childminders come advice please

[MUM2BLESS]

I had to do a cold turkey on a child months ago. Asked not to let little one sleep. She fell asleep on way to a group and I had to wake her up.

I had to intervene and wrote down the events of the day and how the little was during that time. I really felt that I should recommentd that she sleep for one hour. The parents agreed with that.

Today I had to wake her up just after an hour. She was crying. I hate waking her up so early. I write down her sleep time in her diary.

This restriction of sleep is because she wakes up all hours during her time at home.

I have tried but she can only sleep for an hour. Any suggestions.....

She is almost 31 months old.

I look after another little one a little older who is allowed to sleep much longer.

Ooh tricky one
will mull it over

When you're restricting her sleep to just 1 hour have the parents commented that it's actually working and she's sleeping through? Personally I would not wake a child up if it means they're screaming for ages afterwards or are dozy all afternoon, I wouldn't do that to my own child so I wouldn't do it to someone elses either.

I think I would just bend the truth a little, let her sleep and see if the parents remark on there being a difference. Maybe when you first started this waking thing the baby had an issue, illness or teeth or something, that might not be the case now. Or could you maybe put her to bed earlier so she can sleep for longer but get up at the same time as if you were waking her early?

What does the mum say the child does when SHE wakes her up in the day?

the child has a right to sleep

the balancing act between observing parents wishes and the child's needs can be very very tricky

I am afraid that I would let the child sleep and if the parents don't like it then let them go to a CM who doesn't mind

Also IME better/more/longer naps in daytime breeds better sleep at night, this is anecdotal only, not scientific evi

Hmm not sure, but if think Ofsted would possibly take a dim veiw on this, they might call it sleep deprivation, give them a call, anonymously, find out wher you stand.
Then let the parent know what was said, if they still dont want the child to sleep get it in writing from them, then ask them to write to Ofsted (with their reason) its then all doumented,
Just my thoughts..

documented even..

MUM2BLESS, you say the child is 31 months - I have generally found that by that age, they often don't sleep at all. Today neither the 34 month old nor the 20 month old slept at all! I would certainly not think that a limit of one hour is sleep deprivation at that age - sorry..........

However, it is a difficult balance between respecting the parents wishes and meeting the needs of the child. If the child is a restless sleeper anyway, if you were to allow the child to sleep a bit longer than an hour, I really do not think the parents will be able to detect it.

Thanks

I will not lie to the parents.

The little one is a heavy sleeper. I tried very recently to see if she could be allowed to sleep longer but dad did not want this.

She sometimes ends up in bed with the parents. There sleep is often broken because of this. Both parents are fairly busy.

I am glad that she is allowed an hour sleep. Having four kids myself i know that every child is so different. If she was mine I would let her sleep for about an hour and a half then find activies to make her tired again.

Has anyone had to do this with a minded child (reduce or stop their sleep due to what the parents wanted?)

On the other hand if I did this to the other mindee I look after she would perhaps get VERY upset. Every parent is different.

There is a difference in her sleeping pattern at home now its more stable. The parents are also reducing her sleep whilst she is at home (lunch time sleep) as far as I know.

But all children are diffrent, as we know,
My own 2 boys for example the eldest still had a nap after lunch right up until he started reception at 5yrs old, Ds2 dropped his nap shortley after he started nursery at 4yrs old.
The child I was minding just before the summer holidays was allowed 20 mins after lunch.

Thanks for your help everyone!

It sounds to me as though they may have sleep issues with the child at home and this is having a knock-on effect with her needing to catch up on her sleep in the daytime. If that's the case, they need to sort out the sleep problem, not try and shove the problem onto you (why should you have to deal with an over-tired, fractious child?).

You really can't prevent a child who needs to sleep from sleeping. The EYFS is quite clear about putting the child's interests first.

I've had this issue with parents myself and, when I asked, I found that both children woke during the night even when they hadn't been with me during the day and had been forced to stay awake at home. With the younger child, they even asked me to "stuff him up" with food because they insisted he must be hungry, although he ate as much as the other children and often more. Nor was he allowed a drink after he left my house to ensure his bladder was empty.

I agree with Kindleofkittens.

Hi Thanks for that