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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Can I do this with parent's permission?

21 replies

doonhamer · 11/02/2011 10:36

I have a very important appointment one dya next week. Mindees parents had arranged for one of them to have the morning off so I can go, but they have changed their plans as both parents are off now and they want to do something.
I need to go to this appointment it is very important to me. I cannnot and will not take mindees with me.
Parents are shrugging their shoulders saying "oh well we don't know what to do".
So, with their permission could I book the mindee into the local nursery for the morning?

OP posts:
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SnapFrakkleAndPop · 11/02/2011 10:51

You're a CM, your service is closed, correct? You're presumably not being paid for this time either.

Up to the parents to deal with it! You can suggest local nurseries, a crèche, another CM but it's not your responsibility.

doonhamer · 11/02/2011 10:56

My service was going to be unavailiable for the morning only (for the times of the appointment) initially, then mum said she would get morning off and drop him back with me after I got was finished with appointment. But the parents are now busy doing other things and therefore have more or less said that I will be having child as usual that day.

OP posts:
TheVisitor · 11/02/2011 10:59

Tell them to make other arrangements for that morning. You gave them enough notice.

Flisspaps · 11/02/2011 10:59

If you are closed and not charging for the time then it is up to them to make alternative arrangements, not you.

SnapFrakkleAndPop · 11/02/2011 11:02

Er, whoa! Reality check!

You are a self-employed business person. Your clients cannot decide you are having their children. If you are closed then you are closed, end of. If you are closed, you are not having their children. They need to make alternative arrangements. It is emphatically NOT your responsibility

I think they've fundamentally misunderstood the nature of the business relationship you have.

You won't be having that child. You're closed until whatever time you decide, from which point you're happy to have mindees again.

Stick to your guns - you're in the right.

nannyl · 11/02/2011 11:09

agree with Snap...

parents can fine someone suitable to look after their children, as with good reason, and plenty of notice, you are CLOSED!

underpaidandoverworked · 11/02/2011 11:48

So both parents are off but they still cant look after their own child?????

I have a similar problem next week, have to go to colposcopy clinic and refuse to take 2yr old mindee with me. Gave 2 mths notice of appt but still nothing sorted out - not my problem!!! My health comes first and if I develop cervical cancer because I dont attend the appt, then they'll be looking for amother cm anyway!

Sorry to be so harsh, but I really think some - not all! - parents forget that we also have a life and things we need to do for ourselves, not just for them! Hmm

MrsPW · 11/02/2011 11:59

I agree with all of the above, it's NOT your responsibilty!!!! Just be firm and tell them that you are closed for business that morning.

RosieGirl · 11/02/2011 12:23

Similar to underpaid, I had a long awaited neurology appointment, which I didn't want to go along with children, a couple of my parents looked sideways at me, one even said, I don't mind if you take him along.......

I minded as I knew I wouldn't be able to focus on my appointment.

I know it can be very frustrating, be firm, I have not had a day sick in 7 years, let anyone down, this is the first time I really needed to go.

minderjinx · 11/02/2011 13:34

You could suggest the parents book him/her into the nursery, but as everyone has said, it's not your role or your responsibility to do it for them.

Strix · 11/02/2011 14:01

I agree with what other have said in principal, but I'm not sure if I as a parent would feel one week was very much notice. If the nature of your appointment is a true emergency and something you could not have forseen before this week, I would try to be understanding. But, it would certainly soften the blow if you could point me to a childminder/nursery who would take my child in your place for the same money I would otherwise pay you. And of course I would expect not to pay you for the service which you are not providing.

So, to answer your question, I think you should do what you reasonably can to check availability and pass along information on a nursery place. But, obviously, any arrangement will actually be directly between the nursery and the parents.

ChildrenAtHeart · 11/02/2011 14:37

Strix - where does it say CM only gave a weeks notice? The appointment is next week but from the way OP phrased things I got the impression this had been arranged some time & initially the parents had made arrangements for one of them to be off to have their child but as they are now BOTH off they are saying they want to do something together without their child. OP correct me if I've misinterpreted but if this is indeed the case then I agree with everyone else. You are closed, you can provide parents with details of other local childcare service but that's where your responsibility ends.

StarExpat · 11/02/2011 15:33

I agree with Frakk. I get what Strix is saying, but the parents had initially said they wouldn't be using her service. Then changed their minds. As long as she doesn't charge for it, she should just say, sorry, I'm going to be closed until x time. What's wrong with that?

Al1son · 11/02/2011 19:35

I've had a parent try to place the ball back in my court like this when I had to close for a day for a really important appointment. She expected me to find alternative childcare for her (she is that sort anyway). I told her I would happily provide her with phone numbers for the nursery and the two other childminders in our village but that it was her responsibility to approach them about whether they could have the child.

I have had a reciprocal arrangement with another childminder in the past to cover sickness and holidays but we still expected parents to deal with bookings and payment directly rather than us arrange things between us.

Tanith · 11/02/2011 19:59

I think you really shouldn't arrange childcare for parents in this way, to be honest.
What if it doesn't work out for some reason and the parents didn't like the care you've arranged? It'd be your fault and they'd hold you responsible.

maidbloke · 11/02/2011 23:51

Just make sure you've left for your appointment that morning before they attempt to drop mindee off. Problem solved. Wink

As long as you've given them reasonable notice (~2 weeks?) I don't see what the problem is. You could give them some alternative childcare suggestions I suppose, but the parents probably know all that info anyway. Loving that they are both off but cannot possibly look after their LO. :)

SnapFrakkleAndPop · 12/02/2011 07:58

I agree with children. OP says mindees parents had arranged for one of them to be off implying plenty of notice was given but are now turning round and saying they want mindee to go anyway because they've changed their plans, which isn't the OP's problem.

thebody · 12/02/2011 11:30

your closed on that time on that day.. not your problem.. theirs...and btw how horrible they sound. poor you..parents I work with would be very supportive..

PinkChick · 15/02/2011 11:05

As others have said, you made parents aware you would be unavailable that morning. Parent agreed to take morning off. End of! They have no right yo now decide theyre both gunna make you chsnge your plans so they get a morning off together!
Put newsletter or note out ssying as already discussed you will be closed x day at y times, here is number for other cms/surestart if you still need care at this time.
If your now charging, notice is irrelevent as you could be sick with no notice at any time!

PinkChick · 15/02/2011 11:06

'not' charging, sorry cant type on iphone x

Blondeshavemorefun · 15/02/2011 14:26

you are the boss, you given them notice and told them you are shut/not working and they agreed

stick to your guns and have the time off - it is not your problem to sort out childcare for them but by all means offer phone numbers

tbh if both off, wouldnt it be nice for them to take your mindee (their dc) and have a family day out

upow hope app goes well, i have 3 colposcopys done and certainly wouldnt want a dc with me - tbh 2 of them i was given a ga

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