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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Homebirth with a high BMI and mild complications in previous labour?

8 replies

ChairmumMiaow · 29/01/2010 14:13

With DS I considered a home birth but was told that with my BMI (I think it was about 38 or 40 at the time) they wouldn't even consider it. I didn't argue as DH wasn't too keen.

My labour really wasn't what I wanted, and I felt that it was because I went into hospital and lost control of the situation.

I had a bloody show and wasn't sure if it was 'too' bloody so went into hospital to get looked at. They put me in a bed, on my back and put a monitor on my tummy. They were getting 'irregular' readings and although I thought (and suggested) it was because the belt didn't stay on well and kept slipping, I didn't argue much and they broke my waters and put a scalp monitor on DS, telling me I had to stay on the bed on my back

It all went downhill from there - Couldn't use my tens machine because of the monitor, felt sick so they gave me an anti-emetic and wouldn't let me have gas & air and I had pethadine because I was scared!. Got dehydrated so went on a drip and ended up having an epidural (or actually 4 attempts that didn't work properly)

In the end I was so spaced out (and so was DS when he emerged, and quite blue - apgar of 5) that I basically rejected DS. I perfunctorily tried him on the breast but he was too drugged up to be interested and I spent the next 3 days letting anyone and everyone else hold him!

It wasn't until the end of day 3 when he finally latched and fed that we started really bonding (and breastfeeding ended up being fine for us - still going at 2yo!)

Anyway, this isn't what I want but I'm quite scared of the arguments with the doctors etc if I fight for a homebirth. DH was scared by our last experience too, so he's very wary of not being in a hospital.

Anyone had any of these sorts of experiences and still managed to get a home birth? I have a good local support group so will go to them if I feel I've got a chance but don't want to expend energy I don't have fighting over this!

OP posts:
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mears · 29/01/2010 14:20

Is it a homebirth you want, or a birth that does not have any interventions? That can be achieved in hospital too. What is your BMI currently as there are increased risks that need to be discussed and from there you can make a decison about whether you want a home or hospital birth.

Speak to your community amidwife and ask who the supervisor of midwives is that you can talk to

supervisor information leaflet

The supervisor of midwives is there to support you in whatever choice you make.

ChairmumMiaow · 29/01/2010 14:32

BMI was 36 at booking, but I lost half a stone in the first trimester so at that point it would have been 34.8! No idea what I weigh now but I only came out of my normal jeans a week or so ago

Ideally I would like to be in my own home, but I didn't like being in hospital at all, and while it was a good thing in the circumstances, (they kept me in till DS was latching 'ok') it was really stressful and I was unable to sleep during that time because of the constant noise. I hated it.

If a homebirth is not sensible, then I am going to try my best to stand my ground about interventions (I wish I had pushed them to check DS's heart with a doppler before breaking my waters) but I just want a more relaxed environment than that delivery suite with the metal bed and the glaring lights!

OP posts:
mears · 29/01/2010 14:38

Your BMI is in the normal range. You are operhaps stressing unnecessarily. I don't see why you would have to 'fight' for a homebirth. Just contact your midwife and request one.

heth1980 · 29/01/2010 14:40

There's no reason you can't have a home birth as a larger lady provided you don't have any of the associated complications (high bp or gd etc). My Bmi was 36.4 at my booking appointment and I am having a home birth this time round as I have had a completely complication free pregnancy.

JamesAndTheGiantBanana · 29/01/2010 14:52

Poor you, I went through a very similar set of circumstances with my first birth too as I have a high bmi (much much higher than yours) They tried the stomach monitor, belt didn't stay on well so they insisted on internal monitor, breaking my waters with her nails, then I had to lie flat on my back, had gas and air but nothing else. Luckily(?) my birth sounds like it was faster than yours so even though I was in extreme pain no-one suggested an epidural or anything.

I too was so spaced out that initially I rejected my son, but thankfully it wasn't too long before I came round a bit and could bond with him.

I'm 25 weeks pregnant with dc2 and scared like you (I had a thread on this the other day, here ) I have booked an appointment with the anaesthetist and my midwife on wednesday to discuss my fears.

Maybe you could do the same? There's no reason why we have to allow this to happen to us again.

mears · 29/01/2010 15:09

You cannot be prevented from choosing whatever birth place you want. Please look at th elink I posted earlier. The supervisor of midwives is there to help you make informed decisions and get the care you want.

Noone can tell you that you are "not allowed".

You can only be advised.

ChairmumMiaow · 29/01/2010 15:15

thanks mears - I just want to feel that if I am advised against it, it is for the right reasons, and not just because of one little figure!

I will try to talk to DH about it and will read your link

OP posts:
mears · 29/01/2010 15:30

What you want to do is sit down with your midwife and DH and discuss the possibility of homebirth. If there are any issues your midwife should advise you what they are and what they mean so that you can make an informed to choice to agree or disagree with her advice.

You can seek further advice from the supervisor of midwives if need be.

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