My non-sleeping mindee

[Saltire]

is wearing me down.
I didn't have them yesterday due to me being ill,a nd on Monday he actually slept for more than 10 mintues in the 10 hour day, so was overall a far happier child.
He and his brother are due here at 10am, and the mum has already texted me to say he's been up since 4.45 am (he's 10 months), and hasn't slept yet,a nd has been screaming with tiredness since 9am

I am breaking out in a sweat already.
He won't sleep unless beign pushed in parm, in the upright position.
He won't sleep in cot, as he screams till he's sick, ditto if I lie the buggy flat.
If he's not asleep within 1 1/2 hour of beign pushed around, we have to stop so he can have food (I don't think I have ever seen a 10 motnh old eat asmuch), he needs food every 1 1/1/2 - 2 hours). Then he'll poo, so we have to stop again and change the nappy, and back to square one again.
If he doesn't sleep, then he won't let me down, he literally screams till he's sick if I try to sit him on floor, or even put him in high chair so i can cook!

Really could do with some tactics to get him to sleep[

Just to let you all know that the mum took him to the docs and he said it's not reflux,he aid "he has a bad sleep routine"
Also, I watched him sleep yesterday, when he slept for approx 10 minutes, and he enver closes his eyes properly. I ahve noticed it before, but one eye is lamost open the otehr slightly so. He also flinches at the slightest noise, so he's not getting quality sleep.

nightmare, Salty

do you feel like you want to give notice or persevere?

[hug]

Saltire, my ds2 could make himself sick in as little as a minuite. I used to try rocking him to sleep for literally hours would put him in the cot just whilst I rushed for a wee and by the time I came back he would have been sick.

You really sound like you are trying everything you can. I think it sounds like the parents really need help with a sleep schedule. Do you think you could persuade them to talk to their HV. Mine was really helpful with my children's sleep issues.

good doc has checked him out, so now we know its not reflux and its a case of bad rotuine and needs to be retrained

i have always said you can retrain a bad sleeper in 2weeks if you persvere (sp)

yes you may have 10+ nights of screaming/no sleep but soon after that the child will reliese (even at 10mths) and learn to settle theirselves down

but as i said before, if the parents wont do it then there is NOTHING saltire can do

The mum might well be out of a job in about 4 weeks, so I ma persevering until then.
DH wants me to give notice. He says apart from the stress, he thinks the mum needs to "get a grip".
Yesterday she turned up with no buggy (I have to use their buggy as it's the only one he will "sleep" in)
I had to use my double buggy, so of course he wouldn't sleep - well he did for 10 mins while we were out.
No coats for either child
no wellies, older one ahd sandals on
She had a hangover, both kids looked like they hadn't been washed all weekend.
She sat for 15 minuts moaning about how expensive childcare is. - our contract is that if I have the boys they pay me full daily rate, if I don't then they pay half. Their dad is an agency worker, so last week he worked 3 days out of five, but I still had the boys every day. The result is hat she's payin me more, even though he's not working, and then she sits and moans about it

gawd she sounds a right misery guts, inform her next time that you dont HAVE to have her children every day if dh is at home on shifts

blondes - the parents won't do a routine. I can tell you that without even asking them. It's "anything for an easy life", and if that means putting their Dses into teh back room with a DVD so they can have "quality me time" then they do it.

I was at a BBQ at theirs at the weekend, adn they don't even put youngest mindee in a highchair oto give him his food, they let him crawl around and they folow him with the food

tbh i would say quit, but its your sanity against a wage

She just laughs if I say anything, for example "oh mindee 2 has jammed something in the disc drawer of PC" and she laughs and says "that's my boy"
I ma also trying to train the older one to "take turns", he grabs out at whatever toy his brother has, yesterday it was a pushalong musical thing, and the mum and dad were both there at picking up time. The youger child was playing with it, and the older one went to try and get it, the dad said "nox, your brother is playing with it, you wait till he's finished"> The mum then told older boy "your little brother has to learn to share, you get it from him if you want"

So totally contradicitng each other!

God as a parent whose children are at a cm's I would also say quit.

They sound WAY more trouble than they are worth.

Plus they will be a nightmare if you get other mindees, and if I came round to visit a childminder and saw those two children I would (wrongly I know) assume it was partly to do with the childminder, and it would put me off big time.

Sorry you have to put up with this, our lovely childminder got my boys into daytime routines when she had them, but they were 3.5 mths old at the time, and she has school pick-ups etc. to fit around so it was necessary for her.

You can't re-do all the parenting for them, especially if they are too lazy to bother themselves.

I am totally at their "bedtime routine" despite not being a routine person.

good luck

When he woke yesterday he rubbed his eyes and pulled at his hair for a good hour afterwards, so is obviously tired, I can't think what to do to stop the "noise" from waking him, it's the slightest thing, for example next doors car going past when we were out.

maybe stick a radio beside him so he has continual noise?

Radio is a good idea, DS2 likes to fall asleep to a story tape (always the same one), could you try and instill that as a routine, it could even be a cd of nursery rhymes seeing as he is so little.

blonds.its not luck for you is it ?its that you have got them into a trained routine..

totally agree.. all sleep problems, unless child is ill, are down to weak discipline or one parent being too soft..

only parents can cure this not cm...

tis tue, tho helped that i have a fab mb who beleives in routine and also asks my advice and follows it :)