Nanny during maternity leave

[AAK1797]

We have an amazing nanny for our child, and I am now pregnant again. I will go back to work again after baby 2 arrives - I will probably have about 7 - 8 months of maternity leave. We will definitely keep our nanny during this time, on the same terms (salary etc.) as we would usually employ her. So both she and I will be around in the daytime.

I wondered if anyone had been in a similar situation, either as a nanny or a boss.

I am guessing that I might ask her to start a bit later in the mornings as I could do breakfast (at least after the first 6 weeks or so) and maybe she could finish earlier some nights. There might even be the odd day where I might want to take both children out somewhere, in which case maybe I might not need her at all. As long as I gave her enough notice of this sort of thing, do you think she would mind?

Otherwise, I guess she will continue as usual with elder child, and I will probably do the sorts of things with the baby that I did on maternity leave before. But I wonder if I will find this a bit wierd.... Alternatively, I could join her on her outings with elder child - but again, this might be a bit wierd.

I don't want to tread on her toes, equally I do want to see more of my eldest whilst I am on maternity leave.

Nanny and I get on really well, so I don't have any issue with spending time with her. I'm sure whatever routine we adopt it will all be OK, but I'm keen to make it as easy as possible on everyone!

Does anyone have any thoughts / tips?

Thanks!

I have never had a nanny. However I know that having two small children can be very hard work.

I think that having a nanny/ mothers's help could be very useful. Especially during those first six weeks. The nanny could help amuse the older child during marathon breastfeeding sessions. Or if you choose to bottlefeed may the nanny could help with making up feeds or sterilizing bottles. Having someone to look after both kids while you have a lovely hot bath/ nap could be bliss.

"I don't want to tread on her toes, equally I do want to see more of my eldest whilst I am on maternity leave."

There might be occassions that the nanny looks after the baby so that you can spend time some one to one time with the older child.

I know I am incredibly lucky to be able to keep our nanny whilst I am on maternity leave, and my life will be immesurably easier because of it! Good point about leaving baby with her and spending time with older one - thanks.

I kept my nanny with us whilst on leave for ds2 and ds3 and am so thankful I did.

My DS's were all pretty close together so it was exhausting. I used having our nanny with us as an opportunity to allow the older ds's to still get lots of time doing all their favourite things. It allowed me to have some sleep during the day ( hour here and there) and it allowed me to spend a little bit more time actually doing fun things with the older DS's as we woudl all go out for the day or part of the day, or at home nanny would watch the baby whilst I played with the older ones.

It meant the baby and older children had continuity of care, and the baby didn't have a complete shock with a new person looking after them when I returned to work!

It meant when DH disappeared off on a business trip when DS3 was 3 weeks old for a week, that I had someone to help me with bath and bedtime (which would have been hideous otherwise).

I have no family nearby at all, and both grannies have passed away, so for me the support our nanny gave us was amazing.

Having said that, it only worked becuase I get on well with our nanny and neither one of us will undermine the other in front of the children. She understands that I want to spend time with my children but I wouldn't suddenly expect her to cancel any fun things she had planned with the children.

They were able to still ahve all their usual playdates, do their usual classes etc, without mummy being stressed out. Sometimes I did their class with nanny watching baby, and sometimes nanny took them to their class.

In the first few weeks, my nanny was fab doing lovely things like cooking extra food and making me lots of cups of tea and checking if there was any shopping doing in addition to teh usual stuff she did for teh kids.

The more I type the more I realise she is an absolute gem

AAK

based on your post i would have no problem with all that if i was your nanny.

would certainly not be upset about later starts / earlier finishes, and i could even cope with days off with hardly any notice!!!!

Hi AAK, You sound lovely and thoughtful. I worked as a nanny when My boss was on maternity leave as she had a 4 and 6 year old. I did everything that the little boy was used to eg playdates, swimming lesson etc, but also looked after baby once fed so the mum could get some sleep or have time with the other children or time for herself.
Definiately helpful to the children to have their routine uninterrupted and does make it easier to return to work without worrying that your baby doesn't really know their nanny.
Hope it all goes well.

I agree with the other posters, you sound like a lovely employer.

I'm another nanny who does not need to have her arm twisted to start late/finish early (as I did today! Thanks boss!)

I have worked for mothers on maternity leave, we just carried on as normal, doing our normal routine. My employers didn't want to do the classes we did as I had found the classes myself and they didn't know anyone, however my current boss started my charge at her classes and knows and is touch with a lot of the people from these classes, so I'm sure she will want to take my charge occasionally to them. I'm quite happy to do this, but as long as I know what is going on.

I have taken the new baby to classes with us, for walks or just to the shops while mum had a nap. They found it much easier to sleep if we all left the house as the baby crying would disturb them. The baby also tended to go longer between feeds if there was lots of things to look at!

Communication is key to any nanny/employer relationship, just remember to give her plenty of notice of any changes.

I'm sure it'll go swimming and way to fast!!

As a nanny I have done this twice so far... both times it worked out fine. The existing children keep with their usual routines and have the benefit that mum will may occasionally do the pre-school/school collection, if mum feels like doing it. The children get to realise that whilst mum is around at home, mummy is tired, so nanny is there to take care of all their [the children's] immediate needs and mum is there for cuddles, reading a story perhaps, or whatever mum feels like doing at that particular moment. Nanny can also help out mum if needed... even if it's just making cups of tea, or whatever mum is drinking at that time.

Once baby arrives, nanny is there to keep consistency in the older children's lives, whilst still letting them spend quality time getting to know their new sibling. Having someone else around can be handy if you fancy a shower, or a bath... as nanny can hold the baby. Baby therefore gets some contact time with nanny and over the weeks/months your baby gets more used to nanny, thus making it easier I feel for when the time comes for mum to go back to work - as baby is happy to be in care of nanny and mum is happy that nanny is capable of caring for baby. Spending time 1:1 with your eldest is also a plus point once baby is happy to be in nannies care for short periods.

Communication as ever is key... keep letting your nanny know what is happening and discuss changes that could be done on a temporary basis. Nannies can often like shorter days (as long as the pay does not change) and a nanny working say 4 long days may depending on their circumstances be prepared to do 5 shorter days.

You may find it a bit weird. You may want to have a rule in place that nanny does not come in your bedroom - even when you want them to bring you a cup of tea (they leave it at by your bedroom door, so you can get it in your own time). Having your own place in your home where others can't go may help make it a bit less weird.