4th degree tears - any positive recovery stories?

[Rubberplant]

About three weeks ago I had a pretty terrible birth which resulted in 4th degree tears. (I had to make a split second choice between an assisted delivery or an emergency c-section).

I'm terrified about what the future holds, especially in respect of maintaining control of my bodily functions!

I am going to see a physio who I hope will be able to provide some help with exercises.

I am distraught that this has happened to me. Constantly hearing from health professionals how unusual it is to have 4th degree tears hasn't helped.

No experience personally but I'm sure you are doing the usual stuff to help ease the pain?

Arnica cream and tablets (must be 200C, anything less isn't strong enough)

Witch hazel, tea tree, lavender, aloe vera in bath water and add it to your pads if you are still bleeding.

Put pads in the freezer.

Put a small gel ice pack in your knickers.

No experience but it is still very early days for you. A lot can happen once it heals properly and your body returns to normal. A friend of mine suffered a nasty 3rd degree tear and after a few months she was fine but it did take time.

Congratulations on the birth of your baby

Bumping for you so that someone with experience can help you x

Hi Rubberplant. Sorry to hear you've had such a traumatic time. I suffered a 4th degree tear just over two years ago and had a pretty amazing recovery.

I never really had any pain from it (for which I know I'm incredibly lucky) but in the beginning I was terrified of what the future might hold, what with all the medical staff talking to me of faecal incontinence. I never had any problems though. Thankfully no incontience of any kind.

I had the physio appointment where I was shown properly how to do pelvic floor exercises and scared to death with stories of women who can't keep a tampon in. Well, that made me do the exercises religously for a few weeks but I have to admit that I didn't keep up with them. I had a follow up consultant appointment where the doctor stuck a finger up my bum, asked me to clench and declared me fine . And that was pretty much that.

I was very tentative and scared in the beginning, not to mention angry that this had happened to me. All I could think about was how I had ruined my body for a baby that I didn't really want (I had horrible PND - I love him to bits now).

How are you doing at the moment?

I know two women who had 4th degree tears. One made an absolutely perfect recovery - sp much so that she opted for a vaginal birth for her second baby instead of the recommended c section, as she really couldn't see what the big deal was about even if it should recur. The other woman not only had a 4th degree tear but also a fistula which was repaired a few months after the birth. 100% recovery, absolutely no continence issues and feels like everything down there works fine.

Hi Rubberplant

Sorry you have had a traumatic time. How are you doing now? I too had a 4th degree tear after giving birth to my dd 3 years ago. I was in shock at how much pain I was in following the birth, and struggled to bond with my DD for a long time. The whole experience left me really traumatised and I decided I would never have another baby again.

I was told when I left the hospital that I would have follow-up physio appointments. I never heard anything from them again, moved house 2 months later and just wanted to put it all behind me so never followed it up. In terms of long term problems, everything seemed fine for a couple of years, although I do struggle with my bowel functions sometimes. I am now 30 weeks pregnant again (I changed my mind!) and all is not right down there - am starting to prolapse and have bulges in places I shouldn't. I am having a CS this time, and a referral to a consultant following this birth.

My advice to you would be to keep up the physio/pelvic floors - whatever they tell you to do. I wonder whether the fact everything is going a bit wrong for me now is because I never had any of that. Accept that you will feel traumatised and deal with it now rather than brushing it under the carpet as I did. And lots of tea trea oil baths, don't let yourself get constipated and rest lots. It did take a while but I felt back to normal after a few months. You are going through the worst bit now and it will all get better - you will come to terms with what happened and it will heal and you will feel yourself again

ps. sorry it's so long!

Thanks for all your responses.

Wellieboot, I do feel traumatised and it hasn't helped that none of the so called health professionals seem able to engage me about this. They simply talk about the mechanics not the emotions.

I'm aware that I'm very much on edge which isn't helped by the fact my toddler screams everytime the baby cries. I have asked to be referred to a counselling service as I desperately want to talk to someone about how I feel.

Good luck with the c-section and follow up appointment with the consultant.

MamaVoo - I also feel that I've ruined my body and wonder why. I wanted a 2nd child so much, but I didn't expect things to turn out like this! Hopefully the counselling will help me deal with my emotions.

Good idea about the counselling. I just wanted to reiterate what wellieboot said - your body will heal and you will feel yourself again.

Rubberplant there is an excellent thread in health section of Mumsnet for ladies who have suffered from 3rd and 4th degree tears sphincter injuries and the like which you shouod check out, is a great support network.

I just wanted to post on this thread as I remember reading it three years ago when I had a fourth degree test and was desperately looking for stories to make me less fearful. I just wanted to share my positive recovery experience - I had a fourth degree test which was followed by a years physio through the hospital. I was lucky not to experience any continence issues and healed well. 3 years on I had another baby (elective c section) and feel absolutely fine - just wanted to share my story in case another new mum stumbles upon this thread. It’s not all terrible and you can absolutely heal well and lead a healthy life