2nd timers - how long after the birth did you have to stay?

[June2008]

I am pregnant with no 2 and starting to think about what to do after the birth.

With the birth of dd1 (nearly 2yrs ago) I had a drip and epidural as I had been in labour for over 48hrs, in the consutlant led unit at the local hospital. However the birth itself was quite straight forward and dd was born with no further intervention at about 6am. At 10am I was allowed to leave with dd and my dh took us to a nearby midwife led unit where we stayed for 3 nights.

I am obviously thinking about doing this again assuming all goes to plan, and I am fairly likely to have an epidural again - so am I likely to be let out again as quickly? If I don't have an epidural will they let me out quicker?

And does anyone have experience of staying in a midwife led unit postnatally with a 2yr old coming to visit - or is the best thing just to get home as soon as possible?

I just wanted to add that last time we were at the midwife led unit the care we received was fantastic - own room (thats all they have), two midwives there all the time along with a HCA and actually for two out of the three night I was one of only two ladies there. Unlike the night I have on the antenatal ward at the hospital but thats another story!

Thank you for any wise words!

I was in for 36 hours after DD2 - mind you that w3as a considerable improvement on DD1, where I was in for 5 days . I was only kept so long because I had an epidural, and my blood pressure goes pretty low with that, so they kept me in till I could stand up without feeling dizzy.

If you are staying in and your 2yo is coming to visit, it can be helpful to have someone else there who can take your toddler away. IME, toddlers get bored pretty swiftly in the hospital, so my mum came and brought DD1, then she took DD1 away after a while and DH stayed on quite a bit longer.

Hope it all goes well, and you can get out in a few hours!

I was in for 2 night after having dd. I wanted to be an early discharge but since I had to have an anti-d jab the next day, I couldn*t face the journey to the hospital to get it. I then stayed one more night because the discharge team was called to an emergency just before they wanted to see me the next day .
ds was not able to visit me in hospital, as small children were not allowed on the ward due to infection risk.

My first labour was 40+ hours with an induction, epidural etc. I would've been out after 3 days but stayed longer because ds1 ended up going into SCBU on the 3rd day.

Second time around I was induced and had an epidural. I was allowed home the following day.

Third time around I was induced but didn't have an epidural (though not through choice). I was allowed home the following day.

Watching with interest, I have a 2 year old nd due with second baby in 2 days.

3 days as baby ill.

out the same day with DC2

I have been told by a friend that you only "have" to stay 6 hours after the birth, if no complications.

Pamlet - I think that is right. I had a 6 hour discharge after my first - second was born at home.

DS2 was born at 5.50am and we were home by lunchtime, Straight forward labour/delivery G&A,pethadine.

So was allowed six hour discharge and even managed to squeeze in visit from DS1 at 7am, while still in the delivery room!

Exp DC3 in 4 days, hoping for home waterbirth this time!

Good luck

x

DS2 born 4am, we were discharged by 1pm and would have been sooner if we hadn't had to wait for ages for the hearing test.

You don't "have" to do anything. You can saunter out of there within 30 minutes should the fancy take you, nobody will be barring the doors

At the unit I work in, women are regularly discharged within 2-4 hours. With an epidural however, you may well be catheterised, which would stay in for 9 hours and then you would be expected to do a big wee to show your bladder is working properly.

With DC2 I left after around 9 hours. There wasn't going to be time to get the baby's blood group result within that time frame (esp as he was born at 00:06 on a bank holiday) so just had the anti-D (I am Rh-) without waiting to find out. We could have left earlier but they suggested we waiting until the morning; I said ok on the condition we stay in the delivery room, DH is not leaving so if you send me to the ward I am going home instead....

With DC3 similar, again stayed in the delivery room - left after around 14 hours, could have left earlier if we wanted too, again would have gone home rather than go to the post natal ward. I was told with straightforward birth can leave after 2 -6 hours.

About 2 hours here which I think was too little time really - it wasn't something I was pressing for, I just wasn't really given the option and felt as if I was taking up a delivery room that someone else in labour might need (very busy hospital ward). Lots of people I know have DC2 in the morning and are cooking dinner/collecting kids from school etc in the afternoon.

Ideally I think I'd want to do the following before leaving hospital:

1. Give baby second feed to be sure all going ok
2. Have a proper shower etc (only one available was a drippy one in the only loo open on the labour ward so had to hurry - plus the window was propped permanently open and it was December!)
3. Have a bit of a rest and time to stop shaking/absorb what has happened etc
4. Have something proper to eat (ie not just the one round of toast that DH insisted on sharing!)
5. Gaze at baby
6. Get newborn checks done (ended up spending the next week driving to and from hospital in the snow to get different bits of checks sorted)

So say 6 hours if all ok?

It's a bit overwhelming to come home and worry about the baby feeding, how the toddler is feeling, getting dinner, sorting yourself out etc and a little space before that would be nice. I know people have homebirths all the time but there is something about being discharged from hospital which makes everyone think you are fine and all is normal. Remember that when our mums had children they were all in for a week or so, so see us in that light without realising we're still in the aftermath. In my case all the grandparents came round within an hour of us getting back and I found it all so overwhelming I had to disappear upstairs - I sat there feeling too shakey to get in the shower but too 'post-birth' to want to sit and make small talk to FIL etc whilst they all drank tea and took photos of DS. Eventually DH popped up to see how I was and I burst into tears and pointed out that neither DS nor I had been fed since just after the birth. DS was then too sleepy to feed and I had to have phone advise from mw to sort him out. Eventually the family left without even having made us a cup of tea let alone offered to get a takeaway/shopping etc. Usually they are all reasonably thoughtful but they got carried away with the excitement I think. I was quite upset at the time but I think they realised when they got home and produced cakes etc the next week!

Sorry that's a bit long, your question has brought it all back (DS 5 months)!

sorry adviCe

home as soon as poss imo. Had horrendous experience of post natal ward first time around so was gagging to leave second time, was quick and easy birth, baby fed fine, no concerns, had had a shower. He was born at 4am ish and we were home about 8.30. This was fine for me. The midwives came that afternoon, all was well, took him to the hospital for 48hr check the next afternoon, live close, no bother - they picked up his tongue tie and that was that. I personally would much rather be at home asap.

No epidural.
Ds two nights would have been allowed out in 24 hours but difficulties bf.

DD out 16 hours after birth would of been 12 but she hadn't had a pee so we had to wait for that.

BTW dd is 9 months I wanted to be out in 6 hours but my hospital said that the earliest they will discharge a baby is 12 hours. So either they recently changed it or it depends on the hospital.

Thank you for all your replies so far!

Poledra - good tip about having someone to take dd1 away once she gets bored - I want her to be involved but I think she will appreciate going off with my mum and dad more!

Sonilaa - hadn't considered that dd1 might not be allowed to visit - do you know if the same applies to both hospitals and midwife led units?

And thank you to the others who have mentioned about leaving after about 6 hours. I know thats the case with a 'straight forward' birth but was wondering what that can actually include.

As I said above last time I was allowed to go to the midwife led unit after just four hours but what I didn't say that was a good 25miles away! Dh took us both in the car. I did have an epidural and was catheterised but there was no mention of having to stay until I did a wee!

I think I am getting the impression that I was fairly luck to be let out after such a short time with dd1 but if I don't go off to the midwife led unit again then they might make me stay longer in hospital if I have an epidual and catheta again.

Thank you for all you words of wisdom! Keep them coming!

agree with Daisy you can leave as soon as you wish

I expect all hospitals allow your children to visit - they just don't allow unrelated kids

DD2 born at 4:15pm. Left hospital at 7pm
Basically the time taken for first feed, placenta to deliver, stitches & shower
No epidural though.

(Had to go back next day for paed & hearing check)

Actually, no, not all hospitals allow children to visit. My unit is currently closed to all children except in exceptional circumstances.

My hospital won't allow children under 1 I would ask your mw about visitors and how long you will stay with a birth like your first.

I had never even considered that my DD (2.4) might not be able to visit. I will discharge myself if that is the case

you won't necessarily need an epidural again.

i had a bad birth with ds1 including an epidural

with ds2 i had a straightforwrd delivery and had a '6 hour' discharge. as that would have been about 4am i actually left about 2.5 hours after delivery and it was fantastic to get to my own bed, toilet, shower etc. convinced me to try for home birth this time; dc3 due any day.

I had epidural and knackeringly long labour with dc1, and stayed in overnight.

With dc2 I had no pr other than g&a, and the hospital were happy to discharge me 6h after dc2 was born. However, I had had PND after dc1 and because of this I wanted to stay in longer. They were happy to do this, too. I was put under no pressure to leave and stayed 3 nights. After the first night a single room came free, and they were happy to move me into it. It was the best thing I could have done. I had 3 calm days getting to know dd, unpressured by anything domestic. Ds had 3 lovely one-to-one days with his daddy, and they came to visit me every day. With food supplies, too, of course! Ds was 2y3m.

I'm sure that staying in helped prevent the PND recurring.

Good luck with no2

Think it's entirely up to you and how you've got on. With my second and third I was home within 4 hours, but this was at my request. I was always very keen to get home to see the big brother (and sister 3rd time round) and because I reckon I get a whole lot more rest at home.