After school care for secondary school pupils

[LozB1]

My DS is currently in year 5 and goes to an after school club run by an outside agency but situated in the grounds of his school. Starting to panic about 18mths time when he goes to high school. Don't feel he will be old enough (youngest in his year) to stay home alone - most nights I am home by 4ish but 1 night a week I have a staff meeting and don't get in until 5.30. Thinking a childminder would be the best option even though I know he will hate the idea. Just wondered what other people have done.

Seriously???

You won't leave him for less tha an hourat age 11/12. Maximum of 2 hours once a week?

Is there any reason he can't be left?

Maybe a CM for the one night you are late, or maybe he could go to the library at school and you could collect him later, or make an arrangement with another Mum, so she does the late night and you have her child on another night? He should be alright til 4pm, but only you know what he is like.

When you put it like that it does seem a bit OTT!

He does have some behaviour problems at school and some very very life threatening food allergies. Currently dosen't seem to think about consequences of his behaviour and just worry that he'd try something he shouldn't and end up regretting it! Although he would probably just be glued to the telly or x-box and too lazy to even make a drink! HA HA! LOL!

Thanks for messages so far feeling my dilemma is just me being a worry worm! It is 18months away! I've been worring abt high school since before he went to primary! Need to chill out a bit I think!

ok well thats different, i was basing my views on my own kids, if you have genuine worries maybe a mature local babysitter?

Yep agree on the cm but see howhe is in a year or so

Depending on the finishing time for the secondary school, and the travelling time from there to your home, he may not be home till 4ish anyway.

I would wait and see. I would have thought that he would have put his foot down and refused to go to a CM.

Thank you for all the comments. I agree that maybe I should reassess the situation nearer the time. I have noted when I actually got home this week and 4.30 was the earliest and 6 on my late night. The school he will go to has an early start and finishes at 2.30 he would be home within 20 mins tops. I think my situation is exaserbated because we have no family living near by and all the neighbours get home even later than me so if there were to be any problems he really would have to manage alone. He will be 11 just a week before he starts school so socially he is younger than some of his peers. God I sound like my mother!! My birthday is 3 days before DS and I hated my mum stopping me do things because I was 'younger'! Soz mum!

I think 11 (you have said he will be 11 the week before he starts high school) is still very young to get left alone for 3 or four hours a day.

I am a cm and i mind a boy who was 11 in oct as he is far too young to be left on his own. He is in p7.

My best friend went to a cm until she was 17, when she left school and went to uni. Not because she was young or anything but it suited her and her mother better. CM stayed right next to our school, she lived miles away, so she wld go to cm after school and once her mum was finished work (teacher) she would come and pick her up and take her home, saved her trying to get on different buses etc. She loved it.

You will be amazed at how much difference there will be in 18 months time, honest! I always remember looking at DS1 at the beginning of Y6 thinking "he won't be ready for high school" (an August birthday), then half way through that year most of the kids were clearly SO over primary school and ready to move on.

If you really feel he's not ready to be left when he starts could you find someone who would come to yours for a couple of hours - maybe a Uni student who could help with homework so that by the time you got home that would be done and you could enjoy each other's company? I would be very reluctant to send a kid that age to a setting where they would probably be by far the oldest unless it was a CM you had used previously. If you felt he might be ok until 4.30 but no later maybe you could find an after school activity for that evening?

You need to remember it is against the law to leave any child home alone under the age of 15. 11 is definitely too young.

How about an after-school club at the school, if there is one? DD2 works at the one at her school (she is a 6th former) and says they have a couple of year 7s who can't get home alone because of difficult travel arrangements, though it is primarily for children at a local primary.

Though I don't think it's really necessary, but obviously if you feel your son needs it, then you have to do what is best you him.

Sorry that should say 'best for him'.

It is not against the law. And the op posted nearly two months ago.