No contact after Job ends!

[nasdaq666]

finding it difficult as i am in touch with children i use to look after over the internet but if mention anything about meeting up again it seems like i land myself in fire as that is when the communication kinda goes awkward.
I have left my last job now for about a year and am in a new job but i can never meet up with my old charges. I saw them the other day in the street and it was them who approached me and in a way i was glad because its been so long since i have seen them but i also wish they didnt apparoach me as i am missing them so much! I have asked the parents if i could visit but i hear nothing! and when i left they told me they will still see me around and will still need babysitting but i have never been asked! and they told me this last year July! im finding it hard as i talk to these people over a social networking site and its so hard because i can never see them. anyone else experienced this?

One option would be to stop contact via social networking. Possibly not what you want to do though but if it's causing issues, cease all contact.

Moving on to a new family will often result in you not keeping in touch with the previous family. Sometimes you do keep in touch a bit but you may not see them often.

As you are in contact with the children via social networking, are the parents aware of that... as from the sounds of things the parents don't want you meeting with the children.

Did you leave them, or did they (the parents) decide that they no longer needed you?

Hi Nanny nick

No they didnt need me after i stayed there for a year and half. my contract came to the end. yes the parents are aware im in touch with them online and infact at christmas last year they sent me a xmas card.
I just dont see why a parent would not want their children to still be in contact with their old nanny?

still better then no contact at all, which is what i get from some people

think you sound a lovely person but, if you dont mind me saying so, you need to develop a sterner approach.. I mean I am fond of all my mindees but if I won the lottery tomorrow it would be 4 weeks notice and good times roll...If you are this involved I think its a bit over the top..

I wouldnt feel it professional to socially network with my parents.. they are not friends...... thats work... I have my own friends.

I have been asked to go out socially with mums but always refuse, I do go to the mindees parties though..

I think that you need to concentrate on your personal life and divorce this from your professional life.. should be two different things imo..

just re read your thread and its the children you are in contact with not the parents.. sorry but thats over the top.. how old are they? how old are you?

please dont think I am making assumptions but it could be viewed as a bit needy and strange on your part...

The body, I have been a nanny for 24 years, I am in contact with all of my previous charges, all 22 of them! I was a big part of their lifes for their formative years, I love all the kids that I looked after and love seeing/speaking to them often!

I could never just walk away from these children. I am quite shocked that you think it is odd to want to see children you have spent lots of time bonding with!

Nasdaq666 - I think that you need to contact the parents, face to face or by telephone, not text message or e-mail or through the children. Just tell the parents that you miss them and would it be ok to pop in to see them for an hour or so when it is convenient to them. Some of my previous employers have such busy lives that out of sight means out of mind and it's not that they are being cruel, they just have more pressing things to think about and remember than the old nanny! I do find that it is me who does most of the keeping in touch! Apart from my last family who ask me to babysit lots.

Some of my ex-charges are late teens now and I keep in touch with them via social networking sites (scary sometimes!) and so arrange to meet them personally, rather than going through their parents but my 13 year old ex-charges, I always call ex-MB to see when they are free! Although they live quite away from me now so it is usually birthday/christmas that I see them, so I call to ask to take them out for a birthday treat around their birthday, I left them when they were 3.6!

Meant to say that I am in contact with 13 year old ex-charges on facebook and via text messages.

And that I don't mind doing all the keeping in touch, it means I get to see them! I also find that the parents don't want to trouble an ex-nanny incase she is not interested in keeping in touch. Some don't. Make it clear that you are interested in keeping in touch. It is tough, I have been through times when I thought it would be easier just to walk away but at the end of the day, these are little children who do care about you and wonder where you have gone. I am back temping for a family I left 4 years ago and it has been wonderful, the boys were so pleased to see me and, as they live a short flight from me, it was difficult to keep in touch at first, mum works long hours, wanted boys (who were 4) to bond with new nanny without me upsetting them, so I didn't talk to the boys for 6 months which was tough but I did talk to their mum and the new nanny and then came over to spend a week with them and then spoke with them once a month or so.

You have to be the one who makes sure they do not forget you, tough as that is when you have a new job!

callaird.. if the parents arnt keen on her keeping in touch with the children then she should back off imo.

I obviously dont know anything about your personal lives, but for me the only children I truly love and keep in contact with are my own!!..

I suppose nannys have pehaps a closer bond than cms as you are more part of the family, I do see that, but for me although I am very fond of all of my mindees its a job..not a vocation..

I just thought the poster was getting the situation out of proportion.

I am 34 and my friend and his sister still go to visit their old nanny from time to time.

But unfortunately you can't create this situation, you need to go with the parent's wishes or the young adult's wishes.

Thebody - I agree, if the parents aren't keen on the nanny keeping in touch then there is nothing anyone can do about it, luckily I have never had this problem. But, as I said, sometimes the parents lives are too hectic to find the time to contact the old nanny so the nanny has to be the one to let them know they want to keep in touch, if the family then say no, then you have to walk away.

All of my jobs have been long term (longer than 3 years, apart from my first) and so I have very close bonds with the children, I can't just walk away!

I don't have my own children but I am sure if I had, the affection I have for them would be different but I don't think it would change my feelings for my ex-charges. I love the fact that my 2nd charges (23 and 24) take me to the pub/clubbing with them. I am godmother to my first charges son. I am a huge part of their lives and long may it continue!

The body.. I am 35 years old and the children now are 16 and 14.
I have not said that the parents are not keen on me talking to their children as this doesnt seem to be the problem but the problem is if i ask to meet them or talk about meeting up then i hear nothing or my communication with the kids stop for abit. so i have stopped asking them now.
I think the problem may be that i saw them briefly when i saw them in the street which may of triggered me feeling like this. I am not needy or strange as i know a few other nannies who see their old charges alot more then what i am asking for!