Please recommend a good book to read about labour/birth

[Summerhols]

Hi

I am due in June and am looking for a book that gives good information about what happens but also suggestions/advice/directions on breathing, positions, etc.

I have the Marie Mongan Hypnobirthing book and I have to say I am not liking it (I know it is to go along a course).

All I want is a book saying:
this is what the body does in labour and birth.....
These are the things that you can do (and your DP can do) to help.....

But something that is not going to make me feel guilty if I end up pleading and begging for all the drugs going. Though I would like to achieve a 'natural' birth I accept this might not happen so don't want to set myself up for feeling like a failure.

Hope that makes sense?

Any suggestions????

A midwifery textbook. Any "lay" books will just patronise you rigid.

I like 'what to expect when you are expecting'. If you have a strong stomach then 'birth: a history' (I think by tina cassidy but not sure on that) but my mum has the book at the moment so can't check. But the latter is not really a guide for people giving birth now, but has helped me put things in perspective! NB I don't recommend reading the latter if you are sqeamish or don't like hearing about awful things they used to do to people in labour.

If you want to see what the NHS should be doing for you in labour, and thus indirectly what is likely to happen the Nice Intrapartum Care Guidelines may be worth reading.

Ina May Gaskin

Either spiritual midwifery or guide to childbirth.

ina may gaskin's 'guide to childbirth' and watch 'the business of being born'

Noooo! Anything BUT WTE; it's waaay too American, patronising, very alarmist and non-evidence based (really not appropriate for outside US, you will spend the whole time wondering why they aren't doing x, y and z)

Thinking about it there's a reasonable sort of book called "Stand and Deliver" which I would prob recommend. I would second Ina May Gaskin as well, but if you're not keen on Mongan then you may well not like IMG as well. Good luck finding one that suits you!

I second all of Ina May Gaskin- her guide to childbirth is fabulous, and really empowered me for the birth of my second after an awful birth with my first. Avoid Miriam Stoppard like the plague, she is a patronising tit

My SIL lent me 'Birth and Beyond' by Dr Yehudi Gordon. It's really comprehensive and is great for pregnancy, childbirth and baby care stuff. It's quite new-agey, which I liked personally, but also full of solid info so you can ignore those bits if you like. Has some amazing photos of women giving birth, too.

it's outside your remit but i would very strongly recommend misconceptions for the downsides of both the medical and the natural model and also for a fantastic dissection of how grossly unbalanced the caregiving roles are in the wake of having a baby...it is fabulous. and you should get your dp to read the relevant chapters too!

I read "Birthing from within" recommended by a friend and found it really helpful and encouraging - its not condemning you at all if you end up with an all singing all dancing medicalised birth but pointing you in a good direction of you are hoping for a natural birth. the friend who recommended it was american and it is a bit "american" in style but really worth a read, you can get it on amazon.
I also loved all the Ina May Gskin books - really good to read i think in the weeks just before you are due as they are full of such positive stories, even about difficult births and i personally found it really really encouraging to have those stories in the back of my mind as i was preparing for birth and in labour too.
All the best to you

Thanks ladies, I think I'll try 'Guide to Childbirth' as this seems to be the main suggestion.

"Effective Birth Preparation" by Maggie Howell is good for ideas of things you and your dp can do to help in labour. It is another hypnobirthing one though, if you didn't like Mongan, you might not like this either. I thought it was beneficial to have Mongan's expanation of how the uterus muscle layers worked.

I love the Ina May guide to childbirth, but I wouldn't say it's necessarily the best bet if you want something impartial as she's quite anti epidurals etc. Perhaps get that one but something else as well. I have the Ina May book but also got this one from the library.

Stand and Deliver by Emma Mahony gives individual stories about different births from an elective caesarian to a hypno birth and how to get the best from each scenario and what they would do again/do differently.
I really liked it.
The best friends guides are funny but they are focused on the American, medicalised birth model.

I really like juju sundin's book. I think it's called active labour. I couldn't stand the hypnobirthing books or ina may to be honest. I have ended up using hypnobirthing CDs but the book going on about African women not feeling painin childbirth and ina may's orgasms during labour just wound me up... And gave my dh unhelpful ideas!

Juju sundin is much more realistic and gives practical preparation for labour. Having not been through labour I can't vouch for the success of her techniques but the book 'rang true' to me. By the end of the week, one way or another, I'll be able to say whether the book helped on the day or not... Nearly 42 weeks now.

DP and I found Sheila Kitzinger's the new experience of childbirth a really excellent preparation for what luckily turned out to be a birth that did go really well - but we're both convinced that the thinking and prep that we did as a result of reading the book helped to make it so... though I know we can't always be in control of what happens.

growingweeble - good luck over the next week Your description of why you did not like the hypnobirthing books pretty much matches mine. I found it a bit patronising and felt lectured to (which I found ironic considering the whole concept is to go against the medical lecturing about how birth should be). I especially found it hard to take serious when she described visualising your vagina opening (when baby crowning) like 'the petals of a rose folding outwards'

I think you may have also put me of Ina May also...

Perhaps I should just go into it without reading anything, lets face it all those women described in Marie Morgan's book never read a thing did they!

Everyone is different, but I personally really needed to read everything I could. The Juju Sundin book is called Birth Skills (not active birth like I thought). Basically, she just describes what is happening to your body during a contraction and proposes movement, breathing, visualisation, etc to help you get through each one. It's not rocket science, but I found it quite helpful.

I think it's also worth trying hypnobirthing as so many people swear by it. I personally don't quite get why it's supposed to make such a difference, but given the strong recommendations it gets, I thought it was worth a try. I couldn't stomach the book, but the CDs were quite good. I've used the Natal Hypnotherapy ones. I'm not quite sure I get why they are supposed to make such a difference as they are basically relaxation tapes. But, hey. If there is a chance of them helping, then I'll dedicate some time to listening to them!

All the best with your birth preparation SummerHols.