advice needed from nannies please! (or those who use one!)

[nowwearefour]

I have a nanny one day a week. I am v happy with her. I am asking this as i dont know what to do in a particular situation. our nanny was recruited on a 'not bring your child along' policy- deliberately on both sides. We wanted full focus on our children and she wanted to earn more money that comes without bringng her dd. it was only for 1 day a week and she took her along to her other job, earning less for doing so. anyway, idc she became pregnant, had her maternity leave and we agreed she could bring her baby when she returned if she came back before the baby was 1. My dds are now older and it doesnt seem so necessary to have the focus on 1 child. We havent dropped the amount we pay her (which has included pay rises in the time we have emplyed her). On red nose day there is a school disco coming up on the day she works. I would love them to go. All children need to have a named adult accompanying them. It costs per child plus extra per younger child that goes along too. I would like her to take my dd's. I am guessing she will want to take her (now nearly 1 yr old). I think she should pay to take her own ds. Do people agree with that? I think if she doesnt want to pay to take him, she needs to make other arrangements for him for the day? it isnt much but money is v tight for both of us. What do others think?

As a nanny who brings my own child to work, I have always paid for him when we attend activities. The way I see it, I am being allowed the privilage of bringing him to work, and he is eating his meals there, and playing with the toys there so it would be rude to ask my employers to pay for him to join an activity. Having said that, my employers do offer to pay but I refuse on the above grounds. I've always told them that if for whatever reason ds can't do an activity that the others do then I will make other arrangements for him. It hasn't happened yet, but the arrangements are the same as if he is sick.
I think that if your nanny can't afford to pay for her child to go then she should make other arrangements. Given that it's a school disco, it can't be that expensive?

it is only a couple of pounds. the issue for me is that she chooses to bring her child to work and we have allowed it, despite seeking a nanny who didnt bring her child to work, and are paying her the rate for not bringing her child. the other issue is that i am effectively forcing her to go- it isnt an activity she has a choice over in this instance. but she can make alternative arranements. but money is so v v v tight that i am aware fo asking her to pay anything extra. i guess i will call her and discuss it and explain she either pays or makes alternative arrangements for that day. i jsut dont want to annoy her !

Did you review her contract when she came back with the child? I wondered whether If not it may be timely to agree what you do/don't pay for. Also if you have kept
Her pay as was then pay review will not be in point.

Oh and re disco I would agree- pay or make other arrangements as otherwise you may set a precedent re costs.

And the boot is on the other foot re annoying- I would imagine it wouldn't be that easy to find something else where you can bring your child for one day. And it's not a question of annoying- you are asking her to do something at work.

Did you review her contract when she came back with the child? I wondered whether If not it may be timely to agree what you do/don't pay for. Also if you have kept
Her pay as was then pay review will not be in point.

Oh and re disco I would agree- pay or make other arrangements as otherwise you may set a precedent re costs.

tricky

i think as you agreed to change the terms of contract, ie to allow her to bring her dc, then the nanny must reliese that there will be times when her child has to go to an activity that you want for your dc and she will pay for it equals out the fact she can bring her own child to work, esp as still on same wage as you discussed for nanny to work without her child

my friend takes her toddler to work with her some days and the mum wanted her dc to go to jo jingles,so my friend arranged for her dc to go as well, so in same group, and the nanny pays for it - but this was discussed at interview that the mum wanted one activity a week for her dc and that the nannys child if was there that day, then the nanny would pay

surely the tickets cant be more than £5

and would they charge full amount for a baby/toddler who probably would sit/be near nanny rather than a school aged child who would be eating/dacning?

anyway after a lot of woffle yes the nanny should pay or make other arrangements :)

There is no way you should pay. I think it is nice of you to let her bring her child to work, she should fit in with you, not the other way around.

I wouldn't have thought a school disco is an appropriate place to take an under 1 year old. Some young children may like it, others won't, especially if there are high levels of noise.

Will there be other under 1's there? Is school even prepared for there to be non-school aged children in attendance? Does the school's music license, insurance, health & safety policy cover a 1 year old going to the disco?

I think the school are asking a bit much to pay for a baby under a year to go to a disco anyway tbh

I think eveyone is right in that she should pay for her ds, however, as it's a one-off event and it's a couple of pounds I'd be tempted to just pay it rather than risk annoying her.

She should pay.
i agree with nannynick that it might not be suitable for the baby. It that case it is her responsibility to arrange other care for her baby.

agree re charging for baby but the policy is younger siblings (it is an infant school) can come but must pay a nominal sum. I havent a view on suitability- but prob agree it might not be. but i do want my dd's to be able to go so i'll just discuss it with her- her choice to take and pay or make other arrangements. thanks all. but i prob should look at re-visiting the contract.