Where does the problem lie?

[SnoozeQ]

I have a situation where my daughter, almost 3, is telling me one thing and her nursery tell me another... I don't know where the problem is. Shes been at nursery since February this year and prior to that a childminder. I have never been 100% about the nursery and have already arranged to change. If I believe what my daughter is telling me, I would think she is being bullied but I am all too aware that I may not be getting the whole story, however when nursery is approached they seem dumbfounded. I could understand if they had some response even if they said there was a six of one, half a dozen of another situation, or even that my daughter had to work on her social skills but they are adamant that she is always happy and sociable. It is driving me mad, I just want to get to the bottom of it, and help my daughter learn how to cope with the situation.

Do you feel able to tell us more detail about what your daughter is telling you?

For example, is she being bullied by children or staff, and what is the nature of the bullying?

Its the children she mentions, but I think she feels that the adults do not address it. I'm not ruling out that perhaps she could be starting something and only remembering the retaliation she received but without imput from the nursery I can not know for definate. She says that the other children don't want to be friends with her, but has this week told me a boy has put both hands around her neck.

certainly the 'not wanting to be friends with her' can be raised with straff - can you make an appointment with her keyworker/nursery manager to discuss ways to support dd in social situations

the hands around her neck is a bit horrid because one would expect staff to be alert to this sort of thing

again, raise with KW/manager

however, 3 year olds are still learning about how to behave appropriately, and I hesitate to call a 3 year old a bully, they are more likely to be impulsive and thoughtless (very much into me, that's mine, gerrorf kind of thing)

good luck