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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

Need some sympathy about nanny - fed up

21 replies

lobsters · 04/05/2011 20:51

Sorry quick rant time, my nanny is getting married soon and getting increasingly distracted. Today has really annoyed me, she's managed to lose the front door key. I don't quite understand how she did it, somehow it came off her key ring and fell out of her bag. I know accidents happen but I would expect her to be a little contrite. Unless she finds it tonight, I'm probably going to have to get the locks changed, which won't be cheap. And after a long day at work I had to drive to her house to get DD. It only dawned me afterwards that I really should have got her to drive DD back home once I was on my way home.

I've got enough on, I don't really want to have to sort out a locksmith etc.

Sorry rant over

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

nannyj · 04/05/2011 21:08

I lost my bosses cradit card last week, was mortified as she had to sort cancelling it when she was on a business trip.

mybootsaremuddy · 04/05/2011 21:12

Is your address on the nannys key? If not then why would you need to change the locks? Surley If anyone finds the key they will not know where its too.
Has she checked the floor of her car or the seats? my keys have fallen out of my bag before and i found them under the passenger seat 2 weeks later when cleaning out the car.

nannyl · 04/05/2011 21:16

I had a key fall off my key-ring.... the ONLY key i have ever lost in my life....

my bosses had has huge building works done on there (lovely large) house...
and when all was finished they had special locks made so all 9 lockable doors had the same key, and they were fitted and they gave me one of the keys (as you do) on a keyring that it came with, and i put it on my bunch of keys....

less than a week later the key disappeared during the school run... it was NEVER found on gravel drive, or school grounds, the only places i had actually been between locking door and returning home to no key on my bunch of keys....

as there was EVERY possibility that they key could be somewhere on the (pretty big) drive, they had to have all 9 locks re-made and re-fitted, less than a week after they were brand new.

They never expected me to pay, or even suggested i should have paid. (I wouldnt have paid for 9 new locks anyway, as i was NOT negligent in any way, and it was the fault of they key ring they gave me.

the key to this day has never turned up!

frakyouveryverymuch · 04/05/2011 21:26

Why on earth was DD at your nanny's house?

Keys get lost - unfortunate but true - and it is safer to change the locks :(

Original poster

lobsters · 04/05/2011 21:31

I'm not going to make her pay for the locks, I'm just annoyed about it, and would have liked her to say sorry a bit. Accidents happen. The key is just to the front door, I feel I will have the change the locks in case she dropped it outside the house and someone has picked it up. The key rings were hers.

My nanny took DD to her house when they couldn't get back into our house, they went there so she could have tea etc.

I've asked her to check her bags and car again to see if it turns up

OP posts:

Strix · 04/05/2011 22:19

there there lobsters... virtal hug

(no one else seems to have offered the sympathy you were looking for)

nannynick · 04/05/2011 22:35

Rough day but looking on the bright side she didn't lose DD!

Tomorrow is another day, never know the key might turn up.

BecauseImWorthIt · 04/05/2011 22:41

Wow! Massive over-reaction here.

If the key had your address on it, then I can understand that you would want to have the locks changed.

But as you haven't said that - really, what's the issue?

Cut the girl some slack. Everyone loses things occasionally.

PowderMum · 04/05/2011 23:04

One of my nanny's left the keys on the roof and drove off
Made her retrace the route and find them

On the other hand DD1 is no longer allowed a key as she loses them - just wait until your DC are independent

bibbitybobbityhat · 04/05/2011 23:07

Are you saying she didn't apologise?

Rudgey · 04/05/2011 23:31

Sorry,I know you may be stressed at the moment, but do you really think she lost the key on purpose!!!! It was obviously mistake and what, do you never make a mistake???

HappyAsIAm · 05/05/2011 08:46

I would be miffed too, as I understand that what you are saying is that nanny didn't apologise or seem contrite, and this is now going to cause you expense and bother. I would have expected an apology too.

Tomorrow will be a better day, lobsters. Up and down, and all that. Lots of sympatyhy coming your way! At least the sun is shining and your DD is ok.

valiumbandwitch · 05/05/2011 08:51

why do you need to change all the locks? unless she lost the key with the address tied to it then I think it's unnecessary. An expense you're choosing to take on. I have lost various keys and not changed the locks.

If I lost my entire handbag then yeah I would obviously change the locks as it would be more obvious which front door the keys opened.

The reason she's not being that 'contrite' (!!) is because she thinks that if somebody gets their key cut and gives her a copy then the problem is resolved.

wolfhound · 05/05/2011 08:54

Yes, that is really annoying. I understand why you need to change the lock - the key could have been lost very close to the house, and it's not worth the risk. It's very annoying when other people are lax with your keys. Sympathy from here!

ChippingIn · 05/05/2011 09:01

The reason she's not being contrite and apologetic is because the key fell off of her keyring... she didn't take it off, attach your address to it and give it to the nearest passing burglar! It's not something that happened because she's 'distracted' - I mean, you don't 'watch' your keys do you

No doubt you'll now come back with a list of things your nanny has done to piss you off lately - fine. If there are real issues talk to her, if you are just concerned that she has a life as well as being your nanny you need to get over yourself.

Either way - she didn't lose the key on purpose nor through neglect/stupidity. No sympathy required. Get another key cut - job done.

valiumbandwitch · 05/05/2011 09:09

I agree ChippingIn. Can this really be about a key?

I mean, OP would only be human if she were a tiny bit jealous of her nanny going off to get married, have a beautiful wedding/honeymoon, fresh slate, and then........ perhaps she will see the nanny as her equal now, both married women, lol, sounds archaic to type it. But previously whereas she might have felt she was employing a younger woman/single girl to mind her children, now it might be about to become a little bit more awkward. I dunno. Sorry for cod psychology.

SofaQueen · 05/05/2011 09:23

valium, I think you are reading way too much into this - where you get that drivel is beyond me.

Understandably irritating, and she should have at least said sorry (why people think it is alright to not apologize is strange). Logic says that if the key was lost without any indication of address, you are at low risk of someone using the key to enter your house. However, if you are a worrier, just change the locks, but it isn't necessary.

valiumbandwitch · 05/05/2011 10:02

Seriously, I think the OP is reading WAY too much into one lost key, and when people create a drama out of very little there's usually a real reason that they can't articulate without being 'unreasonable'.

It's hardly freakishly abnormal to be jealous of somebody else's fresh start in life.

Strix · 05/05/2011 11:32

I would be a tad annoyed if my au pair lost the key to the front door and I had to change locks. I'd accept it as one of thise things. But, if she didn't even apologise, I'd be a tad more annoyed.

Nanny employers are people too, and they entitled to get annoyed from time to time.

Also, keeping track of the key on your keyring is, in my opinion, part of the job. And losing, whils not intentional, is a bit negligent.

I do know what it is like to have a nanny with attitude. I once had one whom I took on a trip and she complained because she had to sit next to a stranger. Buy did that annoy me. Should have left her at home.

Original poster

lobsters · 05/05/2011 21:01

Erm I'm not jealous of the wedding etc, she is older than me, she is not then really starting a new life, they already live together so there is no disappearing into the sunset together. There is also no honeymoon yet (reasons to do with them, nothing to do with me).

I'm annoyed because she didn't really apologise, if I make a mistake at work, I apologise and do what every it takes to put it right and go out of my way to do so, even when it's just an accident.

I thought about whether to change the locks, it's only the front door, but there is a chance she lost it outside the house, so it's not worth the risk.

OP posts:

ChitChattingagain · 05/05/2011 22:48

Lobsters, I would be just as annoyed as you. Drives me wild when the nanny does daft things and then doesn't even apologise. An apology is acknowledging that your actions have inconvenienced someone - it does NOT mean that you did it on purpose, negligently, etc, etc. The nanny lost the key, and should have the grace to at least apologise.

If this is just one in a long line of silly things she's doing because she's not really concentrating properly because of wedding distractions then I would be even more annoyed.

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