement with the other family dealing with things like coordinating holidays, who provides what for which child when and in who's house etc.

Hi AJH, whereabouts in South London are you? I Can recommend Abbeville Nannies and Nappy Valley Nannies, if you're more towards SE London my friend raves about Tinies SE London (I wasn't so keen on their SW London branch). There is also a local forum called nappyvalleynet (no relation to the agency) where parents and nannies can advertise and it's pretty popular... It's where I found my current nanny(share) position! I am MNing on my iPod while babies sleep but if you want to pm me or wait til later on I can write you a longer post with some tips on nannysharing!

Thanks everyone! I will take a look at those threads and look into the tax /payroll thing. Am sure a payroll agency would be easiest.
Jezebel - I am in Morden and my friend is in Raynes Park. Our houses are about a mile apart. I would love to hear your tips re nanny-sharing; it's a completely new world for me... Thanks for the agency recs.

Some thoughts I had/have had in past (have worked in a few shares during my nanny career)...

Work out where you will be hosting - week about/month about/always at one house? if its not divided equally, make sure you work out costings for food between you. Its bad form to bitch to your nanny that you are providing all the nappies for the other family, sort it out in advance!

Make sure that your parenting approaches are similar - theres no use one of you wanting a nanny who is a firm disciplinarian and the other wanting someone who is laid back and fun. It just doesnt work!

Make sure you schedule in time for a regular review - more regularly at first, less frequently (but still necessary) as the share progresses... It helps to iron out the kinks, raise any issues or concerns, or just tell your nanny shes doing well!

Be aware that two is double the fun but also at times double the work - I went to one interview where they wanted me to go to the other house (the one that wasnt hosting) each week just to do the other childs washing so the parents didnt have to do any. They were several miles apart, I wasnt driving, and I was supposed to fit it in between all the activities they wanted me to do. Be aware that it also might take your nanny a little while to get into the swing of things - i know that with 3 or 4 children to look after, learning the ropes took me a lot longer than if i'd just had one baby.

Try it out for yourself, spend a day on your own looking after both/all the children you will expect your nanny to care for, and do all the jobs you'd like her to do - this way, you have an idea of what her day will be like and an expectation of what is reasonable to ask her to do.

Give a reasonable amount of kitty money - you don't have to go overboard by any stretch, but if you'd like her to do activities and outings (and most nannies will want to), make sure theres enough to cover it. Discuss with your nanny beforehand to find out what kind of outings she'd like to do, what activities you'd like her to do, and go from there. Remember that if theres two of them, and they're not twins/siblings, youre often shortchanged on the sibling discount (SIGH!) so make sure you allow for that too. Dont give her a tenner and then call and ask her to get a weeks worth of shopping.

If you write inclusive babysitting into your contract, remember that you are sharing the nanny - if you each want a nights babysitting a week (I personally go for one inclusive babysit per month per family, but all nanny agreements differ), thats around 8 nights a month that the nanny is giving up to babysit for you, so try not to make them all weekends or they won't get a chance to have a break!

Work out how youre going split the holiday and make sure you give the other family and nanny plenty of notice to take it as their holiday too if necessary, otherwise you may find you've taken all all your leave and your nanny hasnt had all her legal entitlement.

I'm sure I will think of more but thats a start!

Wow, thank you Jezebel that's really helpful!!