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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Expecting twins, have a toddler under 2, advice re child care

27 replies

kanna · 03/03/2012 18:33

My live-out nanny will have returned to States a couple of months after my twins are born in April. I pay £450 for a full 5 day working week. I will be going back to work after 6 months in November, struggling to find best solution for 2yr and 6 month twins at that point. Thought would add an loft to the house and save by having a live in nanny and put 2yr in nursery. I live in SW London. Looking at the threads live in nannies seem not much cheaper, require a car etc and au pairs don't seem to be option as only 25 hours. Any advice with my dilemma would be very helpful. Trying desperately to keep my salary and career maybe it isn't possible.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
HSMM · 03/03/2012 18:46

Would you be better off spending the nursery money on your nanny and her extras?

HSMM · 03/03/2012 18:46

Or his ... sorry nanny nick

lop37 · 03/03/2012 19:30

I don't see any reason you can't employ another live out nanny to look after the twins and your toddler, for 450 a week??? Lots of nannies out there have twins experience!

kanna · 03/03/2012 19:46

Could a nanny really look after twins and a toddler of 20 months seems a big ask. My toddler is a little spoilt she was quite sickly initially, fine now but has had wonderful one to one care. I'm hoping a nursery will be fine as she is quite sociable.

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eeyore12 · 03/03/2012 19:46

Sounds like you need another live out nanny, for the amount you are currently paying you should have no prob finding a twins experienced nanny. It is certainly a job I would look at applying for, how many hours a week would you be looking for? that may have an effect on the wages, if 12 hr days then you may need to pay a little more say £25 a week but I can't see you having a problem finding a nanny for what you are paying now.

looneytune · 03/03/2012 19:52

I don't see why a nanny would struggle with a 2 yr old and 6 month old twins, it might just be a matter of finding the right person. I'm not a nanny but a childminder and this is a fairly normal combination of children for us (I once had 4 under 19 months old!). I'm not sure about the money side of things with nannies but if you have a nanny who you pay that to at the moment then you should be able to find a replacement ok. I'm pretty sure nannies aren't paid a rate dependable on the number of children they look after?

eurycantha · 03/03/2012 19:58

Why should an experienced nanny not be able to do this job ,i look after 5year old twins and their 6 year old brother,I ve been there since the girls were almost two.these are my 6th pair of twins,I have a friend who has also looked after around six pairs plus siblings,It is very hard especially when they are babies but an experienced nanny should be well able to cope.I love looking after twins.[Plus their siblings obviously]

mybootsaremuddy · 03/03/2012 21:15

As somone who also has 3 under 2yrs I can say that a nanny would cope fine.
Ds2 was 14mths when DTs arrivedShock. Our nanny is amazing, twins are 9mth and ds2 is 2 next month. I also have 3 other dc dd1 12yrs, ds1 10yrs and DN 7yrs. Our nanny is fantastic and has been with us for 19mths now(this is her first nanny job as well!). It was great having her there in the early days of the twins as it ment that we could get into a routine and develop stratagies/techniques of making things easy when there was only 1 adult around.

How soon after the birth is your current nanny leaving? Maybe you could employ new nanny to start straight away after this so they can see what you do and if thy are not already in a routine, help you develop one (I have found rouitne VERy helpfull with 3 small ones and dont think I could cope without itConfused).

DS 2 is going to be going to nursery 2 mornings a week after easter (will have just turned 2) this is to give him some time to play with other dc his own age as we feel he misses out slightly with the twins being a 'pair' and our other dc being older. He loves interacting with others at toddler group so we thought it would be nice for him to have some 'his time' without the DTs 'barging in' all the time (it also gives the nanny a bit of a breatherGrin).

kanna · 03/03/2012 21:36

It hadn't even crossed my mind that a nanny would cope as my current one struggles with one. Encouraged to hear you can and busy re-adjusting my plans. great to hear if other mothers or nannies in a similar sole charge role of twins from 6 months onwards and 2 year old

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NannyTreeChelsea · 04/03/2012 01:04

In my nannying day, i cared for 4mth twin girls and their 2.5yr old sister! There are experienced nannies who wouldn't think twice about applying :-)

NannyTreeChelsea · 04/03/2012 01:04

*days

kanna · 04/03/2012 08:09

Any idea what I should offer net for an experienced nanny looking after 3 month twins and 2 year brother. I live in Richmond and will work Mon-Fri 8am-6pm sometimes 6.30pm. I will look at nursery for a couple of days for the 2 year old to try and spread the load and may reduced my days to 4 so can catch up on groceries etc. Still can't believe there are such supernannies out there but great for me if there are.

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londonlottie · 04/03/2012 08:18

I think it says something about your current nanny if she struggles to cope with one child. Millions of mothers are in sole charge of two, three or more children day in day out! Wink. Some cope better than others but echoing what others are saying here you just need to find a competent and experienced nanny.

I have two year old twins; it's been hard work but also a complete joy - congratulations on your impending arrivals!

nannynick · 04/03/2012 08:56

No, No, No! That's the Net Pay again"
Kanna, Kanna, can't you see?
Net pay is silly, silly, silly.

Sorry, couldn't resist Grin

This is mumsnet, we do not talk about writing a blank cheque. Gross Salary is what you need to talk about, so you know what your costs are, not a net salary where your costs are hard if not impossible to calculate. Do not assume that everyone has the same tax code, otherwise you may be in for a big shock if you employ a nanny who for whatever reason (past underpayments, student loan, multiple jobs, to name a few) is not on a single person's tax code.

NannyTree wrote in this message thread (20 Feb 2012) that they placed a nanny in Richmond, 50 hours per week, at £13.50 Gross per hour (£675 gross per week). So about £511 Net if 810L tax code 2012/13 tax year... if you need the comparison though of course your nanny might not be 810L.

I feel it's an employers market at the moment... lots of applicants, not that many jobs. So you can calculate what you want to pay and then advertise the job at that salary. £600 gross per week I would imagine would be quite attractive to many applicants.

I would not look at nurseries. I would suggest you look at pre-schools (what oldies like me used to call playgroups) which run for around 3 hours as either a morning or afternoon session. From the term following your eldest child's 3rd Birthday, you would get up to 15 hours of funded pre-school education.
Richmond Pre-Schools Some providers are also Full Daycare Nurseries but have a pre-school element to them. This would give your eldest child some independence and your twins some time with your nanny, without older sibling around.

If you reduce your days to 4 - your nanny could still do 5 (if that is affordable). Surprising how much more you can get done without children in tow. Also means you can spend 1:1 time with individual children, taking them on a special trip out for example... to a cafe, to the shops, have their hair cut, children are not that fussy when it comes to having 1:1 time with mummy.

mopbucket · 04/03/2012 12:21

I would ditch live out nanny at christmas and have a new live out nanny ready to start in jan then she can get used to 2yr old and the routine before babies are born, it will be less of a shock for her and you

mybootsaremuddy · 04/03/2012 17:05

We dont live in London and have no idea what the going rate is for there. We live in SW (in middle of nowhere) and pay our nanny £11ph gross. She lives out and due to fact we have 6dc (so her focus just isnt big enough!) we have put her on the insurance of our VW transporter and our farm vehicles (her and her DP also help on the farm or take dc 1,2,3 to pony activities from time to time).

Blondeshavemorefun · 04/03/2012 17:49

ANY NANNY WORTH HER SALT WOULD BE ABLE TO COPE WITH BABY TWINS AND A TODDLER

whoops hit caps

years ago i had twins of 6mths, 2 and nearly 4yr-and the mum was told she was infertile!!

prob be nice for the toddler to go to nursery for maybe a session or 2 a week to give them a chance of free play and for nanny to have a slight break - but again why not wait till 3 and get free place to save money

CestTout · 05/03/2012 12:14

Agree with everyone that a nanny should easily be able to handle twins and a 2 year old. I know it isn't quite the same but my first nanny job was 3 under 4 years at 18 years old. Second was 4 under 5 years, so you should be fine!

StealthToddler · 05/03/2012 20:41

A good experienced live out nanny should be fine with twin 6m old and 2 yr old - remember you advertise the position and only those who think they can handle it should apply.
By 6m the twins will be easier but still hard work so maybe putting the 2 yr old into nursery mornings might be an idea as it will make things a bit easier for nanny and would mean nanny can take them to some age specific activities whilst your toddler also gets time with kids his/her own age?
Not quite the same but my nanny has looked after 3 ds' since I went back to work ft. They were 4.0, 2.6 and 7 months so also hard work. My nanny has 25 yrs experience, is calm, brilliant with all 3 (I think she copes better than me!) and knew exactly what the job was before she started. My two oldest do mornings at nursery so afternoons are all together.
You might need to pay a little more but no need to change your preferences unless you really want live in.
Am not sure live in is that much cheaper when you work out extra food costs and bills. And a friend of mine is really not liking having someone else in her house at weekends but likes the weekday convenience.

pinkpeony · 06/03/2012 10:16

Kanna you might want to consider a live-in nanny. Normally the pay is around £100 npw lower than live-out in London. Also, they don't require a car, if they can get around by bus, walking, etc. to wherever they go with the DCs. The advantage of live-in is that they save on commute time, so they can work 12 hours per day, plus 2 nights babysitting during the week. Helps if you have to be in work early, finish late, and you have the peace of mind that your nanny will start work on time and you're not at the mercy of tube strikes, etc. With twins, having the extra hour of help in the morning is worth a lot. I went back to work when DC1 2yrs and DC2 5m, and having a live-in nanny who started at 7 was the only way I could make sure I can shower, get dressed, and out of the house on time (DH was usually out of the house by 7).

kanna · 19/04/2012 00:22

I wonder if you super ladies can help me again. Twins now due first week of May and really appreciated everyone comments on the nanny which I shall look for when I go back to work in 6 months. In the meantime, can you advise as was really shocked at cost of maternity nurses. I will need help though as in my 40s, have had difficult pregnancy and having c-section so a bit sore first 2 weeks. Some friends have put a little fund together and I thoughts about a night nanny for first couple of weeks then perhaps for a couple of nights afterwards if affordable. Then see if I could find a mother's help for some afternoons to help with feeding, cleaning and try and get my little girl into nursery a few mornings. Can such an arrangement work with 3 under 2?

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StealthToddler · 19/04/2012 13:36

you just need a good nanny. one who is experienced with twins will have no problem at all.
my nanny looks after my 3 ds under 5. when I went back to work this last time they were 4.0, 2.8 and 8 months....it is doable. to some extent having them this close together is a little bit easier as they will probably all be having lunch time naps so she will get a bit of a break, and she won't have to do any school runs. I have put mine for a few hours nursery during term time after age 2, but only because they love it and it is a nursery school so they are learning.

you just need a capable nanny and don't hire anyone who seems to think it would be difficult. IME live in is not really that much cheaper as you have other extra costs associated plus you have someone else in your house and might not have as much privacy.

StealthToddler · 19/04/2012 13:41

...and on night nannies....I used a night nanny with DS1 as was sooo exhausted and shell shocked at what it was really like with a baby! I had one for about 2 weeks spread over the first 3 months to give a bit of relief. I used one through personal recommendation so didn't pay an agency, but it was £10 an hour or £90 for the night (9pm-7am). Baby slept in same room as night nanny and when woke she brought baby to me for a feed then took him away to settle him (that was teh bit that took ages with DS1).
A mothers help sounds a great idea, but generally that is someone helping you, not to have sole charge of the children. you might be able to get a nanny for just a few hours a day as plenty of nannies look for such work whilst looking for full time positions. if you are in london I imagine you would easily find someone -have you looked on nannyjob? i found that excellent and it cuts out the agency fees (particularly if you are happy to look through and call references yourself).

kanna · 21/04/2012 03:17

Thank you for taking the trouble to respond. Really helpful. Still have a couple of weeks so im sure i'll sort it out.

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KatieMiddleton · 21/04/2012 03:30

Your local branch of the NCT have a private online group where parents swap information. Many a nanny has been passed on or shared by local parents via the group and you can probably get a good recommendation for a maternity nanny too.

Google Richmond and NCT and there's a link to the egroup on their branch page.

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