what is the difference between a nanny and an au pair?

[queenballerina]

my friend keeps wanting to send me an au pair from italy... do they have to live with you, even if she has family who lives near me?

what is their salary? how many hours?

I live in London and have found a live out nanny for 11 per hour.

Are aupairs less? can they be live out? are they capable of watching a baby?

i have no clue about these things...

If childcare in your home were a spectrum then your typical au pair would be at one end and a nanny at the other.

Au pairs are generally young, inexperienced, unqualified there primarily to learn english and work as a means to that end. They typically do 5 hours a day for £70 a week (living in) and generally can have sole charge of school aged children before/after school or very short periods with a baby but shouldn't be used for extended periods.

Then in the middle you have more experienced/potentially qualified in their own country foreign childcare's who want to work as an au pair to learn English, or EMT au pairs who want to gain childcare experience. They cost slightly more, typically just under the tax threshold, and might be okay with extended sole charge/care of a baby.

Then you have unqualified but experienced chikdcarers (including some ex au pairs who want to go into nannying) and newly qualified childcarers in the price band above who will work full days, can live 'in or out but cost more for the longer hours/more responsibility and additional skills.

Finally you have very experienced, probably qualified, career nannies who typically live out and earn top whack.

If the nanny is quoting £11net/hour then that's the top end of the spectrum and probably completely capable of sole charge of a baby. An au pair I wouldn't personally use for sole charge of a baby unless they were qualified in their own country and had some experience of English childcaring styles. There are significant cultural differences - for example formula preparation - that I wouldn't be happy risking and a typical au pair would know what to do with a baby all day very day. Au pairs come here for the language and the experience, they want to go to classes and make friends. Those who work a lot, unless they're childcarers already, often become unhappy.

Any live out childcarer needs to be paid at least min wage so a live out au pair type person would be more, and you could get a better nanny for not much more (£11 being v expensive!).

Don't feel pushed into having an au pair. What do you need childcare for?

I need childcare for my 11 month old, 2 days a week, as I would like to work part time.

I want a fluent italian speaker because I speak italian and would like my baby to be bi lingual too.

I am worried that the cost of such childcare would make my job not really worth it as I do not earn that much...

I am just trying to find the right solution

IMO 2 full days is stretching the capabilities of most au pairs but it does depend on the individual. Live in or out it'll cost you in excess of £100 a week - if not living with you based on £6/hour gross (very low!) and 10 hour days it's £120 in salary plus maybe £5-10 in kitty for activities/expenses. If living with you then £70 pocket money for 20 hours (long days, reduces the time for English classes) plus heating/lighting/food/mobile phone/travelcard or bus pass/kitty for outings when working which all adds up. Au pairs often come with a lot of hidden extras.

In any case if they're not living with you they're not really an au pair and your job isn't an au pair job so I wouldn't advertise it as such, otherwise you set up false expectations (which is the biggest cause of problems later IMO and IME).

If you want an Italian speaker then recruiting from Italy is a good idea (although they'll still need enough English to cope in emergencies etc) but I'd look very carefully at the person you're getting and whether they're capable of extended sole charge of an 11month old. Most au pairs aren't.

The other thing to consider is whether you plan to pay them with childcare vouchers/tax credits. That would require them to register with OFSTED which, for recently arrived foreign nationals/anyone who's spent a significant amount of time outside the country, is a fairly tortuous process taking around 6 months by the time you've done the courses etc, and apparently a young person (under 21) will find it hard to get the insurance required.