mosschops' debriefing goes really well :-)

[mosschops30]

Im so glad I did it, I almost chickened out this morning but it was so worth it.
The advanced midwifery practitioner I went to see was there the night of ds2's birth, she helped me make the decision to go for c section and she assisted in the procedure. She was also the one who got me out of bed after my re-suturing and washed me so it was nice to see her.

She answered my questions honestly, we spent ages going through my notes, its amazing how mcuh I missed.

Its given me so much to see that I was never going to manage a 3rd normal delivery, ds2 was stuck, i wasnt contracting and as a whole picture it was pretty bad, so we talked about how it was the right decision and even if I had the synto she was 99.9% sure the result would have been the same.

She didnt stick up for anyone, she urged me to write to the head of midwifery because what happened to me shouldnt happen again.

I have also decided to talk to a solicitor about possible legal action.

If anyone is suffering from the trauma of birth can I recommend a debrief with someone you trust. I feel much lighter

am so so glad that you have got a positive result from this. it is worth the pain and upset of going over it, to start healing and moving forward

sad that you are considering legal action, shows what a terrible time you did have of it

well done for doing this !

thanks lulu. I remember you being on my original threads and know you have an interest in people whove had traumatic births.
I am going to write and complain about the whole process but will also praise those midwives and doctors who made such a difference. I have to say that 98% of my care was excellent it was just the odd few that let it down. And of course the lack of cleanliness which led me to having the infection

I had decided against pursuing legal action until I went to see a consultant privately last week and he said that the burst abdomen was almost certainly due to poor surgical technique.
It was then that i thought if someone has fucked up then I deserve to be compensated for all the trauma both me and dh went through.
But I would also like some form of reply from the head of midwifery about everything

totally agree re the trauma you went through and DH. it was a nightmare.

really glad that you can feel postive about most of your care, and have started to work through it all.

i hope that you continue to feel better and positive and heal fully in every way

Pleased to hear this went well for you, and feel lighter, that sounds so much better.

Hopefully this is a huge step forward in the healing process, good luck with the next ones.

I've been following you horror story and I'm glad you've had the de-brief I hope it brings you come closure and you can move on xxx

that's good to hear, mosschops. well done for being brave enough, given what you've been through.

Glad it went so well, mosschops - I am a huge advocate of debriefs (though my 'traumatic' delivery was nowhere near as bad as yours!).

I'm sorry that there was incompetence involved - it's also good to hear about all the great care you did get.

I hope your healing continues apace

thanks for lovely posts
Im glad ive done it and she said i can go back as many times as i like or need to.