Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Reference help - wwyd?

5 replies

tattycoram · 06/09/2010 16:00

Our childminder is giving up childminding and wants to work as a nanny or in a nursery. Two of her families are leaving anyway and I think she wants a change now her daughter is at school.

She has asked me for a reference. In lots of ways she has been great, but she hasn't been all that reliable - we have only had ds there two days a week for the past year and there has probably been one day every couple of months that she hasn't been able to do (the impact would have been greater had DS been there full time). Also and recently tacked on a days annual leave in a rather underhand way, which meant DH had to take unpaid leave.

So, I have thought about this a lot and there is no way I can not mention this to a family wanting to hire her as a nanny as it would put them in a difficult position. What should I do? Should I tell her?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
nannynick · 06/09/2010 16:12

A reference needs to be accurate. Giving a negative reference can cause problems though... so bit of a tricky one.

Maybe talking with her would be best... say you can write a reference but that if asked about reliability you will need to say about issues encountered.

You could then write about the positive things... and say how long you used her service. Then invite people to call.

What a reference is missing is very telling... so if you don't say she was very reliable... then someone reading that reference with luck will pick up on that.

tattycoram · 06/09/2010 18:18

I know, it is difficult, because I do like her and don't want to make her life more difficult, but I can't in good faith tell another family who will be relying on her that she is IS reliable when my experience is that she isn't (totally - I hope I'm not over reacting)

Will she expect a written reference to show people? Whenever I have asked someone to be a referee I have just given their contact details

OP posts:
tattycoram · 06/09/2010 18:19

Actually, now I remember, when we started with her, she gave us names of two people to contact

OP posts:
nannynick · 06/09/2010 18:40

Perhaps say that you will be happy to give a verbal reference... then if she goes to a nanny agency, the agency could call you.

tattycoram · 06/09/2010 19:36

Yes, thanks, that's good advice. Much appreciated Smile

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread