Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.
Childcare
Dealing with behaviour of mindees
kelli22 · 01/09/2005 15:55
Hi everyone,
I've been watching super nanny and i know that cm's aren't allowed to use the methods for behviour that sn does, so i was wondering what do you do?
take for eg the behaviour of the child on last nights prog if you managed to catch it, if you didnt see it, the little boy was 5yrs old and he swore and hit and kicked his mum!
whats the worst behaviour you have encountered during your time as a cm and how did you deal with that, im just interested as i plan to become a cm in march and im worried about how to handle behaviour of children that aren't mine........
Thanks in advance
JELLYJELLY · 01/09/2005 16:10
I find time out after a warning to be very effective. I find that the children tend to wiggle out and they gte put back on but once they understand that if they get off they get put back and i dont break, they stay on. (without toys or telly)
i feel really mean doing it but i know that it is for the best for the children and the parents know what i am doing as well so they can carry on at home and they do.
I do this with my 2.5 year old and i only have to say please stop doing that or would you like to go to the time out chair (or whatever they are doing)they stop whatever they are doing and start being nice.
ThePrisoner · 01/09/2005 19:06
Years ago - been smacked, punched, bitten and kicked, had hair pulled, belted with shoes/toys, lunch/drinks thrown across room, reduced to tears ... you've seen Supernanny (I had the T-shirt!) Had only been minding a year or so, and had never encountered behaviour like this with my own.
Didn't deal with it then in the way I would deal with it now - I did get angry sometimes, but never lost my temper. I didn't know as much about "time out" as I do now, thanks to all these TV programmes! Would also recommend doing any Positive Behaviour courses available.
I think I'm probably much more laid back and patient these days (perhaps that comes with experience?), so don't think I raise my voice (will have to ask mindees!!) I now have a settee which is used as the "time out" place if necessary, but it is rarely used. I am much more able to diffuse situations through talking and distracting.
It's important that parents know how you manage unacceptable behaviour!
kelli22 · 02/09/2005 10:45
thanks for your msgs its helpful to know how you deal with it, i didnt think cm's could use the time out method so its good to know that you can if you need to, i def think i will find out about positive behaviour courses.
if anyone else has any other tips or can tell me their stories id be happy to read them.
thanks again
JELLYJELLY · 02/09/2005 12:34
you are not allowed to use the naughty step/seat/chair etc but am ok to use the time out.
When the ofsted lady came around she asked how i would discipline and i said timeout she said that fine, i said that some people use naughty step which i dont like and she waved her fingers and said no.
HellyBelly · 02/09/2005 12:56
Hi Jelly - you know i use the sofa now but i just wanted to ask something. Is it the words 'naughty....' that they don't like but they don't mind it being called time out?
I.e. '.....you'll get time out on the sofa.....' is ok but not '.....you'll go on the naughty sofa......'???
Just wanted to double check this for future reference!
kelli22 · 02/09/2005 17:10
so i can have a time out chair?
i think the whole naughty thing is because its phycologically (sp?) damaging, i.e when that woman on super nanny called her daughter a stupid idiot i was horrified, how damaging to grow up being called that by your own mother, that is just an extreme example of why you dont use words like naughty and stupid. i think you can say some words if in the right context i.e. "that behaviour was very naughty" but not "you are being very naughty".......
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.