Flexible child minder - is it possible? how do I find one

[BlingLoving]

I am pregnant with DC1 and will take 8 months mat leave so there's no rush on this, but am trying to work out how to find a flexible CM.

DH will do most of the child minding at first as he is a freelancer and will cut back massively for a few months. our plan is that over time he'll start doing more again, but the work tends to be ad hoc so ideally we're hoping to find a CM who would be flexible. We envision a situation where we would commit to x number of hours per week but would only confirm which hours they would be the week before depending on when DH has to meet clients etc.

Is this possible? Or does it just mess with the CM's schedule? If so, what are my other choices?

That wouldn't work for me, you could email on a Friday to see what hours I had available, but if you want specific hours you would have to book them (& sadly pay for them).

So this week I had Mon, Tues pm & Thurs am but next week it might be Mon am, Tues & Thurs pm.

You might find a childminder to be that flexible but for me I ideally want all my spaces full so why would I save random hours for you - so you pay for 20 but there are 50 hours that I work, so I effectively lose 30 hours pay

If I understood your suggestion correctly

I did that but it was really complicated, the mum to have 4 days which she was likely to work but not paying for the whole 4 days, so I made her pay 1 full day and 2 half days and 1 free day but it was very generous.

The problem is that they can only have X number of children of a certain age at one time and as KatyMac says keeping a space open when they could have taken another child in that slot costs them in money that they could have earned. So perhaps if you could find one who was just starting out and wanted to ease into things gently with 1, 2, maybe 3 children (or all her regular children are older) then it could work. My childminder is very flexible in this way but I do have core hours with her that DS goes and then on a week by week basis if I have an essay or something due (I'm at uni) I ask if she's ok to have him for a couple of extra hours on X day and usually she says that's fine, though I have had times that she hasn't been able to. I think DS is her only mindee under 5 though.

What you probably want is a nanny - perhaps a nanny share if you can find another parent laid back enough not to mind the flexible approach?

yy I was going to suggest a new starter too

This IS possible, BL, BUT you need to be prepared to pay 'extra' to your needs (not 'extra' to the CM of course)

Or a nanny share

I don't mind paying for a set number of hours, whether or not I use them. And I would expect to pay extra due to the flexibility I want. But what I'm trying to work out is whether it's even possible or frankly such a nightmare for the CM from a logistics and planning point of view that she'd never even consider it.

So realistically, I'd expect in the beginning to say I want two afternoons a week, but one week it would be Thursday and Friday and the next week it might be Tuesday and Thursday.

The number of hours would be relatively low as well as I would envision no more than 10 a week as most of DH's work is done in the evenings so it would be a) to give him a break and b) so that he could do prep work or attend meetings and c) so that if he had to go to a job, he could leave DS with the CM and I would pick him up when I get home from work.

Thanks all. A new starter is a good idea perhaps.

How would a nanny share work in a situation like this?

In some ways, I think what I really need is a very good babysitter, or maybe two for flexibility. But I am not sure about that in the beginning when DS is still very small. When he's a bit older, then that could work perhaps, but I don't think it's a good idea when he's basically still a baby. Any thoughts on that?

Its worth asking around. You may find a cm who prefers not to be full, maybe has 2 regular under 5's & is happy to have a 3rd as & when. I think otherwise you would be looking to pay a lot to retain your open ended space. Does your DH have any control over his appointment time so he could maybe restrict himself to 3 set days per week that the CM would need to keep reserved. I would also suggest that your DS attends the cm for some hours every week whether DH has to work or not, to give him some continuity or he will find it very confusing & disruptive.
I have done something similar & it worked well for me at the time though these were for ad hoc longer days (9-3 usually). I would have found just afternoons harder to accommodate but again that depends on the CM. I have a couple of children who just do afternoons or mornings & fit around each other but this is not common I think

Yes, even if DH didn't have work, we would put DS in for those hours on the basis that it would be good for him and for DH to have the break and in DS's case, different kind of stimulation.

Thanks for the ideas. We've got time so I can do my research and speak to people and try to find someone for whom this kind of arrangement could work.

Unfortunately, we won't have any control over the days DH works away from home. We CAN control his prep time etc, but not when he hs to go to clients.

I'm a cm and offer the kind of service you are looking for; the parent texts me on Saturday morning each week with the two days she wants during the following week.

I charge in arrears at the end of the month for the time she has used.

Suits me fine - I don't want to be full and I like a bit of variety in the days I work.

I'm a CM and this would work for me....I don't want to be full so can be reasonably flexible.

thanks Malovitt and Pinner35. I guess it just means I have to find a CM who wants it this way because they don't want full time work or hours.

have you thought about an au pair?

I agree with Malovitt and Pinner. I'm a CM too and wouldn't mind being that flexible either.

Where are you from? Maybe one of us is nearby you - problem sorted

We do flexible hours too. (Husband and wife) As long as they are in our hours (or close to anyway) then it's ok. The way we see it if we can help in any way with those who need flexible hours we will as long as it's within our ratios of course. The only stipulation we set is that it has to be more than 2 hours in the week. There is no extra payment for hours that they don't use.

Thats how we are happy to work anyway. Not all cm's are able to do that though.

I wouldn't be able to do that for you. Quite simply as you would be taking up a full space but not paying anything close to a full space fee.

You may be able to find someone to do it, but you also run the risk that if that is what they do in general that there may be some weeks where they are full on the days you want and cant take your child.

The other option is for your DH to say he works P/T on Mon & Tues (eg) & book all his visits on those days, leaving his flexible working for if the CMer had space

Wish people would stop going on about Au-pairs.
They are not allowed to have sole care of children under a certain age and certainly not babies.
Nanny share or CM.

malevolentpsammead - there is no rules about au-pairs anymore as the vast majority of people working as aupairs are not aupairs but are live-in nannies.

Those who need to complete a BR3 (pdf) have restrictions on working hours.