I am an ex-nanny and am often absolutely baffled by some of the things I have read on here. I understand that getting a nanny is a complicated and confusing process when you?re doing it for the first time, but I would like to offer some advice from the nanny?s perspective. I am not perfect, no-one is, and I don't mean this to upset people AT ALL, I just thought it might help:
Do not appoint a nanny out of desperation; if you can?t find the right nanny for you, wait until you do. It will be worth it in the long run ? I can?t understand why people settle for nannies that they?re not 100% happy with ? these are your children being looked after, not your houseplants!
Make sure you have a full contract, including sick pay, compassionate leave, holiday pay/entitlement, notice periods for sickness, holidays and leaving the job for you and for the nanny, expenses, and how much of your food she can eat and when. Casual verbal arrangements and sloppy contracts do not work! Most of the problems I have read about on here have arisen because of this, or because of not including the below:
Along with the contract, write a list of duties that you would like her to perform, so that there?s no confusion/resentment about ironing, cleaning, shopping, cooking etc. Also include anything else you feel strongly about ? i.e. television, internet use, food for the children, what to do about bad behaviour etc.
Remember that your nanny is human! Nannies typically work for longer hours than a city worker with significantly less pay, breaks, perks and holidays. If your children are too old for daytime naps, arrange for your nanny to have a break during the day where the children agree that they will play in another room and let the nanny sit down for half an hour. If your children are little, don?t give the nanny jobs to do while they?re sleeping ? let her have a break! No-one can work effectively without a break, and it?s also illegal!
Don?t arrive home late thinking that she won?t mind ? she will, but she won't want to say anything. Obviously you can?t help it if it?s genuine and she will understand that. If you can let her leave early on occasion that is also brilliant for the nanny! (I'm not talking about every week here, just occasionally.)
If you have any problems with your nanny, talk to her about them immediately, don?t let it fester. Although it is very important to ask your children if they are happy with their nanny and they should feel able to speak up if something?s wrong, it?s not fair to encourage them to tell tales on her. We all know that children?s understanding and perspectives on things can be different from ours so it?s not fair not to give the nanny a say. If you were managing someone at work and were unhappy with their performance you would say something ? do the same here. Encourage your nanny to feel able to raise problems with you too.
Re. Xmas pay/bonuses/presents, it?s up to you and obviously dependant on how much you earn, but anything you can give is much appreciated, as it would be by you at your workplace.
Your children are the most precious and important things in your life: therefore the person who looks after them should be treated accordingly, with respect and with gratitude.