Looking after 2 young toddlers single-handedly

[SuiGeneris]

It has been suggested that we share our nanny with another family. The boys would be about 10 and 15 months. I cannot see how one person can look after 2 toddlers for an entire day, especially when a family is not set up for it (i.e. no double buggy). I also think inevitably one child would be ignored while the nanny is feeding/changing/putting the other to sleep. For this reason I also think it would be unsafe.

What do people think?

Quite a few of us have had twins and managed to look after two toddlers reasonably successfully. I guess most of us probably had double buggies though.

Presumably the parents would club together to buy the appropriate kit required.

CMs are allowed to care for 3 under 5 IIRC so there must be plenty who manage with similar set ups

Many parents manage more than adequately with their own children

But if you are not comfortabel with the idea then it is your prerogative.

A childminder with standard conditions could have a six month old and two 13 month olds single handed, full time five days a week. It might be difficult in practice and they would have to be able to meet the children's needs or parents and Ofsted wouldn't be too pleased - so if in practice one was ignored for large amounts of time and concerns were raised then their conditions of registration might be limited.

I think looney had four under 5yos at one time, and variations of this kind are often permitted to allow for continuity of care for siblings/twins/etc.

as a nanny id have no problem what so ever looking after 2 toddlers, for an entire day / week / ever

I certainly dont think its unsafe, i no many many nannies who do it day in day out, safely and happily.

i also nannies who care for triplets (so 3 children), and also a family with an 11m age gap between DC1 and twins, and this wonderful mummy mangaged to keep all 3 safe and happy too 24/7.

Have replied on your other thread, but there should be no problems with a nanny / CM / mum looking after 2 or 3 toddlers per se

i mean know a nanny who cares for triplets

most nannies are professionals and can cope looking after what is like twins, plus even an older one as well - i once had 4 under 4 :)

twins 6mths
toddler just 2
pre schooler of 3.5

many mums cope as well

obviously a double buggy for the nannies sanity is essential

it is not good for a child to have 100% attention 100% of the time - so yes there will be times when the nanny will be feeding/changing/playing/putting to sleep one of the children

or heaven forbid out of the room having a wee for herself so yes the other child may be ignored but the nanny will make sure that that child is safe and wont get into harm/danger

If you had twins you would cope! Might be easier than a young baby and a 5 year old, when their needs and preferred activities would be very different.

Not a problem but from your other thread you seem to worry more about the logistics and loss of flexibility with sickness/holidays etc which is a major downside of a share arrangement.

10 and 15 months isn't too bad. As others have pointed out twins/siblings/mindees have to share a carer and it doesn't hurt.

Surely children of that age can start feeding themselves. It can be a bit messy at times but it's fun for them. I've had three (8mo,13mo and 14mo) at one point and managed. With nappy changes I took all of them to a room I used for changing nappies, shut the door, got a box of toys for them to play with while I was changing nappies.

A few years ago I cared for two sets of twins - 4yrs and 18mths... safety wasn't an issue... it was challenging at times, but fun!

Anyone that chooses nannying would find this no problem at all. They do not have one to one in nurseries. Yes you would need a double buggy but yes they would be safe it will not hurt them to be ignored for a short time probably make a nicer child.

Someone alerted me to my name being mentioned so thought I'd confirm that yes I've had 4 under 5s several times. The youngest they all were was when I started back after my maternity leave when ds2 was 10 weeks old (all 6 were aged 5 and under!). I had different children on different days but to give you an idea, these are the ages on some of the days:

10 weeks old
8 months old
17 months old
18 months old
4 years old (reception so school all day)
5 years old (ds1)

I survived . These children are now 2, 3, 3, 4, 7, almost 8. They are all very very close, especially those who are closer in age! It's so lovely to see them like they are the best of friends. I honestly think having a little friend would be great but then I would say that as in my job (childminder), I see so many positives about having more children around :)

To be honest, just 2 toddlers would be easy peasy imo but some would find it hard. I think a decent nanny should find it easy, honestly, this is their career and I really don't think those ages would be hard together at all but we're all different.

2 toddlers!!! get a grip!!!most people have 2 toddlers of their own at one time... I had 4 kids, oldest two were 16 months apart..

now I cm 4 under 5s 3 times a week.. you just get on with it..

the key is organisation, optimism, patience, sense of humour.... oh and wine at the end of the long long day!!!!!!

Most nannies and CMs I know could do this job easily,this is dependent on the parents providing a double buggy and two high chairs which I see as the only essential needed.Your nanny will just treat the job almost as having twins.I`m looking after three under sixes and have for three years since they were two and three.I agree with The Body.I have a large glass of wine in my hand at the moment!!

I do it it every (working day). I have two 2yo charges and have had them both together for over a year. Prior to that I had twin babies from 9mo - 4yo. It is entirely possible, perhaps not for you but certainly for many others!

Our nanny just works for us, but I have friends who share their nanny - our little ones are all coming up 18mo. I've seen their shared nanny in action a few times and there are some advantages that you might not have thought of - obviously she does have to split her time between the two but this means that they have to learn to be a bit more independent a bit quicker. So they are better than my DS at feeding themselves, got to grips with a spoon sooner, they're better at tackling stairs and obstacles etc. Their mums tell me they both eat better when they are together. I just wanted to share some of the positives I have noticed - it's not "less care", just different. There's certainly no neglect of one while she is caring for the other. And I think it must be fun for the little ones to have a chum around - certainly my DS loves his weekly play dates with them.

I think it would be hard without the right kit - my friends have two highchairs, a double buggy, a second cot or at least a travel cot etc. All investments to share with the other family, I would have thought. You'd need to think whether its worth making that investment for just one day of overlap ...

One other thought - you'd need to agree with the other family how to split the nanny's tax allowances etc.

I did a nanny share, looked after 23 month old, 22 month old, 7 month old and 3 month old. They are all well and happy! I even took them all swimming once a week (back when we were allowed to) took some organising but we managed it without mishap.

I have looked after 3 sets of twins (not at the same time!) from 11 weeks, 4 months and 7 months for at least 2 years so from babies through toddlerhood (looking after the first set for 10 days next week and they are far harder work at 13 years than they were at 13 months!)

I think it is far easier to have two children roughly the same age as they have a little play mate, they can go to and enjoy the same groups/classes, one of them doing something can persuade the other to try it too (of course this can help with older children too) they are at the same learning stages (roughly) and so will play the same games/with the same toys (no teeny bits of lego that older children want to play with and they want to eat!)

When I did my nanny share, I spoke to the parents about getting the children into the same routine, so they ate at the same time (when babies, I would get everything ready and then sit on the sofa or bed, lay the babies on a pillow either side of me and hold their bottles and chat to them while they were drinking their milk) slept at the same time and when you have been doing it a while, it only takes a minute to chnage a nappy (unless explosive!)

I look after 3 toddlers 5 x a week and 2 toddlers on a Sat, I only have one child of my own. That Saturday shift is an absolute doddle to be honest.