What do nannies do to develop and stimulate your children

[Phys]

I am currently interviewing nannies and I'm not sure whether my expectations are too high with regards to planning activities to support the development of my children. My eldest (now at school) went to a nursery for 3 years and really benefitted from a great 'learning through play' programme designed for each stage of her development. Based on this experience I have asked each candidate 'how do you structure your day?'. I was disappointed by the responses which included...we'll take it easy in the mornings and do some toddler groups....friday is always an easy day etc etc. I was expecting them to say that they would have a weekly or monthly written plan of various activities to support my 9 month old baby's development whether it be a walk in the park, toddler groups, messy play, learning about colours, etc. I need to be confident that a nanny is spending quality time with my baby particularly as the thought of returning to work is a very daunting one. What can I expect? Help!!!

As a nanny, I don't have a set schedule of what we do, esp for the little ones. We learn through every day activities. My 17 month old charge knows his colours (red, blue, green, yellow, black, white, purple) and numbers up to 5 (understands, not just by rote learning) and some letters. We read a lot, play games, go on outings etc. As he gets older, I will start a more 'formal' focusing on a specific topic (like farm animals, or weather etc)

Each month I do research various activites that I know will help my charges development and during the month I will teach him new songs, finger plays, activities etc. This month we were doing a lot of threading and colour matching. But I don't write down a planned outline of the month. We do do things like library every week, mom and tot class, playdates, outings etc on a regular basis. I have drawn up a list of suitable activities to do with different aged chidlren, but I don't do them with every child I nanny for. Also, depending on what is happening at home (ie at the moment, the family is doing extensive renovations to the house) so the kitchen and most of our garden as well as a good deal of the living area is out of commission! We have to plan our activities around that.

HTH
Sarah

I must add that I didn't sit him down to learn colours - we learn them during meals (peas are green, pumpkin orange etc) during walks, choosing clothes and so on. Same for counting etc

Shes 9 months old FGS surley all she wants is a nice happy chatty nanny .One who will talk to her and take her out for fresh air teaching her things along the way and feed her suitable food freshly cooked ,Show her suitable books and toys .She is in her own home not an office .

I think it's a been extreme to expect all that. If you want that kind of structure, why don't you put him in a nursery?
You may find a nanny who will do everything you want but I wouldn't have thought you would have a very happy baby,tbh.

The phrase 'hot-housing' springs to mind. Not much help i know but my opinion all the same

Phys - see if you can get the gov pack called "Birth to Three Matters" - it will give you lots of ideas of a framework for your 9mo

It is a well researched and comprehensive pack which addresses the needs of the under 3's

Phys, what do you do with your little one. If you do all of the things that you say you want your nanny to do, then Nursery is the place for you. If you don't do all of those things, then perhaps a childminder is the place. 1 to 1 and all of that. Are you wanting the person to live in or not.

As an ex-nanny, I would say at this age (and perhaps any age) love and fun was infinitely more important than a programme of activities. Your nanny should not be filling a teaching role, but that of a cheerful and caring companion to your child's play.

Babies who are loved, learn. They are programmed to do it. She is only nine months old! My dd is 8months old and she learns by being in the room with me and her four year old brother, by me singing to her and by grabbing the cat as it passes, by going out in her pram and having strangers chat to her. I certainly don't have a 'programme of activities'! She's my baby!
And I never had anything of the sort with my son and he turned four a couple of weeks ago and can read, knew his colours at two (from looking at the cars as we walked down the road mainly) and so many other things, without a 'programme of activities'. I truly believe that if a baby is with someone who loves them and is interested in them, they will learn all the time. They don't need to be taught. I do know going back to work is hard, but remember if you weren't, would you have a written plan of activities? I doubt it. But your baby would be fine. She needs love, cuddles, healthy food, chat and laughter.

Thanks for all the advice, particularly fron SAnanny. The prospect of leaving my baby while I go out to work is terrifying and heart wrenching and like all mothers I want the best for him....a loving, stimulating environment. The guilt is bad enough and the least I can do is find a nanny who can offer him a happy, fun experience. References to hothousing are misguided and upsetting I'm afraid.

I don't think anyone meant to upset you, Phys, but some of us maybe felt a little concerned that you seemed to be focusing on the nanny teaching your child in a rather regimented fashion, when most of us feel a relaxed and caring atmosphere would benefit your baby more. Of course it is up to you who you choose, but you did ask for, and receive, opinions.

Phys I'm sorry if you feel that my comment is 'misguided' but it is my opinion and this is after all a public forum and because of this you will get many different opinions.

I dont think it is misguided as you may think ....i had worked in nurseries specialising in the under 3's care for 13 years before having ds. And over the years have become appalled at the amount of emphasis place on teaching rather than caring and nurturing of the under 3's. And because of this i plan never to go back and have decided to childmind instead where i feel children can be children and not little national cirriculum turnouts. Again this is just my opinion.

As many have said i think a nanny who is loving, caring and exposes your children to new experiences will learn through play. A nanny that is worried whether she has covered all learning criteria may be less able to bond with your little one.

Hope i have explained myself a little better this time . Good luck

I think Phys was worried by the responses she had received. If the applicant had described how they plan to encourage the total development instead of having a set 'curriculum' then she probably would have been happier. From my understanding of her post, the answers she got were pretty vague.

SANanny I'm intrigued at the idea of a 17mnth old learning colours and counting - how do you do that?

dd has been doing counting to 5 since about 17mths, it can be done! She is 22 months now and knows her colours and can count to 10. You can just do the counting with stairs and stuff, and the colours, once they know words for things, you can then add to it, as in 'blue cup' dd actually just came out with blue herself one day - I didn't know she had picked up on it, then I thought I'd try her and she in fact knew red, green, yellow and white too

WOW -am v impressed. Your dd sounds like a clever little cookie . Its amazing what babies no that we don't give them credit for. I'll have to try it out on some 17mnth olds I know soon.

Phys, tbh if a nanny told me she was going to have a written plan of activities to support development of a 9 month old baby, then I would be very surprised and really rather disconcerted. I would think that she/he didn't really underdstand what it meant to look after a baby of that age. I would be very much more concerned that she was a warm and loving and trustworthy person, giving the baby lots of cuddles, fun and appropriate stimulation.

if you make things all regimented and strict then it becomes too much of a 'job' rather tthen a want to care which is waht nannying is.

It should be fun and relaxing for the nanny and them the child too will have fun and be relaxed and at 9 months isn't that more important then ramming development pressures on to them??

The nanny creates the atmosphere so she needs to do (to a certain degree) what she feels she needs to do in order to make the relationship between parent, carer and child happy and comforting.

Don't forget you are paying them because they should know what to do, that is a good nanny. Lots of instructions can ruim that.

Whoops - "know" not "no"

I second katymac's suggestion.
Something too rigid doesn't allow for the child's individual stages of development. An approach where the baby's own new achievements and current schemas are observed and encouraged as the nanny goes along would be great and would allow you to see whether the nanny was close and happy and having fun interacting with your child.

Most of child development is genetic, and as long as development is not being stunted by neglect, abuse, or malnutrition, your baby will develope whether he/she is specifically encouraged with 'tasks' or just chatted with.

I agree, if you are hiring a nanny she will surely know what she is doing.

I think a monthly written plan of activities is odd, and most nannies will think it odd for a baby, which is probably why they floundered a bit.

Also, if you sit a very young child down to do 'tasks' for particular developmental milestone, they get bored, cross and unhappy.

I think how would you structure your day is a reasonable question. They should be able to describe what they expect to do on a typical day, which will still be set around eating and naps. They should maybe give examples of things they would do or have done with previous chage like visiting the park, messy play etc.

I think maybe a joint diary would help. You can record things like appointments, how sleeps at night going, food likes discoveries and nanny can record outings, activities, sleep patterns and eating habits as well. Will help both of you to keep track and could include emergency numbers and medication records. Some nannies will love this and write lots some will only rite the bare minimum. If this idea appeals see how they react to this at interview.

I wouldn't expect formal laid out plans at any age, you really want a warm, fun, friendly, genuine nanny. I would also look for commen sense, experience of this age group, first aid training.

chage should be gharges doh!

or charges even don't hire me .

Phys, I must admit I think some of the posts on here are a bit harsh. I think if you have education goals that you feel are appropriate to a nine month old then you have every right to expect an employee to carry them out. But, I wonder if what you are seeking is to dictate the schedule or to just be kept informed of activities and progress on a daily or possibly weekly schedule. What if you had more of a nanny diary where you could be informed of what they did each day rather than having it planned before it happens?

Then you could have a weekly or monthly review with nanny where you go over the diary and say oh I like this and that and oh you had a really good idea there but I'd actually like you to do a bit more of x.

Perhaps, you should be asking more general questions at an interview about educational philiosphies and experience. Ask the what age appropriates activities are, how they feel about telly, at what age should a baby leard to crawl, speak, at what age can a child start to be told "No.", and so on.

I'm a big fan of the nanny diary. Mine is a contractual obligation. My last nanny refused to do it. My current nanny has embraced it with admirable enthusiasm. In fact, she is quite artsy/crafty and is going to start making them to sell. If you want one, I can put you in touch with her.