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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

Nanny always late

23 replies

BelladiMamma · 29/09/2010 20:26

What would you have done?

I have just had to part ways - by mutual agreement - with a nanny who was always late. First it was 5 mins, then 10 mins, then last week when I had a big work day (- this was last Friday), 20 mins late that particular morning. I spoke to her about it each time and she said that it was traffic / so sorry / would try to be more punctual.

I didn't mind the first few times as she was very sweet with the children and always seemed flustered and embarassed, but on Monday she was late to collect my son from school (20 mins) and was in such a state she parked illegally then left my 4 yr old in the car while she went in to get him. FWIW, his classroom is approx 500m away from where she left the car and she would not have been able to see her to supervise her. She has been with us part-time for a year, first as a mother's help cum babysitter then since May as our p/t nanny. We had teething issues in May / June, not for punctuality but for general organisation and ability to look after both without leaving the other to his / her own devices (they are 4 & 7).

The children have been non-stop chatting about her today because they expected to see her and I have told them she was busy with her studies (true).

I feel a bit mixed up because I always prefer to stick to the devil you know and give people 2nd chances, but I have become very uncompromising with the childrens' care. I think I'mright, but I'm still interested to hear what others would have done ...

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HarrietTheSpy · 29/09/2010 20:29

The mornings are v. annoying but you JUST CAN'T have a nanny who is also starting to be late at the other end of the day, i.e. 20 minutes late for school. They would go ballistic and all sorts of aggro would start for you. She sounds too disorganised to be very reliable. That would have been the breaking point for me too.

IUsedToBeFab · 29/09/2010 20:30

I would have fired her on the spot for leaving my child in the car after being late and parking dangerously.

Original poster

BelladiMamma · 29/09/2010 20:35

... I was quite surprised that I had it in me to tell her to go ... I was able to do it by mutual consent so that I didn't have a tears fest on all sides (me, her, the children) but as soon as she told me what she'd done that was it ...

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Original poster

BelladiMamma · 29/09/2010 20:36

Plus getting charged for Late Stay, DS not knowing what was going on ... and DD quite capable of letting herself out of the car and wandering off down the road ...

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mrsshackleton · 29/09/2010 20:47

As someone who had lots of support on here when I fired my nanny on Monday, absolutely you did the right thing. Punctuality is a dealbreaker. good luck finding someone else

Blu · 29/09/2010 20:48

You can't employ a nanny who is regularly late and picks your child up late from school etc etc - way too unreliable and disorganised. Sad if she was nice, but that is nowhere near the extent of a v important job description.

Original poster

BelladiMamma · 29/09/2010 21:02

Good, I am glad you all would have done the same.

DH said he was just pleased that he wasn't the guilty party- or, as he put it - even I wouldn't have done that!

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nannylocal · 29/09/2010 21:03

I think that's reasonable if it's an ongoing thing. I wouldn't have got rid of her for picking up late once, if she had a good reason (and hadn't parked illegaly and left the other in the car!). I was late picking one of mine up from school once (about half hour late!). It was when we had that really heavy snow and everything that could go wrong, went wrong. I did phone the school to let them know we were on our way and would be late. I'd have been gutted if i'd have been sacked as a result!

Original poster

BelladiMamma · 29/09/2010 21:06

nannylocal - I think that your case was quite justifiable ... there was no reason for her to be late. She left here at 1.30pm with DD for a 4pm pick-up. She took DD to the library (between here and school) and somehow she got to school v late. She said that DD got tired and wasn't being co-operative. DD grinned and said that she loved nanny's car, it was just the right size for her and really cool ...

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Original poster

BelladiMamma · 29/09/2010 21:09

I know some people do leave kids in cars when doing school pick up - I've seen it done a couple of times - but after the ongoing lateness issue, it was the straw ... and (altho this is prob another thread altogether) I don't think you should leave children in car out of sight and in public place.

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nannylocal · 29/09/2010 21:16

It seems like she's just really, really bad at time management! I think you did the right thing, being 20mins late for no reason at all isn't a good sign! And i agree with you about leaving kids in the car as well....

Original poster

BelladiMamma · 29/09/2010 21:20

Thank you. Bizarre how it all snowballed in a matter of days, she used to be 5 mins late on a regular basis and I just learnt to live with it. We had a very bad experience when DD was 1 and we found out nanny was hitting her. So I wwas soft on this one because she was lovely with the children ... but ... being late became too risky an issue ... I am guessing something else is going on in her life that she didn't feel she wanted to share with me.

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magicOC · 29/09/2010 21:23

Your nanny has a duty to provide safe, reliable care for your children, on both counts she has failed so you were well within your rights to fire her.

Under NO circumstances should any child in your care be left un-attended, I know some parents who do this on our school run and very foolish it is too, but, it is their own children they are leaving not one they have responsibility for on a proffessional basis.

Lateness - it happens, but, time and time again is just being slack and very iresponsible. It takes me 6mins to get to work most days, but, I always leave 15/20 mins early as I can never be sure of traffic, even I have been late once or twice over the years (weather, accidents, heavy traffic), it can't be helped sometimes. Being late constantly, it's as if she doesn't care.

You def did right to let her go.

magicOC · 29/09/2010 21:26

Pls excuse spelling errors in previous post, having a rough day.

Haliborange · 29/09/2010 21:26

I would have got rid.
Punctuality goes with reliability and is indicative of how seriously the nanny takes her job IMO. The dangerous parking and leaving a child unattended would have been gross misconduct to me.
It's a pain but you'll find someone better and everything will be fine.

Original poster

BelladiMamma · 29/09/2010 21:32

It's going in the next list of do's and don't's - never thought to put it in because trained nannies ought to know that they should be on time and not leave children unattended?

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magicOC · 29/09/2010 21:35

Bellad - she doesn't have to be trained, it's common sense (or at least I thought it was).

Was she OFSTED registered?

If the answer is yes, then i'm sure they would be interested to know about it.

Original poster

BelladiMamma · 29/09/2010 21:39

You're right - it is common sense, but I think I took that for granted too much with her.

She hasn't been registered as was p/t nanny, p/t studying for degree in social work. Did NNEB equivalent 3 years ago. Glowing references from parent I know from school - BUT as a mother's help. When I micro-managed her she was fine, but as soon as sole charge started, she was obviously under pressure.

I think she's right to pursue another career, a little worrying that it's social work which also requires a modicum of common sense??

BTW the nasty hitter was OFSTED registered and I reported her.

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magicOC · 29/09/2010 21:48

Well done for reporting the hitter Bellad.

People like them give nannies a bad name.

Hope you have better luck next time.

Possibly throw some senarios at the candidate and see how she responds on the spot.

I'm a nanny and even I do this with potential employers for important issues.

If they don't expect the question, you will get a good feel for how genuine the answer is.

surrealreality · 29/09/2010 22:24

A nanny who is bad at time management is a waste of space. In my experiences with SS she should be just fine in that job.
If you need sole charge then you need somebody competent who can at least organise their day to get to work on time and pick up your dc on time unless there are real extenuating circumstances.
Dangerous parking and leaving child unattended in dangerously parked car is gross misconduct. It comes back to her bad time management though and leaving other child at school not knowing what was going on or if anybody was coming for her is a distressing situation to leave a seven year old in.

I think you did the right thing and I'm a nanny

Blondeshavemorefun · 29/09/2010 22:49

yes you were right to fire her and under my contract if i was continually late then i would lose my job

but im also guilty of parking illegally on yellow lines - i do it every morning (as does my mb if doing school run) as the school my mb chose, may be private but doesnt have its own car park, so all park as and when and hope a traffic warden doesnt come down

Emmagrace2000 · 30/09/2010 00:41

Im sorry but im a Nanny & have been with my family for over 2 years & have NEVER been late for my 7.30am start, even in the really bad snow i set off extra early to ensure being there on time. Getting to school is no problem either as i always allow for busy traffic, I would rather be sat at the school in the car for ten mins rather than be late. Total disorganisation, & as for leaving the child in the car, No Never!! you did the right thing in firing her, I dont think she had the right qualities for the job, she may of being a lovely sweet girl, but you need more than that when entrusting them with your children.
Put it behind you & move on! im sure the perfect Nanny for you is waiting to be found! My family & I are perfect together, all singing from the same song sheet! it does make life so much easier!
Goodluck in finding your new Nanny.

Original poster

BelladiMamma · 30/09/2010 11:12

Out of curiosity just checked nasty hitter and she is now readvertising herself as a registered cm.

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