Home birthed children grow up to be especially sunny, relaxed and happy children

[Bumperlicious]

Do you think?

I'm really not convinced about the hb resulting in happy, sunny children.

But I'd be interested to see studies investigating how traumatic births can affect children's personalities. Is that possible? Probably not.

I had one very difficult birth and my ds is a very tricky character. My other two were straightforward and seem to be quite balanced people. But heigh ho, anecdotal twaddle.......

No my DS was born at home and he is a stroppy little bastard!

I doubt it makes any odds to their life at all - why would it? Although my homebirth was not a beautiful serene experience in a pool with whale music in the background and the sunlight streaming through the window. It was 4 in the morning, DD was still at home as even though my waters had broken at 11 we thought things wouldn't get going for ages so sent my parents home. DS popped out before the midwife could get to us and DH had to slap him around the face to get him breathing. We then realised the phone was in the bathroom and as DS had been born while I was bent over the sofa the umbilical cord was through my legs and DH was holding him behind my back. We didn't know how to get him through to me (sounds stupid but I think we were in shock!) so we did this weird comedy walk with the baby between my legs to get to the phone!

No wonder he is a bit disturbed

Ha ha ha ,thanks for sharing that Nicky

From what I've heard my gran was so traumatised by her homebirth that she could never contemplate having another baby- but my dad is a remarkably sunny character. So either he was going to be sunny anyway, or it isn't the lack of stress that does it.

weren't most children born at home in the 40s and 50s?
my parents and all their siblings were - like anyone else they all have totally different personalities!

i have had HBs with both my dc but did glance at that book before my second one and thought it really was very wishy-washy bollocks..

and anyway, my ds has been a strop-monster from the start so i couldn't agree less with the statement

Everyone used to be born at home-my mother and all her siblings certainly were and you had exactly the same mix of personalities that you have now. I don't think that all the elderly in this country are happy, friendly, sunny personalities-and yet the majority were born at home. It is nonsense!
The state of mind of the mother has more to do with it. If you want a home birth and it goes well then you will be relaxed. A home birth would have caused me stress-I wouldn't have wanted it. I see nothing wrong in this-except the assumption that a home birth is better for all and better for the baby. Where you are born doesn't matter to the baby! The state of mind of the mother does.

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no, my HB nephew is miserable as fuck

DS was a traumatic birth with every drug known to man and he is a happy little chap

Nicky that actually made me chuckle out loud!!!

nikki I know I shouldnt have but I just laughed out loud at your post

Made my bump jump!

DD was an emergency hospital theatre forceps birth - was labouring in hosptial and it didn't take 20 mins to get to theatre once they realised her heartrate had crashed. It was very quick from realising her distress to her being born, don't know the exact minutes but they ran down the corridor with me. Was prepped for emcs if forceps hadn't worked first time.

I considered a HB too but decided that I wanted to go in once labour was strong in case something went wrong. It was my gut feeling. As it was DD's distress was due to her position (OT and head side on) which would have happened at home too.

I was born by emergency section with the cord round my neck and oxygen deprived. DD was born oxygen deprived due to the long time stuck in her bad position. I think knowing I wouldn't have lived if my mum had been at home birthing me helped me choose a hospital birth - and I am ever thankful I did.

DD is a very friendly cheerful character who slept for large chunks through the night from 6 weeks on.

Excellent post by Loopy.

Let me share a story, my friend was a doula recently for a home birth. She's a very experienced hospital doula (in the US) but this was her first home birth and by the sounds of it, tricky. The baby came in an awkward presentation (I think perhaps, shoulder dystocia) and the midwife handled it excellently, guiding the baby down. Then the woman started to haemmorrhage and the midwife dealed with that calmly and efficiently too. My friend who has worked for the hospital for many years said she'd never seen anything like it. At both points in the hospital, all hell would have broken loose and likely a caesarean would have happened.

She said witnessing the home birth and the midwife's work was life changing and may seriously change how she works.

Now the contrast between hospital and home isn't quite so massive in the UK, but I think it's worth bearing in mind that hospitals can both cause problems and make bad situations worse. Midwives who are giving you one-on-one care are likely to spot and resolve problems earlier and they carry resuss equipment for you and the baby, as well as drugs for haemmorhages etc.

Loopy is so right that there are risks in both locations. No birth is 100% safe. But for me, I would (and did) opt for home birth. Not for any hippy ideals but because I judged it to be the safest place for me.

Remember there have been very prestigious studies that consistently find home birth to have the same mortality rates as hospital birth and considerably lower morbidity rates.

Complete twaddle to suggest that the birthing experience dictates the child's personality. But I do think it's possible that the mother's experience affects her perception of her child.

I had a lovely hypnobirth at home with DS2 and as a result I do feel a closeness to him that I don't have with DS1 who was a nightmare hospital birth, even though I love them both unconditionally. It's hard to explain but I just see DS2 as being a chilled relaxed baby because I was chilled and relaxed. No doubt, in the coming years he will prove me totally wrong!

The decision where to give birth is unique to you. Personally I felt confident at home as I was low-risk and research shows that the risk of intervention or complications is reduced at home. I also believed that the midwives would transfer me to hospital well before any situation became an emergency.

Oldest and youngest born in hospital. Pains in arses (though very lovable of course).

Middle child born at home. He's not the messiah, but he's very close to it. Delightful child. Gorgeous. Sunny. Calm. Kind.

I have idly wondered if the amount of syntocinon my other two were exposed to made some sort of difference to their temperaments.

But who knows.....

Sorry, also meant to add that I had major, major wobbles before my homebirth. Mainly becase I wasn't low risk (I had GD) and had had a difficult first birth. My brilliant midwife was so supportive and very good at listening - got me through the wobbles. Could you talk to a midwife, get her to reassure you, or at least give you a well informed sounding board so you can talk through your worries?

are you me Octopus???

I had both boys at home, DS1 is firey, strong and independent DS2 was born with the sun shining in his personality and very rarely gets phased by anything, laid back and goes with the flow.

my reasons for HB were identical to Octopus