Should I change nanny?

[Simic]

We have had our nanny since January. Her hours are five days a week, 8am until 2pm. She looks after my 19 month old son while my four year old is at preschool.
I think she is good with my son and he seems to love her, but she is impossible with me and my husband.
She always arrives late. The idea is that she comes at 8am and looks after the little one so that my husband has his hands free to get my daughter ready and take her to preschool (nanny says my daughter doesn't want her to take her to preschool - and to be honest, she's right). However, she never gets there before 8.15 so my husband always gets dd ready late so he's always late for work. We spoke to her about this together and explained to her that it was really a problem for him. Her response was "I won't come at 8am until you get your child ready quicker". The contract does say 8am but we didn't push it as we didn't want her being angry with us and taking it out on ds.
Most mornings she arrives and announces to us and dd that she is in a bad mood. She tells me all about how the world is against her - and usually I am the cause of this. She then snaps at dd to be quiet because she's in such a bad mood. She criticises me constantly to my face and she has also spoken to my neighbours about how "problematic" I am (for example, I took ds out in the pushchair without a cosy-toes foot bag thing when she thought it was too cold for him, my neighbour replied that in her opinion it was still too warm weather for a cosy-toes and nanny replied to her that she would have to see how she should deal with me). She has even told me that a picture we have on the wall is "stupid".
I try to be friendly to try to get her to be a bit more cheerful. I listen to her problems.
I have now finally (after 9 months) found someone else who seems like a good alternative. The thing is that with my son, the present nanny is lovely. She is cheerful, caring, plays with him nicely from what I have observed. She won't go out for trips really because she can't manage it (if you lived somewhere else I could take him out for trips more easily) and she won't go out when the playground might be "dirty". But, he really likes her and is used to her. She takes him to a playgroup, reads loads of books with him, dances round the house with him. She never makes him lunch (although this was in the job description) but she says that in her opinion it's ok if he eats at 2pm when I get home - she gives him banana and bread roll during the morning.
Is it better to change because then I will be more relaxed and feel less attacked, or is it better to stay with her because after all ds is the important one here and a) change will be disconcerting for him and b) I don't know if the new nanny will be as good with him?
Sorry for writing so much! Please help!

Oh, and OP:

Don't even thinking about listening to that blather from your parents: "You can do a lot worse."

We heard the same thing from my mother. Parents often seem to like 'older' nannies. The only people who matter are you and your DH (not even the MN-ers!! ) Get rid if you're unhappy.

Blondes, I'm surprised you don't get to work at 7:58, 7:59.

well maybe 7.59

i had visions of you getting there 10/15mins earlier than start time

You know me so well - though actually it does vary depending on the traffic. I allow 30 mins to travel the 8 miles, so typically do arrive 10mins early.

i do know you well

and do you go in the house/or wait down the road mning reading a mag for 10mins

I have noticed recently that there is a term posh employment agencies use instead of 'employer'. It's 'principle' as in 'the principle needs to be satisfied with your work' or 'consider the principle's attitudes towards x'.

I think that's an interesting linguistic shift, but a valid one (i think it might come from the bodyguard industry, actually). You are the Principle here, and the nanny's job is a) to make sure you are happy with her work, and b) the welfare of your children. She has failed on both counts and is apparently negligent. I think you should let me go immediately, although I fully understand how scary this can seem at the time, being well known on MN for putting up with daft 'aporths for far too long in the past!

I just wanted to say thanks to everyone on here. We have now given our nanny notice and found someone who seems really great. I think what I have learnt from this is to expect more. I could see potential problems at the interview and during trial working days where I was there with her and the kids (as well as during the settling in period). Her references were very good and I thought I probably wasn't going to get anyone better - well, it took me about a year but my gut feeling is, I have managed it. As people wrote on this thread - it makes you feel SO much better to stop a bad situation.

Thank you everyone!

Simic - in terms of how much "better" you could do, don't let your lowered expectations from old bad nanny restirct what you ask of your new nanny - our nanny will in a day manage several "outings" and that's with a 1 and 3 yr old, to the shops, park, library, taking them two stops on the local train and back again (god knows why but it's dd's idea of heaven!). Despite this she also cooks them both lunch, gives them their naps and is an absolutet pleasure to be with!

well done simic

Hi this is my first post,I am a nanny ,have been for more years than I care to mention which means that I have alot more experience than many of the parents I work for,BUT they are that childs parents and apart from offering advice when asked for the parents are always right. If want
your nannyin to work at 8am that is what she should do,nannies are generally excellent at time management able to juggle several things at once cetainly never late to pick up without avery good reason .Sack her,she has no respect for you and doesn`t even seem to like you.youmust like your nanny and respect her but this also swings the other way she treats you like c*ap.

You sacked her,good for you.