Nanny's trips to cafe with DCs - no drinks for DCs!

[travellingtime]

Our nanny, we realise (thought chatting to DS), sometimes takes the DCs to Costa (or similar) with her mother after school
In principal i have no objection to this. however, she doesnt buy a drink for them. I do not routinely leave money out for these type of trips. It tends to operate more on the basis that nanny uses her cash for play groups etc and submits an expense claim each month.
DS tells me she wont buy him a drink cos i dont leave money out.
Several issues - trips to cafe now and then ok for kids as its a pleasant outing and good experience for them. but, seems unkind for them to sit there with nothing whilst nanny and mum have a nice drink and a chat.
the trip is clearly more for the benefit of nanny than the kids. we do allow a lot of freedom for her to do her own thing, but this feels like a bit of a bridge too far.
we do plan to raise the issue but am curious for other's thoughts on this

just warm frothy milk with a bit of hot choc sprinkled on the top if you're lucky!

ooo nice idea.

becstarsky thats the perfect thing to say, getting the point across without falling out.

Redglow - not sure tbh - prob same way I got a brand new iPhone after smashing mine

If my nanny wanted to take DS to a cafe I'd be more than happy. If it were infrequent I'd pay for her drink and a croissant or something, because DS will pike a bit. When he's older I'd expect him to get a juice or something.

We leave a kitty, but if we did expenses it would be no different. What I find odd is that she doesn't want a kitty but is using the no kitty excuse to say no drink

Would not mind blondes but you dont even like costa I do I never go in SB.

The trick to getting a free baby chino is for the kid to order it and to say 'please' and 'thank you'. No barista can resist a tiny tot saying 'pweese baby chino? pweeease?? tank oo!' DS always got a plateful of marshmallows with his. He's older now so that gravy train is over...

ive always had free ones whether sb or costa

becstarsky they do this and I still get charged. Perhaps that is how blondes got her free phone. Blondes you are just showing of now.

I agree with you travelling time, it seems to me that she is not sure she should be doing it (or doing it so often) that she doesn't claim and then have to explain to you why she was there.

I go for coffee with my charge, generally when she needs feeding/milk, she is 6 months and so I don't buy her anything, obviously but if I have to go somewhere to feed her i.e., before/after a class, then my boss pays for my coffee (and sandwich if it is over lunch time, which it is on a Tuesday at the moment) But if I choose to be in town and don't have any errands to run for the family, then I pay for my own drinks and food. Why should they have to pay £3.50 for a coffee when there are perfect fine drinks at home and it is my choice to be there?

I'm with swedes - ridiculous

The nanny is paid for childcare not chat and cappucino

Why are you all focussing on something that the op said she is fine with?

But which bit? The trips or the way expenses are handled?

The op isn't happy that they're going AND DC are getting nothing. This is allegedly because she dosen't leave a kitty. So something isn't fine from the nanny's POV there which is leading to something not being fine for the OP.

The easiest solution, it seems, would be to leave a small kitty to cover those drinks.

The time with her mother I mean. The op has said she knows and is happy with this but still there seems to be the need to pick her up on it.

You do know the kids drinks in there are fruitshoots don't you?!?

Agree with frak. If she doesn't want a kitty then why is that the excuse for not getting the DC drinks?

I also never pay for babychinos, I am not blonde. Or a nanny

Just ask her why she doesn't buy the children a drink when she meets her mum for coffee? Then be quiet and see what she says.

I find it a bit odd tbh. why would she not want to get them a treat if they're going to get herself one? I also think it's a case of she thinks that it's cheeky to be doing it on work time. If you're happy with her doing it reassure her and say you don't mind them having treats.

My DB told me the other week to skip the park and a nice walk and go get a coffee for myself I wouldn't expect to do it on work time but if my bosses are okay with it I'd do it occasionally.

& I also prefer not to have a kitty and to put in a claim for expenses instead. It's such a pita when parents forget to put money in and/or they don't have the money on them in the morning when either you or parents remember it and then you have the whole 'two purses' thing which is just as annoying! I'd rather give them a sheet at the end of each month which tells them what they owe me and copies of receipts. But I don't find it a hassle as I keep all receipts and log every penny I spend anyway.

I think it's boring for a small kid to go to a cafe, so I would not really think it brilliant way for them to spend time....tbh

it also shows a mean spirited side of the nanny. She could have brought a carton of juice along for them, or she should have told you upfront that this is happening...and asked for money.

It's like she is proving a (weird sort of)point at the expense of your DC.

If baby chinos are free might that be why se hasn't asked for money? And maybe ds didn't like it or refused it?

I'd be annoyed she was using her work time to drag my DC to a boring cafe while she chats to her mum, without so much as a babyccino in compensation. I'd ask for the cafe trips to stop, hot chocolate or no hot chocolate.

I'd be annoyed she was using her work time to drag my DC to a boring cafe while she chats to her mum

But the OP has said she knows and is fine with this so it's not an issue. Why she doesn't buy the kids a drink or want a kitty is.

?Poor children sitting waiting quietely while people drink and chat.?

?She's being paid to look after your children. Not to sit in Costa gassing to her mother.?

?Sitting in a cafe with a cup of water listening to the person who's supposed to be looking after you gas on to her mother is NOT educational?

?I'd be annoyed she was using her work time to drag my DC to a boring cafe while she chats to her mum,?

Were you all there then? Watching and listening? You know the kids were bored? You know that the nanny and her mother weren't talking to/with the children?

My mum doesn't come to my work (she lives too far away and works), but the DC's I look after love having another adult to chat to, to show their work to, to tell what happened at school that day etc etc.

The OP hasn't said that her kids are unhappy/bored/don't like going to the cafe and I can't see how it's helpful to make these sort of assumptions.

she does bring a drink with her for the kids
maybe she just not trust the 5 year old with a hot drink near a 20 month year or would take to long to for the kids to drink something hot
or does not want the kids to have chocolate or crap kids drinks

why is going in after school is it wait before going to actively? cos that is why i would be there and if my mum was there that would just a nice thing for me and kids

I dont' like that at all....it says something nasty about her personality if you ask me. She coud ask for a babychino ffs! They're free!