Please talk to me about 'breathing the baby out'!

[BellaBalloon]

I have failed on the perineum massage front but would obviously love love love to avoid tearing if at all poss. On fact it's the only bit i'm really worried about. Can handle pain and vomming - in my mind at least

Does it essentially just mean, push like you're doing a poo, only don't hold your breath?

With dd1 I didn't tear but got a scrape that really hurt afterwards, so with dd2 (now 6 months) I asked the midwife to lubricate me really well ALL OVER the area. I think this is very important.

I think one of the reasons for the scrape with dd1 was that I didn't have the urge to push so had to push into my bottom when I felt a slight twinge that I guessed was a contraction (didn't feel those either!!) So I ended up pushing to get her out.

But with dd2 I did feel a slight urge to push near the end and the midwife told me when I got that to not push but just breath through the urge instead. So I just grasped a pillow and breathed fast to stop myself pushing, you know, really tried to control it. Anyway I didn't push and the contractions (I'm guessing) pushed the baby out on their own.....slowly - so, no tears or scrapes. I was so relieved.

My advice would be to concentrate on your breathing to try and take control of that urge to push. I did it fast through my mouth. And don't forget the lube!

i held my breathe! Or else i was yelling. She told me not to yell, so i held my breath, she told me to breath so i yelled. Could not actually figure out how to just breathe AND push...it was just like a big poo. A big stuck poo that needed some gritted teeth.

I say that, ignore me completely as I tore a little. Not enough to need stitches at all though, and no massage this time for me either.

good luck!

oh yes, it was a 'scrape' that is what she called it. Yeah, right.

Not quite sure what you mean by that Pavlov but I did have a scrape - on the inside of my labia, like the top layer of skin had been taken off. Def not a tear. Must have happened with friction I guess, that's why I recommend loads of lurication.

actually 'loads of lubrication' would be even better

No sorry was not referring to you not having a scrape, i was referring to what mw told me i had. Sorry, not doing well with my posts today

Oh I see, no probs

my post should have read more like: oh yes, it was a 'scrape' that i had, that is what my midwife called it. Yeah, right .

better?

I just pushed like mad whenever I felt a contraction.I didn't have pain relief,so I could actually feel the baby moving down with each push.However,you must stop pushing when the midwife tells you to.She will need to stop the babies head coming out too quickly-this is what causes tears.As the babies head emerges she will say "stop pushing",but obviously your natural instinct is too keep pushing! I practised stopping pushing loads in the last trimester(don't laugh!),as I was DETERMINED not to have stitches.I would practise pushing then say stop,and I would blow,blow,blow and really concentrate,LOL! But it worked! Both deliveries I just stopped pushing,blew,blew,blew...one more small push...and out they popped! Well,it wasn't quite tht easy,but you know what I mean.I also did perineal massage.I left the bottle on the loo,and 3 times a day rubbed a few drops in from 3 months on.Must have worked,DS1 9lbs 7oz,DS2 10lbs 11ozs,no stitches or tears with either!

10lbs 11 and no stitches!! or drugs?
Aye carumba!!
you are hinspirational

Woopsidaisy: Left the bottle of what in the loo to rub on perineum 3 times daily? I'm using wheatgerm oil for my perineal massage, is this the best? Thanks.

I went to a yoga birth rehearsal at the weekend that talked about breathing the baby out. The technique we were taught was less "pushing" and more breathing out while consciously releasing the pelvic floor. You can help avoid scrapes and tears this way.

You might want to check out the book "Mothers Breath" by Uma Dinsmore-Tuli.

I just pushed when the midwife said push and breathed when the midwife said breathe, hell if the midwife had said "go and make me a nice cup of tea, it'll help the baby come out" I would of done it!!
Oh I have 2 children no tears with either of them. Thank the lord because it was painful enough without them.

Breathing the baby out is all about when your body takes over, and you relax and let it happen...this really did happen to me on third birth- I just let it happen..i could feel it all happening and just let my body do it, didn't need any pushing, it was more like a 'letting go' of trying to be in control, I just concentrated on breathing and allowing it to happen....does that make sense?

I never tore with any of mine btw, but I think that is more down to individual physiology etc...but when they want you to pant, they don't want you to push- forcing the baby out too quickly and I think they worry about a tear...am not sure. My best frind is in the 3rd year of her midwifery degree so could check wi her?

I had every intention of 'breathing' my baby out but in reality your body takes over and you cannot fight the urge to push (that's what I found anyway).
Midwife told me the panting is to stop you pushing when she doesn't want you to, but I didn't have to do much of this.
I had 'scrapes' too but no tears and I pushed for 45 mins virtually non stop so I don't think tearing is relative to length of pushing or whether you actively push or 'breathe.'
BTW - not tearing is not the be all and end all. I was desperate not to tear, and didn't, but 13 weeks on one of my scrapes hasn't healed yet whilst friends who did tear are all fine now :-(

I think when they talk about 'breathing the baby out' it is about NOT doing any active pushing.

Both my labours have involved involuntary pushing, my body just does is for me. It's been described a bit like vomiting (nice), i.e. your body is expelling something and you have no control over it.

I only did one conscious push with my 1st labour and that was to expel the placenta.

So if you are lucky enough to have your body pushing the baby out for you, all you have to do is concentrate on calm deep breathing to help you deal with the intensity of the sensations / pain.

You can also do active breathing as the baby crowns to slow down this expulsive movement which is to pant or blow. This can help prevent tearing (although I still tore with both babies).

I also found having a graze (like a scrape I assume) much more painful to heal than my actual tear. I do wonder if it was because the tear is stitched up whereas a graze can't be.

I don't know whether you will be able to convince the midwife or not since I'm not sure if its common practice here, but some people on a US natural birth discussion board were discussing the midwife applying hand-warm olive oil or wheatgerm oil to the perineum actually at the moment of crowning. That sounds to me as though it would be wonderfully soothing and also help with lubrication.

I've heard of the same BB but for me the grazing wasn't on my perineum, it was right by my urethra so would have needed lubrication all over to prevent it!
I do think it's because the graze can't be stitched that it takes longer to heal. Also with mine being where it is, it's constantly getting urine on it which doesn't help.
I'm in for some cauterisation if it doesn't heal in another too weeks - lucky me!

I think it's a euphemism

As some have already beautifully described- it is all about letting your body taking control of the birthing of your baby. The old fashioned image of a woman on her back with MW shouting 'PUSH!!!!!' should be forgotten IMO. Much better to find yourself a nice comfortable position with your pelvis fully open (ie NOT lying down or sitting)- so on all fours, squatting, leaning over a chair/bed... And then if you havent had an epidural then you will be able to feel your body expelling the baby- it can be a really weird sensation when you are able to let your body take over completely. Really important to make sure you are eating/drinking little bits during labour so that the muscles in your uterus have energy to do their job. If you have a long labour this is even more important so that you dont get too tired.

As for tearing- dont worry too much- if you are worrying about it, it might stop you letting your natural urges take over .

with second dd my contractions stopped completely as dd crowned. i was pretty much drug free, on all fours and literally breathed and wiggled her out by moving my pelvis around. very strange sensation, as i wondered what i was going to do with a baby half out and no contractions.

no tears or grazes either.

i so want to achieve this for my third birth but am worried as i remember when contractions kicked in for birth no.2 all my fears came back and i didn't keep on top of my breathing at all. BUT i did for one major contraction and it made all the difference so i know it can be done - just need to know how on earth i can achieve it for every single one? have been reading about 'balloon breathing' in hypnobirthing books - anyone used this? any good?

I have heard about 'breathing the baby out' as an alternative to pushing like you're doing a poo in my hypnobirthing research. The practitioner at the information evening for hypnobirthing described how they recommend you breathe out fully and feel the sensation of how exhaling fully gives you the sensation of almost 'pushing' IYSWIM. Having tried it whilst having a poo (sorry TMI) it does seem to have a similar result. No idea how realistic all this is (although she did show us a video of one of her mums talking about how she 'breathed' the baby out and effectively pushed by exhaling rather than straining like she was pooing) as I am pg with DC1 and therefore utterly green, naive and have no idea what I'm in for