Epidural or not?

[CageBird]

I have had 2 difficult, natural births. The 1st was drug free (no one gave me a medal) at home, the 2nd I had gas and air at home, and then a spinal block after a traumatic ambulance transfer after DS got stuck after 3 hours of pushing.

I made a promise to myself that if I ever did this again I would go straight to hospital for an epidural.

Well, here I am again, 9 weeks to go, and am wavering. I'd like a somewhat active birth and don't fancy being stuck in hospital for ages afterwards. I'm not too keen on a cannula either. But I'm also not wild about labour pains!!

How do I decide!? Are epidural's worth it?

Cagebird - you know your pain thresholds and tolerance levels. FWIW, if you have an epidural early on, it really restricts your ability to have an active birth, esp the more top ups you have (and if you have an epidural too early may slow the labour and may result in quite a few top ups, meaning you end up having to give birth on your back in bed - I did with DS1 after 2 top ups), and you do need to stay in for longer post birth so they can monitor you.

Was induced with DS1 - had epidural at 4 cm - complications in birth, couldnt feel to push, ended up having to stay in for 3 days afterwards.

Natural waterbirth with DS2 - incredibly fast labour, could feel to push so very quick and straightforward birth, out within 6 hours.

Each birth very different - and it may be that your third labour will be very quick and straightforward so you dont need an epidural. Or it may be that you decide you need it. Either way, I'd keep my mind open if I were you and go for an epidural in a hospital context only if you felt you really needed it.

If you want an active birth, have you thought about using water for pain relief if possible? Getting in the water at 10cms was enough to take my mind off the contractions for a bit and get me through transition.

Good luck.

I had an epidural after being induced early - my little girl was back to back with me so I'd been told it would be extremely painful. I had an epidural early on and it worked beautifully - couldn't feel a thing (started snoring according to DH). Though my little girl started getting oxygen deprived and I needed an emergency c-section in the end I still loved the epidural.

I had an epidural with 1st. I could feel the contractions and so I could push effectively.

Was taken up to ward after and virtually left all night. Remember testing legs myself by sitting on side of bed and having a go at standing

Had nothing with second as no time and remember vowing to never ever do it again without an epidural.

Doing it again in 12 weeks and doing everything in my power to ensure epidural.

noone says you have to stay in, I had baby 3am and left that afternoon

though it was not an active birth

why not play it by ear? they are there if you want one, dont have a drama/stress now see on the day!

good luck

Chill. See how you feel. There is no right or wrong. No need to decide now. Assuming you're not going for a home birth, there is no rush to decide. If its your third child likelihood it'll be quicker this time anyway.

(But personally, I've had 3 kids, epidural with all. LOVED THEM! Don't understand all this avoidance of drugs malarky myself )

Oh, and meant to add....post epidurals you can go straight out if you want.....in my area they keep you in for 6 hours then you can go home, assuming no other complications.

An epidural is not normally considered a complication.

HAving had both a natural, drug free birth and an induced, drug laden one, I much preferred the natural. Bothj were posterior babies, both were almost 2 weeks overdue. I should say, with my first the epidural meant I was lyign down and pushing for 2 hours. I got extremely close to forceps but managed to get her out just in time. With my second, I stood up and the pain was more manageable. However, that labour was only 3 hours long, compared to 13 hours for the first, had it gone on much longer I don't doubt I'd have asked for an epidural, if for nothing else than to get some rest. The epidural meant I stayed in hospital for 3 days, and I really couldn't walk or control my bladder for a day afterwards. With the natural birth, I walked myself to the postnatal ward and left 6 hours later.
Ultimately, it's a decision you really can't make til the time comes. I know I did what felt best at both births, and I couldn't have done anything else, so why feel guilty or smug? The sad thing is, I felt so elated after my second but the general feelign is that people don't want to hear about those experiences for fear of making other women feel bad Truth is, things can change in a heartbeat, had I not had a fab midwife encouraging me into good positions, it could easily have ended very differently.

I'm with Indaba. I'm in the "thank gawd for epidurals" camp.

I briefly wished that I had the tolerance to go natural and active but I know me, and I do not.

at "no one gave me a medal"

I was induced (DS was 2 weeks late). 12 hours into labour and only 4 inches dialated MW asked if I wanted an epidural. I said not yet. She asked if I thought I might like one later then, to which I said, probably. Her response - then what's the point in being in pain now?

Good point!

I had the epidural and whilst it took the pain away, I still felt all the contractions. It also relaxed me so much that within 20 mins I was fully dilated. I stood or sat on the birthing ball until the very end and delivered naturally. (ie no forceps etc pushed him out myself.) I didn't have to stay in hospital any longer, and had no side effects. Personally I think anyone who gives birth without drugs is either very very brave, or an insane masochist!

Thanks for your experiences, I know I should chill and see how it goes in hospital, I just feel that unless I go in all guns blazing for an epidural, they'll fob me off until it's too late because I've managed without before.

But I think I'll take the good advice and start without and see how I go.

It;s a different mindset, though. Steeling yourself for a drug free labour takes some doing...

Cagebird, get Ina May's Guide to Childbirth. Most empowering book about birth ever, and I swear it's what got me through my second birth naturally. There's a lot to be said for self belief.

Personally I think if you managed the first birth drug free, then you should feel pretty confident that things will be ok this time.

I know there are no guarantees, but tbh, first births are the most painful, so this one is likely to be easier. It sounds as though you were just very unlucky second time round, but there's no reason why that should happen again.

An epidural is statistically more likely to lead to other interventions, which is a reason for trying to avoid it. Look at it this way: you did brilliantly with dc1, and managed a natural birth, and were preparing for a natural birth with dc2, but unfortunately he got stuck. If you go into an epidural earlier on with dc3, you'll never know whether you could have managed without, and you might always feel that things could have gone fine. If things go wrong, as with dc2, then you may end up with an epidural anyway, so nothing lost in a way.

My 4th baby got stuck and it was only because I hadn't had an epidural that I was able to get him out by changing position rather than ending up with forceps and probably a c section.
And that was after 3 perfectly straight forward deliveries.