finding au pairs on the internet, advice

[areyoutheregoditsmemargaret]

Our current ap (a previous nanny who then moved abroad, then decided to come back for a stay) is leaving in a couple of months. I was vaguely browsing gumtree just so see what was out there and came across a seemingly very good potential ap. She is British but currently working in Spain, however she wants to return to the UK and ap, while continuing her uni course.

We exchanged some emails. We've talked on the phone. I've chased one of her references (excellent) and am waiting for another. She seems ideal, but I have never met her and I don't desperately want to fly to Spain for a final interview. I know people often hire aps via agencies that they've never met in person but I am a bit uneasy about the process and dh will need convincing too.

Any advice, please?

Can you invite her for a weekend to the UK?

We could but i imagine it would be only fair to pay for it and that's a very expensive way of deciding

Yes you should pay for it: although air fares aren't as cheap as they used to be it shouldn't cost much more than an agency fee would and is 10x more useful.

We always do this (except once, which was bad), as do a number of other MNing AP employers.

true re agency fees - and this isn't really about saving money it's about finding the right person. If that is normal practice, then that's what we'll try to do!

My advise is to be nosey. Most young people have their life published on the internet in form of blogs, facebook and other logs.

Simply use open google.dk, google.de (depending on your potential ap's location) and type "name surename" +blog (translate blog into ccorrect language using google translate)

And try and find them on facebook.

Then google translate what you find...

I have had 4 lovely and perfect au pairs so far but it has taken some time to find them amongst the less suitable ones.

I have thanks to my googling avoided some that sounded amazing and had great ref but had problems and habits that they "forgot" to declare.

One even stated in her blog that she intended to pretend to want to work as ap but only so she could get free accomondation for a couple of weeks until she found a proper job.

Another one suffered from epilepsia and quite badly too judging of her blog....another one was on medication due to depression.

And no, neither mentioned this in their application or during initial contact.

If I can't find them online I won't bother

I'd rather have one that chooses not to spread her private life over the internet.

re 'If I can't find them online I won't bother':

it means you might be weedign out sensible people,who know how to protect themselves on the net or are smart enough not to have their life wrapped around internet. if they are careful about their privacy, they are likely to treat your family's details the same.

thanks, I've already checked her out on facebook etc and she seems fine. Crossing my fingers