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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Original poster

Would you as a child minder want to murder me?

37 replies

Honeydragon · 05/01/2011 10:03

Managed to find a wonderful child minder... she is awesome. Left dd with her yesterday for 3 hours, dd due to do a full day friday and I start work Monday.

Work only finally confirmed my hours after chasing and chasing them yesterday. They then called at 5pm last night having changed them again and have requested overtime and shift changes in my first 3 weeks back.

Result is I can't afford to go back to work. I am going to have to resign today and work out what notice I owe them if any. I am devastated. But the only way we can manage financially is if I try to build up my work portfolio I do at home in the evenings / night and leave my day job.

Legally what do I have to pay her? And will she hate me for ever more?? Sad

Please tell me that this does occasionally happen.

OP posts:
UniS · 05/01/2011 10:08

It happens occasionally. You may need to pay/ use a notice period, check your contract. But above all, talk to your CM and ask them.

Bramshott · 05/01/2011 10:13

I would imagine you will have to use/pay her for a month if that's your agreed notice period.

Is the work hours situation really so bad that you can't go back at all?

If you are trying to build up freelance work, would it be easier to use the CM say 1 day a week to enable you to do that?

A "wonderful childminder" can be hard to find . . .

GoldFrakkincenseAndMyrrh · 05/01/2011 10:13

She won't hate you, it happens.

Give as much notice as possible, check your contract what the notice period is - typically 4 weeks - and be very apologetic! Also recommend her to anyone you know who's looking to help her fill the space.

Original poster
Honeydragon · 05/01/2011 10:19

I only signed the contract yesterday -- so assume I owe her 4 weeks?

OP posts:
moogster1a · 05/01/2011 10:22

usually 4 weeks notice but in my contracts I have a settling in period of the first 2 weeks where either side can terminate the contract with immediate effect.
Read the contract, we all work slightly differently!

onlyjuststillme · 05/01/2011 10:33

look into your maternity rights at work. If you dont return to work for 3 monthd you way have to pay back some of your maternity pay. If this is the case you may wish to return to work for a few months and still use your cm for that period?

Original poster
Honeydragon · 05/01/2011 10:44

I only recieved smp so they owe me money at present not the other way round.

OP posts:
Original poster
Honeydragon · 05/01/2011 10:51

Bugger just realised I haven't signed contract yet as yesterday was a "getting to know session"

it says

There will be a trial period of 1 month for the child minder or parent to decide whether the child suitably fits into the circle of child minded children. If it is necessary to end the agreement sooner or straight away, then payment in lieu of notice has to be made. In ordinary circumstances both the child minder and parent should serve the appropriate notice.

It doesn't state how much though?

OP posts:
minderjinx · 05/01/2011 10:54

Are you sure you can't afford to work? Assuming you don't have other children you have not mentioned, I'd be astonished if you pay your childminder more than you earn - I don't know anyone around here who charges near the national minimum wage. When people say they can't afford to work, they often mean they can't bear to spend a big chunk of their earnings on their child's care, but it's often a situation to grin and bear with the longer term in mind. If you are relatively lowly paid, then you will get tax credits for childcare, and your free nursery entitlement isn't that far away. Think very carefully about throwing up the chance of employment in the current climate.

UniS · 05/01/2011 11:05

If I read OP correctly, overtime and shift changes would mean working out side hours CM is booked for and not in CM booked hours. Paying twice for childcare could well take childcare costs over earnings.

Original poster
Honeydragon · 05/01/2011 11:10

minderjinx

You are absolutely right.

I have a ds too, my cm is very reasonable in price. The problem is that I haven't started back yet and they are already wanting shift changes and overtime. Meaning extra childcare. I was prepared to work for less to keep my job, but it's worked out a lot less. It is also the travel cost and journey time that are eating up further income.

I have done everything to make this work with dh support, even though he admitted he'd be happier if I resigned. What has come as a major shock in my new contract is I probably will not be allowed any time off on the dates my child minder has her holiday as they are classed as detrimental to the business. And if my child is sick no longer will have the option of taking holiday, it must be unpaid leave. If I made the hours up it wouldn't be granted till the following months pay so I'd be terrified I wouldn't have enough to pay cm. Sad

This has all come as a real shock yesterday.

OP posts:
Original poster
Honeydragon · 05/01/2011 11:11

Unis - that is exactly the issue.

The cm is wonderful, I feel like such an arsehole.

OP posts:
turnitup · 05/01/2011 11:24

As a CM I would feel disappointed but would feel no bad feeling towards you.

Hope you sort it out.

minderjinx · 05/01/2011 11:25

Maybe UniS, though it would only mean paying twice for the notice period in that case, even if none of the hours booked are now needed. We also don't know if any of the hours booked would still be needed, or if the childminder is willing/able to make any further changes to hours/sessions.

cinpin · 05/01/2011 11:30

Talk to her asap

minderjinx · 05/01/2011 11:30

Sorry all - crossposted; just can't keep up! Good luck with whatever you decide to do Honeydragon

Mum2Luke · 05/01/2011 11:32

I would be the same as turnitup, just disappointed but its not your fault that work had changed hours which I'm sure they are not supposed to do anyway.

Don't feel too bad, just explain the situation and I'm sure she'll be ok with it, most are. I am a cm because I cannot afford to go out to work and I have a parent who I have to frequently chase for payment.

Good luck!

Original poster
Honeydragon · 05/01/2011 11:46

I am I'm waiting for work to contact me to advise my notice period

OP posts:
Original poster
Honeydragon · 05/01/2011 13:11

Right have spoken to work.

The only way I can feasibly work their new request would be to pay cm for 4 days care each week, but only use 3 as they cannot guarantee on the weeks they may need me to swap I can work an extra day as overtime iyswim, as that authorisation comes from higher powers that be. That means taking an extra £110 per month of my income for "just in case".

I have to resign Sad

OP posts:
Blu · 05/01/2011 13:19

:( Really sorry work have messed you about like this.
They should have told you clearly in advance what was needed / required by them.

Ellielou02 · 05/01/2011 13:25

Can you not speak to a union? I would think if you have childcare commitments does your work not need to give you 28 days notice if they are going to change your agreed working pattern?? I might be talking out of my arse but am sure there is something. Hope you get it sorted :)

Original poster
Honeydragon · 05/01/2011 13:35

No union, and tbf I put in a flexi request to adjust my hours from 20 to 19, they aren't being totally unreasonable in their request it is only supposed to be occasionally - but I cannot meet it financially.

They said things were delayed because of the bank holidays Hmm and they get a high level of resignations at xmas to process - suddenly I can see why.

OP posts:
Blondeshavemorefun · 05/01/2011 14:03

i would talk to your cm and see if you can come to some agreement over the 4th day - it may be that she has spaces for the 2 other days and could fit you in

how often would you work 4 days rather than 3

it may still be worth it iyswim

could mil/family help out the 4th day

how much notice do work have to give you to work the 4th day as overtime

or have i got the wrong end of the stick

Original poster
Honeydragon · 05/01/2011 14:58

cm could possibly do it occasionally but would risk putting her over, but no guarantee. Basically work want me to be as flexible as I was before dd, ds was in school so I was able to juggle more. I have spoken to hr to see what we can do... they have tried their best. As of 2.30 today I am unemployed for the first time. I now have to speak to CM Sad

OP posts:
looneytune · 05/01/2011 16:07

Was going to suggest a variation which usually would be granted in this situation but obviously she might not have wanted to do that anyway. Anyway, I see you've sorted it now. I'm sure the CM will be fine. If it had been me, I'd have no charged anything and although disappointed, wouldn't have blamed you at all! :)