Are you not entirely happy with your CM/ nursery ...

[stereo]

not because they're not taking care of your DC but just because they're not you? I'm really struggling with this and beginning to think I'll never make a decision as no-one will give DS the attention I will!

It must be hard when you feel like this. Your childminder will not be able to give the attention that you will as you are mummy.

I am a childminder of FIVE children and mum of FOUR. I am very fussy about my kids and I also ensure that I look after the minded kids like I will my own. Not because I trying to be their mum but because I want to give them the best care I can give.

How long have you been using your childminder? Is your little one a baby?

I remember leaving my oldest child now 15 with someone years ago. I know he was alright but I missed him when I went back to work. It got easier after a short time.

Are you considering taking your child away from the childminder?

I looked after a little girl in the past, when she first started coming, her mum would phone quite a lot while she was with me. I had to be understanding as it was the first time she left her child with someone outside the family for so long.

Yet now I look after a 14mth old who I love to bits. I am not her mum but I still will look after her well until mum comes to colletct her. Mum trusts me and thats what matters.

Have a think about what you what to happen next. Your childminder may pick up that you are not happy with leaving your child with her.

All the best in your decision making

Then you haven't found the right one yet . Keep looking!

We aren't there to replace you in your childs life but to work alongside you in making their days fun and stimulating. I treat all children like I would my own - infact if anything, I was stricter with own DS than with mindees .

I see it as an honour when parents place their child with me - entrusting me with the care of the most precious thing they have . The right one will come along - but you have to be prepared to 'let go' a little too.

I know exactly where you are coming from - my ds is now 16, when he was 2 he went to a cm. I really liked her and the care she provided but she would tell me about what they'd been up to - be that the library for stories or the park to feed the ducks and I would think "how lovely, but I wish that had been me taking him!" About 6 months later I registered as a cm myself. I did work with children anyway, so it wasn't a career change for me.

I always know that I've got it right and things are going well with parents when they say to me that they don't need to even think about their children when they are at work. That's not to say that my cm was doing anything wrong - it was me that needed to be looking after my own lo instead of other people's (I worked in a sports club creche).

Give it time, it is hard as a parent to let your children 'go' but if you have good childcare in place it does get easier.

Stereo, I was feeling exactly like you so I decided to find a CM who could give my dd something I can't. In our case, she's a native speaker of a foreign language and will only speak to my dd in that language so she learns it too.