Should I report childminders unacceptable behaviour?

[henrald]

I am lucky enough to be able to stay at home to look after my children and we attend a number of playgroups each week. Here we always encounter many childminders and nannys often bumping into the same group several times a week. Whilst the majority of them are really great with the children in their charge, there is one lady in particular who I have am concerned about

Over the months there have been many incidents that I have raised an eyebrow about but have brushed aside as we all have different methods of parenting and disciplining. However a few weeks ago one of the little boys she looks after who is 12 months old was repeatedly ignored, pushed past and shaken off by this woman, who commented to her childminder friend "hes doing my head in following me everywhere" The child screamed for the entire hour, lifting up his arms to be picked up. At one point he was picked up, plonked in the corner with a jigsaw and left, still sobbing. I went over with my 20 month old son and was immediately reprimanded and told not to "give him any attention cos thats what he wants" (is this not what all babies want)

This week at playgroup a little girl she was looking after cried all the way through story time (as my own have sometimes) and the childminder repeatedly put her hand over the babys mouth to stop her. I and others who had seen this were horrified!

What should I do? I am torn! I just keep thinking if this was my baby I would be distraught.

I've seen a fair few nannies behaving in a similar way. Hard to know what to do when you don't know them or the parents.

Thank you Tanith your advice is very useful. I have thought of nothing else all week and about my options since the fantastic advice and support received via this forum.

The only thing that worries me about speaking to the sure start team is anonymity. I and my children attend several of their sessions a week and so do the group of childminders. I'm sure they wouldnt say anything but I would hate for my children to get caught up in any of this in any way. If I were to report it straight to OFSTED or direct to the childminding team at the local authority, I can at least ensure that they are kept out of it.

I hope this doesnt sound selfish and that people can understand. I can assure everyone that I AM going to take one of these courses of action immediately. I am a bit dubious about posting updates about this situation on here, also for anonymity reasons as I know that this site is used by many childminders and mums that may recognose the incidents I have mentioned and consequently recognise me.

Thank you all again for your support and advice

the sure start team should have good procedures about child protection and that should I imagine include keeping confidential who has raised compliants

Bankholiday. As I have mentioned, I am a stay at home mum so my week is filled with many playgroups, toddler sessions and trips to the park! Every other childminder/nanny I have come across has been fantastic with the children they look after. Ive even looked upon a few for tips and advice on how to control my own little monsters!!! (it always amazes me how they can quite easily get 3 or 4 children out of the park and walking home in 5 seconds flat when it takes me half an hour of coaxing and bribing)

Please dont let this incident frighten you about leaving your baby with a childminder as I am sure this is very rare.

If it helps, I've attended surestart groups for several years and I have known two incidents at surestart playgroups where action was taken against a childminder, although none as serious as the one you describe.

The first was a new childminder behaving inappropriately. A couple of childminders had tried tactfully to intervene and, when they were ignored, someone must have notified the surestart team. They then reported to the Childminding team who made home visits and identified training that they strongly recommended the childminder undertake (and we all know what that means ).

The second was a straightforward over-numbers incident that the centre reported to OFSTED who conducted an early morning surprise check on the childminder.

In neither case was the childminder in question ever told who had made the complaint.

These incidents took place at different Surestart centres so, while I can't guarantee yours will be as stringent regarding confidentiality, it's likely that they will be.

Thank you for the reassurance henrald and Anothername. The CM I found really seems lovely, so I hope DS will be happy. Anyway, it's good to know this is so rare, although it's horrible that someone can behave like this will little ones, who can't speak up for themselves. Good luck henrald, completely understandable that you don't want to post updates. It's reassuring to know that people are taking action if they witness something like this. xx

please report,

for the sake of the child of course and for the sake of the trusting parents, she needs to be stopped from child minding at once, she sounds vile and if shes like this in public goodness knows what shes like in private.

also for the sake of all good cms out there she is giving us a bad name..

finally its your duty as a citizen to report abuse and neglect of children to the authorities.

If it was my child she was 'looking after', I would love you for ever for reporting her and making me aware of the situation. The poor little babies.

What Tanith said.

Please do report her to OFSTED and Sure Start.

I reported my ex-childminder to Ofsted for inappropriate behaviour. Once I had done this I heard shocking stories from mothers about the way this woman had behaved to my child in their presence. But they had just looked the other way. This was very painful for me to hear, and I wish they had had the courage of their convictions and said something at the time.

The result of my report is that the childminder was subject to an unannounced visit and made to do behaviour management training.

well not sure how 'behaviour managment training' will turn a cow into a nice person tbh.

I am a bit amazed at the amount of posters who come on here complaining quite rightly about seeing cases of abuse, cms and parents and ask, 'should I report?'.

I am quite capable of marching up to anyone I see acting like this and challenging them face to face, especially in a sure start environment, we all need to be a bit more bolshy I think.