Having flashbacks to my emergency c-section and now I am pregnant again, please please reassure me.....

[ThePFJ]

I am now pregnant with my second baby, not due until October... early days yet I know. I have just remembered in its entirity just how AWFUL my first birth was. To cut a LONG story short, I was trying for 24 hours and they gave me all sorts of drugs and gas etc. They tried to break my waters several times with giant hooks and I remember half way through floating outside my body and being told that baby wasn't lining up to my cervix properly, and later I had the shakes so bad I thought I was dying... and finally them wheeling me down for a c-section in the end to save my baby. The whole thing was terrifying, and I am hoping the midwife will agree to a planned c-section this time. Please please please can someone with this sort of experience tell me that a c-section the second time will be MUCH easier?!!! I have fantasies about booking the birth and being in and out the same day... does it work that way???

(I am too scared to even think about trying a VBAC my feet are tiny and I probably have a birthcanal that is too small?)

Thank you so much in advance....

I had an emergency c-section first time as my pelvis was too small to allow my baby through after forcepts and vontose, i was rushed for c-section shaking badly and struggling to stay awake very scary, I asked for an elective c-section 2nd time and it was great quick, calm, and my recovery was very fast back to full function within 2 weeks also i was discharged after 30 hours from hospital i felt great.

I also had an elective c-section with my 3rd which was equally as good and went home less than 24 hours later and was back on the school run 2 weeks later please dont worry you do have the right to request a c-section and stick to it if that is what you want. Try and keep positive every birth is diffrent and my 2 good births have left me very positive about my overall bith experince. Good luck with baby and Congratulations.

Wow, thank you thank you, thats EXACTLY what I wanted to hear.

You are a star!

XXX

I had a crash section under general anaesthetic after a failed ventouse first time round, which left me very traumatised.

Second time, I had absolutely no inclination to go for a vbac, and had a lovely calm planned section, which went a long way towards helping me get over my demons from the first birth.

I stayed in for two nights after, but to be honest it was nice to just concentrate on myself and dd and rest up, not sure they would have let me out any earlier.

hth

I had an emergency forceps delivery 15 months ago which was the end of a traumatic birth and left me with a lot of damage.

Planning an elective c-section this June with #2. Partly to prevent more damage and partly to give me some control over the fears and unknowns that would haunt me worse if aiming for a vb.

I think pregnancy is a time of many odd dreams and nightmares with all those hormones about - I'm having tons. A fair share of mine are about the first birth and the one to come so I think it's normal for your brain to go over it a lot.

The Birth Trauma Association has a good website and if you need counselling to help calm you before this birth then get your GP involved. If you think it's a fair summary you could explain you are having some of the symptoms of post tramatic stress and want to avoid depression or high anxiety through this pregnancy.

I hope things settle well and that you soon feel more in control of your pregnancy this time around.

I had a crash section with my 1st under GA as my dd became distressed. It was horrible. I decided to go for a VBAC next time. However, I failed to progress and ended up with another csection. I had this one with a spinal and it was a better experience.

However, I do now wish I had had a planned csection. I think I would have than been in a better position to request seeing the actual delivery etc.

If i had another I would definately have a planned section.

It's good to hear the two positive stories above.

I can't post a reassuring story yet, but have a section planned for my second birth for similar reasons. I did a lot of counselling and CBT between the birth and this pregnancy, and they will probably suggest that you speak to someone too. It is perfectly reasonable to request a section following a traumatic birth, so start discussing this with them now and get it booked, that way you can start to try to relax about the birth.

Good luck and best wishes.

I had a first birth very like yours ThePFJ (emergency cs when baby was in danger after a long labour) and I had an elective cs for my second.

It was SO different in every way, and an absolutely fantastic experience. Calm, peaceful, pain-free - I was just chatting to the surgeon about name choices while my dd was lifted into my arms. My recovery was quick and easy too, totally unlike my first cs. I was up and walking the next morning, and was told I could leave the hospital 24 hours after the cs.

My one bit of advice is to take it easy and plan as much help as you can in advance. Don't try and do too much straight away.

Thanks so much, I really appreciate you all taking the time out to talk to me.

Lovethesea - you mention dreams and nightmares, well I just woke from a dream about a giant oak tree crashing into our house from the sky. I ran in to save the fish inside. One was alive, so I scooped it off the floor and put it in a glass of water, which shattered in my hand, dropping the poor fish again and injuring it further. I tried several other glasses with the same result. My father came in and I shouted for him to help me quick... he took the fish, put it in the sink (phew) and then took a carving knife and sliced it in half!!!!!

Fish in water I expect refer to baby in my tummy.... either that or I have fish anxiety!! I have been so on edge since I remembered the shaking from the first birth.

I always thought a planned c-section would be relaxing in comparison, and it would look as if this is most very probably going to be true. Unless they put my baby inside a wine glass!! (laughs)

Just a small note about the shaking (I remember shaking badly after the birth, although wasn't surprised by this at the time), that I was warned to expect a bit of shaking after the section too. Apparently it's due to the drop in body temp after being half-naked in a cool theatre, and possibly also the anaesthetics have this effect I'm not sure.

It's good to be a bit prepared so that you know it's a normal thing and not a problem.

Bloody dreams as well- I'm starting to hate going to sleep now, they seem to be getting worse the closer to d-day I come (6 weeks away now). As far as I remember, that's a completely normal pg thing too and happened a lot (although mostly just weird baby-related dreams) with dd.

HTH

Your first birth sounds very like mine too. I now have a section booked for forthcoming DC2 and the consultant seemed very happy to agree to it. The physical problems I had are one aspect, but they do also take the trauma into account - if you are petrified of a VBAC, tell them.

I've been told they expect me to be in for approx 3 days - I'm OK with that as I think that time should help me recover in peace, be with the baby and get started with breastfeeding, as I have a boisterous 4yo at home (though of course I'm also worried about how much I'll miss him!).

Good Luck Fatseal... hope your dreams don't get too horrible.. 6 weeks to go though, you must be SO excited!!!!

MarineIguana - 3 days sounds great, time for you and baby to bond without other concerns getting in the way. My little boy will be 2 and a half when I have this baby and I know I'd miss him too, but I would also love me and baby alone time.

The more you girls tell me about having births along the same lines as mine the better I feel! I think the word 'trauma' actually suits how I feel about my first birth ideally. Being more in control of my next birth really really appeals.

Bet I dream about fish tonight!

I was in hospital 6 days after DD's awful delivery so 3 days would be a great improvement for me. I'll have a madly wonderful 19 month old at home so not expecting any rest for the next few years really ..... :-)

I had an EMCS with my first, left me quite traumatised and was a lot like you Op. When I was pregnant with DS2, my MW was lovely and at our first appointment I said straight away I wanted an elective, and didn't have to battle with anyone, they were quite accomodating with it. I also had an elective with ds3.

Elective sections are far more relaxed than emergency ones, for obvious reasons, plus you won't have been labouring and will feel so much more energetic and able to cope.

Thanks 5inthebed

Lovethesea - stupid fish dream. Had a 'threatened miscarriage yesterday' but all seems to be well now and I should probably carry this baby to term. They are doing more tests on me tommorrow to make sure. I guess the ominious fish was trying to tell me something. And yes, you are right, there is NO rest for the wicked.

My first was very much like yours. 30 hideous scary awful hours in labour ending in an emergency section. Awful awful awful, I still hate to think about it all too closel.

2nd time around I was terrified i would be denied a section, or told I had to try for a VBAC, but when I went to see the consultant he simply opened his diary and booked me in for a planned section. It was an utterly fantastic, happy, relaxed experience. Nothing at all like first time around. I healed super quickly (without having had the 30 hour trauma before hand to exhaust my body), and had no trouble coping with newborn and toddler (physically that is!).

3rd c-section (also planed) was just as relaxed as 2nd). Good luck.

PFJ- Hope you're alright after the threatened miscarriage- as if you haven't enough to worry about. As you say, stupid fish dream!

6 weeks to go- going crazy from the waiting, it's winding me up something awful. There are so many good stories about elcs on here though that I have been reassuring myself with, so hopefully I'll be holding the new LO very soon.

Thanks Nelly, all this is SO positive!!

If my hormone levels are right when they take my bloods tomorrow, the first thing I am telling my midwife on the first appointment is I want a planned CS and I am not taking no for answer!

Go PFJ! Keep us posted on how the appointment went. Fingers crossed

Hi everyone,

Looks like its game over, but I shall try again and definately get my planned c-section come hell or high water.

Was so extra nice of you all to post here with your reassurances, please treat your selves on me. Possibly with something chocolate flavoured...

As I said... STUPID FISH DREAM. I think we should start a thread about how pregnant women get more prophetic when those hormones are flying around, because I know I am not the only one!!

Love and hugs.

XXX

Really sorry to hear that take good care of yourself.

You can write to the hospital consultants and get the c-section planned without being pregnant. This is what we did as I wouldn't even try without having the promise in writing, so if it's not too painful you could do that and feel as if you were "getting on with something".

Good luck for the future.