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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

CM's and handling naps with bad sleepers

13 replies

justasmallglass · 04/02/2011 13:58

This really isn't meant to sound patronising.

I'm back to work on Tuesday, Will probably require the services of a CN in about a month, depending on how my flexible working application goes.

DS (9 months) is a bad napper, and rarely sleeps anywhere but on me. When we saw the childminder, who seems lovely, we told her he doesn't settle too well and she appeared to be okay with it, and that she'd walk him for naps. She will also have her DS most days, who is nearly 4, and ofcourse walks are not always possible with the weather.

This is probably back to work, silly first time mum worries, but in your experiences, how are bad sleepers handled? I would hate for him to be left to cry, I guess that is my main worry.

Your experiences please!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

HingCogNeeto · 04/02/2011 14:08

she won't leave him to cry

she will keep him busy, lots of fresh air and stimulation, and will chat to you about things you do to calm and relax him, and adapt them to her setting

you will be AMAZED at how well he sleeps there as time progresses, I promise

HingCogNeeto · 04/02/2011 14:10

oh and please don't feel silly about fretting, your child is your most precious possession

Original poster

justasmallglass · 04/02/2011 14:31

Thanks hingcogneeto I know he will probably really enjoy it in the long term, but he is such a clingy baby at the moment and it doesn't make it any easier to leave him.

He cries when grandparents visit, he's like a different baby when they go. They will be having him 3 days initially, so trying to spend as much time all together as possible.

There will probably be more tears from me than him!

Thanks again

OP posts:

HingCogNeeto · 04/02/2011 14:35

bless you

it's harder for the parents

mogs0 · 04/02/2011 20:20

None of my mindees sleep in cots during the day. They all fall asleep in the buggy while we're out for a walk. Sometimes we don't get as far as the door before they fall asleep!

Panzee · 04/02/2011 20:22

My son used to be terrible at naps and would only fall asleep on me. At the CM he slept in the buggy in the house, with no bother. I never managed it!

EBDteacher · 04/02/2011 20:47

Echoing Panzee. I have trouble getting DS to nap during the day.

He is invariably having a nap in the cot at his CMs when I go to get him, having fallen asleep on the way home from their morning outing.

She clearly has him running like clockwork. I have NO IDEA how she does it- but I love her for it, DS is happy as larry despite me thinking he was probably too fragile of a soul to settle in childcare.

Good luck- it is so hard. I hope your mind is at ease very soon.

Original poster

justasmallglass · 05/02/2011 10:38

Wow, thank you all, I'm feeling much better about it now. I know they change all the time anyway, just sucha big change it seems, but I know there are plenty bigger to come in the future!

The CM seems great so far, keep telling myself it will be fine!

OP posts:

cairnterrier · 06/02/2011 21:04

My DS was 9 months when he went to the CM for the first time and he had always been fed to sleep. I got a text on the first morning to say that he had fallen asleep in her arms at 0930. He had NEVER done that before for anyone. 'Twas another 2-3 months before he would do that for me and yet he would sleep happily at his childminders without a problem.

I think that they just get used to the routine of doing things at the childminders and certainly DS is so busy whilst he's there that he's exhausted when he comes home! Good luck, it'll go really well :)

OhForBoonessSake · 06/02/2011 21:09

i started back when ds2 was 8 months old and was maxing 10 minutes sleep PER DAY!! i was dreading leaving him TBH but the childminder was great. she had another baby who was 13 months and my ds1 who was 4 at the time. she used a small living/playroom to mind in and the next room for the babies to sleep. when the little girl slept she just kept my ds with her and read to him, played games and generally kept him amused. he eventually started to sleep more and can now sleep for up to 3 hours during the day.

cupcakeandcoffee · 09/02/2011 18:55

I am a childminder and have 10 children with my assistant. Half of these are under 5 and usually as young as 9 months when they start with us.

Children go in and out of patterns of behaviour, one of which is a sleep pattern and CMs are used to adapting for this.

If your CM has more children to care for it is unlikely that she can allow your child to fall asleep on her as she needs to be able to care for the needs of the other children also.

Many of our children fall asleep in the buggy on the way home from an activity. Those that don't are put down all at the same time after lunch for a nap.

They often cry during the first few weeks until they are into the routine but crying is how they express themselves and not always a negative thing.

We do controlled crying and only put the child down for the nap if they are tired (some cry because they are tired).
We return to them every 5-10 minutes and gently "shhhhsh" them whilst we settle them back down.

Most take 20 - 30 minutes day 1, 15 minutes day 2, 10 minutes day 3 and then about 2 minutes from there.

We love all of our children and would not do anything to cause them un-necessary upset but if you never allow a child to cry, it will not allow them their voice or to learn to settle themselves.

Each parent also gets a detailed daily diary and have been very happy with our methods.
We work as a partnership and would not do any method that the parent were unhappy with.

I hope this helps.:)

bringinghomethebacon · 09/02/2011 20:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mamadoc · 09/02/2011 23:55

As long as you have discussed it with CM and ensured you are on the same page about it all will be fine. I would not have wanted any CC for my DD at all so I made sure I found a CM who could accommodate that. My CMs were a husband and wife team and they either took her for walk or rocked her in the buggy/pram at home for a few mins. They were able to gradually reduce the time they spent doing that with no tears at all until by the end she could just be put down in the cot and fall asleep. (She was also 9mo old when she started and a rubbish napper at home).

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