is this weird?

[meatntattypie]

Pal and work coleague has been trying for a baby for about 3 years.
Me too.
We bounce off each other as we are in the same boat.
She is now pregnant.(Im not)
I am SO excited for her, so chuffed and every time i think of her in my head i cant help but smile to myslelf, she has waited so long, its the best news i have had in ages.

She has a lovely DH but he isnt up to blood and gore, so the other day she asked me if i would be with her for her birth.
I immediately said absolutely yes, i was thrilled.

But dh says its weird as we havent known each other for long.

She doesnt have family or close friends nearby, and doesnt think her hubby will be very good when it comes to it.

Is it weird? He has taken all of my excitement away from it now.

hmmm?

I don't think it's weird, she needs some support and she sees you as someone who can provide it. As long as you are happy to do it and you don't think it's weird, you should go for it.
However, take note that everyone I know has given birth in the early hours of the morning. If you commit yourself to this, it may well mean receiving a phone call at some insane hour of the night and spending the rest of the night waiting for it to happen. According to the hospital policy up here in the north of England, because you are not the babies father, you will be chucked out of the hospital as soon as the baby is born!
Just make sure you are prepared to do this for her rather than let her down when she obviously needs someone she can rely on.
I'm not criticising you, just saying that she is asking a lot and you need to be prepared for that.

not weird at all. a wonderful thing to be asked.. shows how much she values and supports and trusts you

as a doula, i support women i've known for days or weeks, so it;s not hte lenght of time you know someone, but how much trust and faith you have in them

what a lovely compliment she has paid you

where i am familiar with, the hospital asks you to leave when the mother is transferred to the PN ward, whihc could well be a couple of hours after the birth.. the birth partners can stay until the mother is settled on the other ward...

I really don't think it's weird. My DP is going to be away for a business trip scarily close to my due date, so I've asked my friend if she could be my birth partner during that time if need be. She's not one of my oldest friends by any means, it's just that out of all the people I know I have a good feeling she would be the best and most sympathetic birth partner. Sometimes you just have an instinct about these things - something that perhaps blokes wouldn't understand so easily - so perhaps you should trust your friend's instinct and go with it. As long as you feel happy with it yourself of course!

i think it's lovely! not weird at all

my best friend has said that she'd like me at her birth rather than her dh as he doesn't like that sort of thing.

she wouldn't have asked you if it wasn't what SHE wanted, and that's what counts.

i think it would be a fantastic thing to do

I don't think its weird - I think its really lovely. A huge compliment to be asked to help/witness something so utterly amazing.

I'd be honoured if someone asked me to...

Not weird at all. I had known my friend for 3 years which isn't long really and I was her birthing partner for the very same reasons as the OP's friend.

Not weird at all and kind of you to agree.

She would know a doula for even less time (and you're free )

If neither you nor she thinks it's weird then it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.

When I had DS1 both my DH and my best friend (of 15 years) were there because I knew DH would be pretty useless (not unsupportive just scared etc). When I had DS2 last year DH stayed at home with DS1 and my friend was my birth partner. However, there was a time when it looked like she might not be able to be there. My solution was to call the girl who had been my assistant at work when I was expecting DS1! Although I'd not seen her much since DS1 had been born she'd been a fantastic support to me at work during my first pregnancy and I knew she's be a good birth partner for me. Other people might have though that a bit weird but she and I were happy.